The long road home
by tripsonflatsurfaces
Summary: Edward left Forks at eighteen leaving behind his highschool sweetheart and his best friends. After seven years he returns home to be with his ailing father and discovers not everything stayed the way he left it. AH rated m for mature themes.
1. Chapter 1

Bpov

August 31st 2001....

The early morning summer air was hot all around us. I wasn't sure if it was the temperature or if it was him and me here in our place....our meadow on his last morning in the town where we grew up. In the town where we started. He kissed me over and over again with reverence and care. My bare back arched off the grass. I moaned and he moaned. I screamed and he screamed. The perfection of the feeling he gave me could never be duplicated. When it was over and we lay in each other's arms as the sun came up I started to feel the weight of what was coming.

"This isn't goodbye. I'll be back at Thanksgiving. There will be letters and calls, nothing will change us. You're the one. You'll always be the one." he murmured with my sobbing face in his hands. I clung to him as hard as I could but he was going where I could never go. I always knew we were different. This town was a mile long and a mile wide and I knew it would never hold him. He was meant for bigger things. We walked out of the woods as the sun rose that morning. He wiped my tears and kissed me again.

"Tell me you'll come back to me." I whispered through my never ending stream of tears.

"I'll always come back to you. You have my heart Bella Swan and someday I'll marry you. I'll give you everything you ever dreamed of and more." he promised. He ran his fingertips over his class ring that hung around my neck.

"I love you with all my heart Edward Masen, I'll be right here." I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him with all the passion my heart could muster. He laid his forehead on mine, "I love you Isabella Swan." He kissed my forehead, my cheeks, my eye lids and finally my lips again then he walked away. I stood in my yard and watched him leave.

On my eighteenth birthday I paced back and fourth waiting for the phone to ring. I knew he would call today of all days. We had never missed a birthday in our entire lives.

"Bella, You're going to be fine! Everyone might be a little shocked but well shit happens right." Alice sat on the side of the bathtub holding the evidence I would quickly discard.

"I haven't heard anything from him!" I sighed.

"Bella there's something down here for you!" my dad called up the stairs. I took the steps two at a time praying it was him. Praying for some small miracle that he had come home from NYU for my birthday. He hadn't called or written but I knew he still loved me. He promised he would love me forever. On the table was a letter with a New York post mark. I ripped it open, heart pounding. I was dieing to hear from him, to hear anything from him. I could of never imagined what I would get.

Dear Bella,

I know I promised I would be back for Thanksgiving but I'm not coming home. I can't come home. The world is to big. There's so much more to life than Forks. I know you would never leave your dad and I would never ask you too. I'm sorry I did this in a letter but I think it was the best way. Always know that you were my first love, my only love and I'll miss you every day of forever but I have to try this. I have to see if there's more to life.

Always,

Edward.

I dropped the letter like it was burning my fingers and sank down to my knees with my hands clasped over my stomach. It had only took him thirteen days away from home to break every promise he ever made to me. I'd never felt more alone.

7 years later.....

Epov

The club was crowded and hot. My tie was choking me and the bimbo on my lap was a carbon copy of every other woman I'd been with since my book got published. It was another release party where the champagne flowed and everyone was patting me on the back telling me how fucking brilliant I was. I wasn't brilliant, I just had a good memory. My book wasn't as original as all the critics made it out to be. It was simply a memoir about a kid with dreams of being a doctor growing up with his best friends in a small rainy town. 'Forks' was number one on the Times best seller list for the sixth week in a row. I had so many things I wanted to be doing that didn't involve being here. I had a phone call to return to my mother, I didn't call home enough. Once or twice a year if I could help it. I had another manuscript I could be working on but I was stuck at this boring club where the music was to loud and the lights were to dim. This wasn't where I wanted to be anymore.

I snuck out of the club before my agent and my publisher could stop me. New York city at three am wasn't slowing down. It didn't feel like anyone was sleeping. The energy of the city buzzed in my ears like an electric symphony. I shoved my hands in my coat pockets and walked slowly back to my loft. I felt my cell phone buzz in my pocket but ignored it assuming it was my manager calling to chide me for leaving before I could be seen with all the beautiful people he needed me to be seen with. I unlocked the door to my apartment and heard my answering machine taking a message.

"Edward, it's mom. I need you to call me back. It's about your father." she hung up before I could answer the line. It was after three in the morning here. What could possibly be so important? I quickly dialed her back.

"Mom I'm sorry I didn't answer. I was out." I said. She sobbed hysterically into the phone.

"Edward. Your fathers had a heart attack. You have to come home." I sank down into the nearest chair and tried to make sense of her words. My dad was healthy right? I realized I wouldn't know. I hadn't been home since I was eighteen. I hadn't seen them.

"Edward, you have to come home. I wouldn't ask you if it wasn't important. The doctors don't think...." she broke down again.

"The doctors don't think what mom?" I asked on the verge of tears myself.

"They don't think he's going to make it. You have to come home. I can't do this alone." I moved over to my computer and booked a flight home for as soon as I could which would be in five hours. I assured my mother I was on my way and packed my bags. For the first time in seven years I was going home.

My flight touched down in Seattle from there I had to rent a car and drive five hours to Forks. I called my mother from the road to check my fathers condition and there had been no change. I thought about all the years I'd been away and all the time I'd wasted. I felt stupid and selfish. How could I have done this to him? I was his only son for fucks sake and it took him dieing in a hospital to get me to come home. When you're eighteen and away from home for the first time you feel like the world is so big and everything is so new. You don't stop to think about the people you're hurting. You don't stop to think about the unreturned phone calls. I hit the city limits and in the light of the morning sun I could see that everything was the same as I had left it. Some of the store fronts had been updated and it looked like there was a new coffee house next to a kids clothing boutique but other then that it was the same. I drove straight to the hospital to be with my father. When I walked in I immediately recognized a girl I had went to high school with, Jessica Stanley. I wondered briefly if she remembered me.

"Hi I'm here to see Edward Masen." I said quietly. She smiled and wrote down his room number for me. "I read your book." she announced before I walked away. I stopped briefly and looked at her. "Jennifer Hanley was a real slut. I hope I wasn't really that bad." she said. I had changed the names to protect the innocent but apparently I didn't do a good job. I wondered in the elevator how many other people found themselves in the pages of my book. My thoughts immediately turned to my best friends, I hoped that I portrayed them in a flattering light. I honestly never worried about it before because well I had never planned to come back here. My mother was standing outside his room when I rounded the corner off the elevator. I wrapped my arms around her and patted her back. She was just the same as always. I had forgotten how much I looked like her, we had to same bronze hair and green eyes. Our skin tone was the same but she was shorter. My height I got from my father.

"How is he?" I could see his feet at the end of the bed inside his room. I felt sick to my stomach thinking of going in there.

"He's the same. He's delirious and keeps asking for you. I'm so glad you came Edward." she said. Her voice was low and horse.

"You didn't think I would?" I asked her. She shrugged and wrapped her arms tight over her chest.

"You haven't been home in seven years. I didn't know if you would come. I didn't know if you would even return my call." her words were a low direct blow and they cut right through me. I went slowly into my fathers room. He looked tiny in the hospital bed. Not the strapping tall man I remembered. Poles and machines were everywhere. I was scared to go to his side, like if I touched him I might break something or disconnect something. I sat down carefully in the chair at his bed side and put my hand gently under his.

"Edward?" my fathers voice was weak and soft. I scooted closer to him so he didn't have to strain to be heard.

"Yeah dad it's me." I squeezed his hand. He turned his face towards me and smiled weakly.

"You came home." he whispered with an awe that broke my heart in two.. I nodded and forced a smile.

"Yeah I'm here. Don't worry you're going to be fine." I assured him. The statement was as much for me as it was for him.

"Son. You've lost your way but it's ok. You're home now." he opened his eyes and looked into mine. I didn't have the heart to tell him I wanted to run out of this town as fast as I could. I didn't have the heart to tell him I had no desire to stay.

"I'll be here as long as you need me dad. Just rest." I placed my other hand on top of his.

"No Edward there's no time for rest. I have so much to tell you." he said. I had things I wanted to tell him too but I thought there would be time for that later. I always thought there would be more time.

"Dad, there will be time to talk later. Get some sleep." I started to stand up and pull my hands from his but he grabbed on to my hand with all his strength.

"Edward. You have to take care of your mother. She needs you and Edward....Bella....we never got a chance to tell you." My father lay dieing and he was rambling on about my high school sweetheart. I heard my mother come in and move over to his other side.

"Edward. It's ok. You men will talk later." she kissed his forehead gently and looked deep in his eyes.

"No Elizabeth! I have to tell him now. It has to be now. There's no more time!" his voice was strangled and rough. I felt so helpless. His breaths became short and labored. I ran out to get a nurse and when I came back he was gone.

A/n- I know I have other stories started and I should finish those first but some stories beg to be written. I hope everyone enjoys this and the second chapter is almost done. This story was not beta'd and I fully realize the errors made. I am hoping the next chapters wont have so many. As always review review review.


	2. Chapter 2

_Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. _

_Bella~_

I did my best, it wasn't much  
I couldn't feel so I learned to touch  
I've told the truth, I didn't come to fool you  
And even though it all went wrong  
I'll stand before the Lord of song  
With nothing on my lips, Hallelujah Jeff Buckley, Hallelujah

Emmett called to tell me that Edward Sr had passed away last weekend from a heart attack. I didn't ask if the prodigal son had come home or not. As far as I had ever heard Edward didn't call his parents on a regular basis and when he did he never had much to say. I knew he never contacted Alice, Rose, Jasper or Emmett. I unfolded myself from the arm chair in my fathers living room and stretched. I noticed what time it was and remembered I was supposed to pick up Alice on my way to walk Lilly home from school. I tightened my belted sweater around my waist and closed the gate to our yard behind me. I walked quickly passed Emmett Mccarty's childhood home and then turned the corner to pass Rose and Jasper Hale's childhood home. The leafs crunched under my shoes. I took a deep breath of the crisp autumn air. I stopped at Alice's gate and before I could open it she bounded out of her house.

"Does Lilly know I'm coming with you to get her?" Alice asked me all chipper and bright as usual.

"No. I didn't get a chance to tell her. She's asking a lot of questions."

"About?" Alice wondered. We slowed our pace down a block away from the school.

"Why Mr. Masen's picture was in the paper." Everything was difficult to explain to a seven year old.

"He was a nice old fart." Alice smiled. He really was a nice guy. Even after Edward left he always checked on Lilly and I. He was at every birthday and always came to see her on Christmas day.

"I don't know what to tell her." I said. Alice leaned into me for a moment, "Just tell her that he passed away and leave it at that. She's to young to ask the sort of questions you're worried about." Alice was right of course. She was barely ever wrong. Not that I'd ever tell her that. We walked up the sidewalk to Forks Elementary and waited for the bell to sound.

"Are you going to the funeral?" Alice asked me. I had thought about it over and over but couldn't decide.

"I was thinking about it. I don't know if it's a good idea." I reasoned with myself that if Edward hadn't been home in seven years what were the odds he'd come home now. If I were him I'd be worried about the back lash from his best selling book. Since it's release the Fork's Senior High class of two thousand and one had been scandalized. Especially our closets friends. We all had some explaining to do when the book came out and Edward made all our teenage sins public knowledge. Like what really happened to the Hale's family van. Also I had to explain to my father that Edward didn't spend the night every night but a lot of nights. I was so lucky I was over eighteen and already a parent when Edward laid all our business on the table. I was more then sure that the character Stella Vaughn was a direct reflection of his memory of me.

"Will Jake mind if you go? He's weird about you being around the Masen's." Jake was my first and last attempt at dating since Edward. I didn't start dating until two years ago and now things with Jake were so comfortable I didn't see a reason to end it. It was just comfortable. I didn't feel fire on my skin when he touched me and I definitely didn't see a future with him.

"I don't know. We sent flowers from the coffee house. Isn't that enough?" I asked already knowing what her answer would be.

"No. we basically grew up in their house. It's almost rude if we don't go." Alice informed me. I looked up at the autumn sky and tried to ignore her reasoning.

"Are Jasper and Emmett going?" I asked her. She smiled and nodded her head, "Rose can't though because she's working. Black's is staying open so people can go get a beer after the service." I took a deep breath and blew it out.

"I don't have a sitter for Lilly." I informed her.

"You are going to have to do so much better then that. You know your dad will watch her for you."

"Fine. I'll go and I'll see if my dad will watch Lilly." I gave up. Alice always won and this was no exception. The bell rang and I straightened up into 'mommy mode' as Alice called it. It was something I had gotten so good at over the years. If Lilly was present I was almost always smiling. I never wanted to give her a reason to worry. When you're a parent you don't get the luxury of wallowing in self pity over trivial things. I promised myself when Lilly was born I would be the best mother I could be and to me that meant always putting her first. My baby ran out the doors, her reddish brown pigtails bouncing on the sides of her head. I had let her pick out her own clothes today so she went to school in a green cable knit sweater and a black and green plaid skirt with neon yellow tights.. I chuckled again at her bright green cowboy boots.

"Your kid has SO much style." Alice remarked. I elbowed her in the ribs. Alice squatted down and Lilly ran to her with a giant smile on her tiny face.

"Aunt Alice! Aunt Alice!" she cried.

"I love those boots kid. Where can we get some for me?" she asked Lilly. Alice tickled her a little bit and Lilly giggled. I stood patiently waiting for my daughters affection.

"You're little Aunt Alli, you can borrow mine!" she squealed with delight.

"Well that's good to know. One more pair of shoes I can keep off my credit card." Alice kissed her forehead gently and smiled. I couldn't of asked for a better god mother to my daughter. She had been right there with me through all of it. She even came in the delivery room with me when Charlie couldn't take it. Rose on my left, Alice on my right. The way it was supposed to be. The way I hoped it would be forever.

"Do I get some snuggles too?" I asked in a mock whine. Lilly leaned over out of Alice's arms and let me take her. I held my baby close and listened intently while she told us all about her day.

The next morning I checked myself in the mirror one more time. I was thinner then I was seven years ago. I hadn't gotten my hair trimmed or done anything to it in years. I decided I looked worse for the wear and put on some extra cover up and foundation.

"Mommy? Why are you dressed all pretty?" Lilly asked me from my bed. I looked down at my sensible black dress and black heels. If my kid thought this was pretty then maybe she didn't have as much style as Alice claimed.

"I have to go to a grown up thing today. You're going to stay with Grandpa." I informed her. Lilly's eyes looked sad instead of happy. Usually if I told her she got to stay home alone with my dad she was over the moon.

"Mommy I know Mr. Masen died. It's sad." I walked over to my bed and pulled her up into my lap. I kissed her temple running my fingers into her soft hair.

"I know it's sad. He's in a better place though. We just have to remember he was a nice man and he loved you very much." I told her. It was the best that I could do.

"He loved us very much. Remember, you and me is a package deal." I stroked her hair gently and smiled. She really was my whole world. Nothing could compare to being with her.

"You and me for always baby." I reminded her. Charlie called her down to breakfast and I grimaced hoping he had made her toaster waffles and not tried to cook her something himself.

_Edward~_

Well, maybe there's a God above  
But all I ever learned from love  
Was how to shoot at someone who outdrew you  
And it's no complaint you hear tonight  
It's not some pilgrim who's seen the light  
It's a cold and broken Hallelujah- Hallelujah Jeff Buckley

People weren't trying to make conversation with me and for that I was grateful. Mostly it was a muffled I'm sorry or other condolences. My mother was doing so much better then I ever expected. Her eyes were swollen and red but she was doing her best to hold her head up and greet people as they arrived. I knew it shouldn't of felt weird for me to be there but it was. I hadn't set foot in this town until my father was dieing and everyone knew it. I felt their eyes on me when they greeted my mother. I knew what they were thinking. They all thought I was a selfish bastard and I was inclined to agree with them. I hadn't seen any of my old friends yet. I wasn't even sure they would come. I was half scared to go out into town for fear of running into one of them. In a town this small it was bound to happen eventually. "Edward? Edward Masen?" the voice was low and rough. I turned immediately and recognized Emmett Mccarty.

"Emmett. Oh my god you haven't changed a bit." it was cliché but it was all I had. I stuck out my hand, he shook it. I had to smile when he smiled because you couldn't not smile at Emmett. No matter what the situation his smile was infectious.

"I'm really sorry about your dad." He said.

"Thank you for coming." I noticed his left hand ring finger while I was staring at my shoes.

"You got married?" I asked him. He beamed with pride and looked down at his left hand.

"Yeah Rosie and I got hitched six months ago. She's sorry she couldn't make it. She had to work." I wanted to ask him about Bella. Why did my father say her name on his death bed? What did he want to tell me?

"Well I'm very glad you came and I'm sorry we didn't get a chance to talk under better circumstances."

I told him.

"How long are you staying?" Emmett wondered.

"Just until after the burial. I have to start a book tour in a week." I sounded like a pompous ass. Yes a book tour was more important than helping my mother sort out my fathers affairs.

"Some one found their way home." her voice was high and sickly sweet. It could only be one person.

"Alice. Thank you for coming." She nodded curtly and went to go sit down. She was still so tiny. The word petite didn't cover it. What she lacked in size she always made up for in enthusiasm or spite. It depended on the situation.

"She wasn't happy about the book.....and well the other thing." he advised me.

"I gathered a lot of people aren't happy with the book. What was the other thing?" Emmett's mouth gaped,

"You are seriously asking me that?" What else could he be talking about?

"How about the way you rode out of town on your white fucking horse and never thought about who you were destroying?" I whipped around and saw Jasper Whitlock. I stuck my hand out to him but he brushed past me to greet my mother. He took a seat next to Alice and put his arm over the back of her chair. Growing up Jasper was my right hand man. So many times we had covered one another's asses. We had dreams of becoming doctors and opening a medical practice here in town. When I left and never came back I didn't think about what it was doing to him. I didn't think about what it was doing to anyone.

"God I really did a number around here didn't I?" I said to myself.

"Hey a books a book right? I appreciate you letting me off easy man. Bella and Jasper had it way worse then I did." He slapped my shoulder and sat down with my old friends. I wanted to go sit with them. I wanted it to be seven years ago, I wanted to play chess with my dad again and eat my mom's horrible tasting tuna noodle casserole on Friday night so I could go to the football game after dinner. I had to accept that those days were gone. I walked sheepishly over to my mother and helped her to her seat. It was time to say goodbye to dad.

_Bella~_

I was late. So freaking late. The breakfast Dad had cooked for Lilly wasn't even close to edible. So I made them both something which had made me incredibly late. I ran as gracefully as I could into the funeral home scanning the room for my friends. Bless them for sitting in the back row! I quietly walked over to them and took my seat between Jasper and Alice.

"Where the hell were you?" Alice whispered.

"Charlie tried to cook. I couldn't let Lilly eat it." I pulled my sunglasses off and shoved them in my purse. Reverend Webber was speaking about Edward Sr.'s many virtues and what he had given to the community. I tried to listen and not scan the room for his only son. I told myself over and over on the drive that this wasn't about Edward. It was about a sweet old man that was good to my daughter.

"As a special tribute to Edward Sr. Edward Jr and Elizabeth have created a tribute to him in pictures." the lights dimmed. Jeff Buckley's 'Hallelujah' started to play. Edward had to have picked this song. He always had fantastic taste in music. We watched the pictures with teary eyes. I held Alice's hand tight. Jasper put his arm around me. The ending picture was the last one they had taken as a family. It was the day Edward graduated from High school. I knew the picture well, I had taken it. The song ended, so did the pictures. I blotted my eyes with the matted woad of tissues from the bottom of my purse. I saw Edward the first time as he stood to help his mother up. He was still beautiful. The word handsome could never be used to describe him. He was beautiful. Like an angel dressed in a very expensive looking suit. It was black and his shirt was white, no tie and the top two buttons on the collar undone. For a moment I forgot how breath. His hair was still bronze. Not brown or red. Bronze. It was still thick and wild. When I dreamed of Edward in the past it was always one feature that made me weak in the knees, his strong jaw line. How many hours had I spent kissing, memorizing that perfect jaw line?My stomach knotted up inside me. I quickly decided I didn't want him to see me. I didn't want him to know I had been there. I shoved my over sized oval sunglasses on before he could see me. The paul bearers lifted the casket on to their hands. Edward led his sobbing mother down the isle. When they reached the end there was a pause while the casket was turned to navigate the corner. They were stopped right next to us. Edward wasn't more then two folding chairs away. I could of reached out and touched him. As if Alice knew what I was thinking she gripped both of my hands in hers. I turned my face to her instead of looking at him.

"Just breath." she mouthed to me. I nodded reluctantly. A moment later they were gone. The other mourners filed out, Jasper and Emmett included. Alice and I sat there for a long time just staring in silence.

"He never even looked my way, did he?" Alice put her arm around me. I laid my head on her shoulder.

"I'm so sorry." She kissed my forehead.

"Alice?" I said in between sobs.

"Yeah honey?"

"Being an adult fucking sucks." I stood up.

"You've got that one right sister." she put her arm around me and instead of going to the burial we went to go get my kid and then to open the coffee house for the rest of the day.

_Edward~_

When everyone had left I went up to my room to pack. I had a flight to make and I was running out of time. Signing dates and press stops on the book tour filled my head. Anything to drown out the grief and the unanswered questions.

"Edward....You're leaving?" My mothers voice was sad in the doorway of my childhood bedroom.

"Yeah mom. I told you I have a book tour and a signing." I shoved some clothes in my bag more roughly then necessary.

"Ah yes, the book. I always wondered how much of that was true life." she took a seat at the head of my bed pulling a pillow into her lap.

"You read it?" I looked up at her with wide eyes.

"My son wrote a book! Of course I read it." she threw her hands in the air. I smiled at her. Her hair was out of it's usual bun, it fell in soft waves around her shoulders. Her eyes...our eyes were sad but questioning.

"How much of it was true honey?" I blushed at her question. There were a lot of things I had never intended my mother to find out. I suppose looking back on it, it wasn't the best idea to put it in print.

"Give me an example." I turned my back to gather my things off the dresser.

"Plastic wrapping Mrs. Cope's car on graduation day?" that one was easy.

"True. It wasn't all my fault though. Jasper and Emmett helped."

"The underage drinking at first beach?" I winced.

"Yeah. It's true. We weren't drunks or anything."

"Sneaking out of this house nightly to sleep in Bella's bed with her chief of police father down the hall?" I turned around keeping my eyes down. The memory of spooning Bella in her double bed was a rush of unfamiliar emotion.

"It's true. Sorry mom. You can ground me if you want." my attempt at a joke was lost on the moment. She stood in front of me, her arms crossed over her chest.

"And the hero of your story leaves the poor small town girl crying in her yard the morning he leaves town. Is that true too?" she asked. Yes, it was really stupid to put this all in print.

"Yeah, Mom. It's true." I was suddenly extremely ashamed of the promises I'd broken. Jasper was right. I did ride out of town on my white horse and I was a selfish prick that didn't think of the lives he ruined.

"I wish you could stay." she murmured.

"You could come to New York. It's nice there. You'd like it." I cocked my head to the side, knowing she'd never take my offer.

I hugged my mother good bye one more time and backed out of her drive way. I leaned back in the drivers seat and sighed. My eyes burned from lack of sleep and rush of emotion. The events of the last few days had left me tired and drained. The sun was going down as I drove slowly through town. I had just enough time to stop and get a cup of coffee on my way out of town. I quickly turned down main and over to fifth. I parked infront of the small coffee house.

"Spoons. Cute." I said out loud to no one. I walked into the coffee house causing the bell over the door to ring.

"Welcome to Spoons. What can I get for you?" she was leaning over a laptop. Her shiny brown hair was wound up in a pencil, her skin was still pale as cream but her hips were rounder then I'd remembered. She was sexier then my memory gave her credit for.

"Bella." I breathed. Her back and stiffened. She looked up at me with wide eyes.

"Edward. I uh...wow what are you doing here?" she said. She shoved her hands in the pockets of her jeans, her arms were paper thin. Much thinner then before.

"Coffee." my voice sounded weak. I cleared my throat and tried again, "Coffee. I came in for a cup of coffee. You work here?" I tried not to let my eyes roam.

"Black ok?" she avoided my question about her working status.

"Blacks fine. How long have you worked here?" I asked again.

"I own it." she mumbled while she poured.

"That's awesome. It's a great little place. I really liked the name." she handed me a to go cup of hot liquid. She didn't smile or make eye contact with me.

"Are you staying long?" she asked. I ran my hand through my hair.

"I'm on my way out of town actually." I nodded to the rental car parked outside. From the back of the dining room ran a little girl. Her skin was pale like Bella's.

"Mommy. I cant make Pinkies dress go on. Make it go on please?" her voice was like music. She called Bella Mommy. Bella knelt down to her and smiled brightly.

"Of course Angel. Why don't you go over to Aunt Alice's store and see if she has some ribbon for her ear." the little girl ran off yelling for Alice. The door she went through must of connected Bella's cafe to Alice's store.

"You're a mom? I didn't know. I mean no one..." I stammered. My mind was working the numbers. The little girl couldn't of been more then seven. Her hair was an exact cross between my families signature bronze and Bella's brown.

"No one told you? How could they have told you? You don't call. You don't write." her voice was like ice. I looked down at the floor.

"I deserve that." I took a deep breath and let it out, "How old is she?" I asked.

"She turned seven in July." her reply was short, it came through her teeth like it was hurting her to answer me.

"Is she...I mean is there any way she could be...." I heard her laugh and talk to Alice across the way. Her voice pierced something in me. It hurt me to not be the one talking to her and I didn't even know her name.

"Are you asking me if she's yours?" she crossed her arms over her chest and cocked her head.

"Yes. I suppose that's the simple question." I stood there my heart pounding while she deliberated over an answer.

"A lot has happened since you disappeared." was her reply.

"You didn't answer my question." I narrowed my eyes at her. She was being evasive and I couldn't decide why.

"Oh. I have seven years of unanswered questions for you. I think it's best if everyone's questions just stay unanswered." she stepped around the counter and opened the door for me.

"Have a nice flight." She looked up at the ceiling. Her lips formed a tight line. I walked back to my car.

I sat in the passenger seat a moment, looking into the store front window. Bella smiled brightly at her little girl. She dressed the ratty pink bear for her tying a length of ribbon around the ear. She walked back behind the counter. The little girl caught me looking and waved. I waved back and she came closer to the glass. I noticed her smile first, it was Bella's. Her hair was pulled back in a pony tail. Her jaw was strong but feminine. What caught me last were her emerald green eyes. I knew those eyes. I started the engine and pulled away. I turned up the radio trying to drown out my own thoughts but they wouldn't stop. It was a muddy heap of questions with no answers. At the city limits there was a fork in the road. Right would take me back to the residential neighborhood of Forks. Left would take me out to the high way and the airport. Right were possible answers to the questions I had. Left was freedom. I slammed on the brakes at the fork. I cut the engine off and just sat there. Right or left. Left or right. Answers or blissful ignorance.

"Fuck!" I screamed hitting the steering wheel with my fists. I fished my cell phone out of my pocket and turned the car back on. I pulled over to the side of the road. I got out and dialed my agent.

"Marcus, this is Edward Masen." I pinched the bridge of my nose. I couldn't believe I was about to do this.

"Edward. How can I help you?" he was going to kill me.

"I have to cancel the tour. I am staying in Forks." he laughed out loud.

"Is this a joke?" he said. I slammed my hand into my forehead.

"It's not a joke. I am staying here for a while. I'll let you know when I am back in the city."

"Edward! This is career ending move. I know this must be hard for you but you can't go home again."

I let out a strangled laugh, "Oh Marcus, it turns out you can go home again but sometimes it's just not the way you left it." I closed my phone and got back in the car. I drove back to my mothers feeling like I had lost my damn mind.

A/N I wasn't planning to post this soon but after all the wonderful reviews I couldn't keep anyone waiting. Trust me, it only gets better from here. Review review review!


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. I wish I did but I don't and that sucks rocks.

We're taught to lead the life you choose  
(all I wanted)  
You know your love's run out on you  
(all I wanted)  
And you can't see when all your dreams aren't coming true Sympathy Goo goo dolls

Edward~******

It was all so much to take in. I had no clue where to begin. Bella was a mom. That was the thought that stuck out first and foremost in my mind. She clearly was a wonderful mother and her daughter, who's name I still didn't know, seemed like a sweet beautiful little girl. She was seven and she was born in July, that was all I knew. I stomped into my mothers house bags in hand and closed the front door behind me.

"Mom!" I yelled. I dumped my bags in the foyer and began looking through the house for her. I found her in the formal dining room going through papers and drinking a glass of wine.

"I'm right here Edward. Did you miss your flight?" she asked.

"I'm gonna stay for a while. Maybe more then a while. I don't know. Mom, can I live here?" it felt odd to be asking her if I could live in her house. She was my mother, of course she'd let me stay.

"Of course honey but what prompted the sudden change of heart?" I could tell her about Bella's daughter, I was sure she already knew. In a town this small someone having a baby out of wed lock was still sadly a big deal and the rumor mill more then likely ran ramped with speculation. I didn't want to get into that with her right now. She had just buried my dad and had other things on her mind.

"I missed home. I didn't really know it until I came back." It wasn't a total lie.

"Edward, you know you can stay as long as you like and I certainly don't want to be alone right now but have you thought about..." she stopped short. Removing her glasses she pinched the bridge of her nose.

"Thought about what?" I had to admit, between Bella, Bella's daughter and my dad's lost death bed confessional I wasn't thinking about much else.

"Please don't be upset with me. What I am about to say is harsh and it's going to be meant exactly as it sounds." I sat down in the chair in front of me. She walked up the long table and stared out the window a moment before she began to speak.

"You have no friends here. You burned those bridges long ago. No one and I mean no one in this town was happy with the book. Frankly you wrote most of your best friends and classmates as drunk horny overly dramatic teenagers and you made their parents sound as if they were clueless and couldn't keep track of their kids." Her eyes were sad, "I'm sorry to admit that I was one of the parents that couldn't manage their child. If I had kept better track of you maybe you wouldn't of been running into the woods having sex with the chiefs daughter every chance you got." My stomach turned over at the thought that my mother had read all of that. Things I never intended for her, and her specifically to see were all over the pages of the book I had profited from.

"Mom. So much of that was embellished. I am sure people realize that. It's written as fiction." I stood up from my chair.

"I just don't want you to get any wild ideas. You will not be a welcome addition to this community. I only say these things because you are my son and I love you more then my own life. I don't want you to get hurt." her eyes were sadder then I'd ever seen them. I could tell the things she said to me had pained her but she knew I needed to hear them. I walked over, stopped a moment and hugged her tight.

"Thank you for being honest with me." I murmured. She patted my back gently.

"You run along now and get unpacked. If you're going to be staying there's lots of things we need to do." she walked back to her seat at the end of the table and gathered her pile of papers.

"We will have time for that stuff later." I paused, noticing the light blue tri-fold manila folder in her hands, "Is that the estate stuff? I could help you with it....." her face was drawn taught. She held the pile of papers closer to her chest.

"I'll do it." she said in a harsh whisper.

"But Mom I want to help, It's the least I could do." I walked towards her. She stepped back quickly.

"No I was his wife....His partner for thirty five years. This is something I will take care of." she walked away closing the subject.

After three days being the Forks resident shut in got really old. Also the fact that I had no friends here really didn't help anything. Alice didn't speak to me at the funeral, she just gave a persnickety comment and took her seat. Jasper was clearly angry with me. Rose wasn't there and Bella didn't attend. Emmett was the only person in town that had really spoken to me that day. He was the only one that seemed sort of pleased to see me. He didn't offer a shitty comment or a narrowed glance. He was just his warm friendly self. I paced back and fourth in front of my bedroom window, trying to decide if I wanted to leave the house. I stopped briefly and looked around my room. Everything was pretty much where I'd left it. My pictures still hung on the walls with my awards, my trophies were still on the shelves. I walked over to one of the pictures sitting on my dresser, I picked it up and looked over it. Bella and I were young in this photo, not more then sixteen. It was homecoming, her dress was black with little shiny bead things on it. She wore her hair down in these big loose curls because she knew that was how I liked it. Looking at the picture I felt so much remorse for what I had done to her. I sat the picture down and moved to the next. Jasper, Emmett and I had our arms over each others shoulders, our graduation caps were tipped to the side and our retro ray bans blocked our eyes. We wore those damn things all the way through graduation, we were the coolest guys in school and even on the last day we wanted everyone to know it. I'd hurt so many people here. People I loved dearly even after I had left them and never returned. It was hard to admit to myself that the one I missed the most was the girl I'd left behind. She never thought she deserved me. She thought we were to different. Standing in my room I knew I was the one that didn't deserve her. We were different. She was everything beautiful and real. I was ugly inside, tainted by years of thinking that everything should be handed to me on a silver platter. In New York it was so natural for me, if I wanted something I just got it. I wanted to become a writer so I wrote a book. I wanted to make a lot of money so I got it published. I lived a fake life in New York. I knew what I had to do, it was going to be a bitch but I was going to do it. It was time to start making amends to the people I had hurt.

I decided to start where it would be easiest because I was a huge coward. I called Emmett to see if he wanted to go out to lunch. He agreed to meet me at the diner in town. I showed up first and got us a table. Emmett barreled into the small restaurant with his usual charm. He slapped their backs and bantered playfully with the old men at the counter. He waived and smiled at the over sixty waitress's. Just like in high school, the ladies still loved Emmett.

"Thanks for agreeing to meet me." I said. I offered him the seat in the booth across from me.

"I gotta admit man. I admire you for staying." he said with a chuckle. The waitress came, took our orders and left. I let Emmett order for the both of us.

"Why do you admire my staying?" I asked. He laughed.

"Well for starters it takes balls to live in the lions den. Second, the women in my life want your head on a pike man. They are still pissed on a daily basis." He smiled at me. His wife and her friends wanted me dead and he was smiling.

"I am assuming by women you mean Rose, Alice and..." I took a deep breath.

"And Bella? Oh yeah." he finished for me. I groaned. "And you don't even understand how pissed Jasper is." I looked up at him. "Why is he so angry with me? Bella was the one I left in the lurch, not him." I said in a low voice. Emmett leaned forward, "Between you me and the wall. Jasper's life, not so great." I stared at him confused. " Everyone loves him, what's the problem?" I asked a bit sarcastically.. Emmett leaned back against the booth. "Jasper, well he never got over being the Robin to your Batman. At first when you left and never came back he took it ok. He even defended you to most people but after the book got published and word spread around here.....he just sort of feels like you made him into your side kick. He thinks people have a hard time taking him seriously. Bella went through it too." At the mention of her name my stomach filled with dread.

"Em, I hope this isn't horribly uncomfortable but I need to ask you something." I was hedging. He knew it. I knew it and he probably already knew what I was going to ask. he laid his big folded hands on the table top.

"Is she happy?" I wondered out loud. It wasn't the first question I wanted to ask but it seemed the more important.

"She's gotten a lot better. She still lives with Charlie and she runs her own business now. She's done really nice for herself." he beamed with pride. I couldn't blame him. She had made something out of nothing and managed to raise a child while doing it.

"You said she's gotten better? Was she not alright?" Em's eyes moved to his hands.

"We aren't supposed to say anything." he mumbled.

"Em who the hell am I gonna tell? Besides you and my mother no one else is speaking to me."

He mulled it over momentarily, "After she got your letter it was bad. She couldn't function. She stayed in bed all the time. She would cry so hard and she would only sleep when she'd worn herself out. Alice and Rose talked to Charlie about maybe putting her in a hospital or something." I felt like utter shit.

"When did she start to function again?" I asked as our food arrived.

"Edward, she's fine now. Let's leave it alone." I respected his words and backed off. I didn't have any right to be prying into Bella's life anyway. It didn't include me anymore and that was a foolish choice I made along time ago.

"Em I'm sorry if my book hurt you. I meant it as fiction and I didn't think it would upset everyone." he sat his burger on his plate and looked me over seriously.

"Are you sorry you stayed away for seven years?" he asked.

"Yes. I am." I replied.

"Are you sorry you dumped Bella in a letter?" I lowered my eyes, "Yes. You'll never know how sorry."

"Then I accept your apology and I suggest you start fixing it. You can start by paying for lunch and tonight we are going to Blacks. I am not going to put you in front of the entire firing squad at once. The trick is to get one of them then you'll have all of them." I wasn't sure what he meant.

"What?" I asked him. He rolled his eyes, "If Rose trusts you then you can get Alice, if you get Alice then you'll get Bella and we both know that's what you want." he had me pegged.

"I just want her forgiveness. I am not going to intrude on her life in anyway." I didn't know if I should say anything about her daughter. I didn't want to run Emmett off. As I was paying for lunch at the register Emmett told me all about his wedding to Rose. I was sad that I missed it.

"Oh shit." Em said softly. I turned around and looked for what he was seeing out the window. All I saw was a really big guy getting out a dodge ram pick up truck.

"What's wrong?" I asked. Em rubbed the back of his neck.

"Jake Black is on his way in here." he muttered. I took another look. That huge guy could not be little Jacob Black.

"No way. That guy is huge." I took my change from the cashier.

"Edward, there's something you should know. Bella and Ja-" he was cut off with a clap to his shoulder.

"Thought you left town." was all Jake said to me.

"It's nice to see you Jake." I was attempting to be polite. He wasn't doing the same.

"What the hell are you still doing here?" he asked. Em looked really uncomfortable.

"I stayed to help my mom." I was getting really good at all the little half truths I was tossing around lately.

"Do us all a favor and leave before you fuck up anyone's life." his eyes were hard and cold. For a moment I felt like I had no right to be in Forks. Maybe I was wrong for being here. Em tugged his shoulder out of Jake's grasp and moved over to stand beside me.

"Edward is staying Jake. He wants to make things right. You don't have anything to worry about." Emmett made it sound as if I were some sort of a threat to Jake. Jake's posture relaxed a little after he noticed people staring at the three of us.

"Masen it's really none of my business why you're still here but stay away from Bella. She's mine." he whispered. He stalked off to a booth in the back where several men greeted him. Em walked out quickly with me hot on his heels.

"What the hell was that?" I was horrified that on my first outing into town I had almost gotten my ass kicked for no reason.

"Bella and Jake are a thing. He wants more. She doesn't. He's been pushing her to spend time with Lilly which Bella just will not allow." Her name was Lilly. Bella's daughter was named Lilly. It suited her perfectly.

"How long have they been together?" I wondered.

"Two years off and on." he looked at his shoes. I knew he wasn't supposed to be telling me this. I appreciated his inside information.

"Why won't she let him spend time with Lilly?" for some strange reason I loved saying her name. When I did the image of her in the coffee house window sprang into my mind. Yes the name really did suit her.

"She doesn't want to confuse her. Look dude can we talk about something else before I fuck up and Rose kills me?" I slapped his shoulder lightly.

"Sure, sure. What time do you want to go to Black's tonight?" we made plans to meet up around eight. He was kind enough to remind me that charming Rose wasn't going to be easy and to bring my "A" game as he called it. I assured him for Rosalie Hale Mccarty I would bring nothing less.

_Bella~_

Emmett's company truck pulled up in front of the coffee house right before I was about to leave and go get Lilly. I was about to say hello but he grabbed my elbow, hauling me to the store room.

"We gotta talk." he said just loud enough for me to hear. He pushed me in and closed the door. I pulled the light on over our heads.

"Emmett what the hell?" I asked rubbing my elbow.

"I had lunch with Edward today." he said. I laughed, "Em have you been sniffing glue? You couldn't of had lunch with Edward, he left. I was the last one to talk to him."

"Not so much. He's still here." Em's eyes were fixed on me. He was waiting for me to react.

"How long is he staying?" I asked him. Em looked down at his shoes. "Emmett damn it how long will he be here?" I shouted. Em's eyes shot up and met mine, "Indefinitely, Alright! He's here until he feels like leaving." Emmett threw his hands in the air.

"Em you didn't tell him about Lilly did you?" the scenarios of how this could end incredibly badly ran ramped in my mind. What does he know? What could he know?

"I didn't tell him anything. He asked if you were happy." Em's eyes were sad. I could tell he felt like he had betrayed me.

"What did you tell him?" my emotions were getting the better of me. I didn't know whether or not to feel sad that it had taken him this long to ask about me or happy that he finally had asked.

"I told him you were sad but now you're happy. Bell, I really think he's sorry." I gaped at him.

"Sorry? Are you shitting me? He ruined my life!" I started pacing back and forth in the little space.

"Or he made it better. I think it's a glass half empty half full sort of a thing. He just wants to be forgiven that's all." In some sick way I understood what Em meant about the glass half empty half full thing. He had broken me when he left but in the end I think I still got the best parts of the person he was.

"I made my peace with Edward Masen along time ago. I don't need to start dragging all that up again." I bit my lower lip.

"Jake knows he's here. He's not happy." Em informed me.

"Shit how did that happen?" I asked him.

"He was meeting Sam and Jared for lunch at the diner. He told Edward to leave before he ruins anyone's lives. It was kind of creepy honestly." it was no great secret that most of my friends weren't crazy about Jake. He could be a little possessive. He didn't like me to go out with out him which usually wasn't an issue because I didn't go out. I was home with my kid at bed and bath time and usually dead asleep before the news came on. He never stayed over and I never stayed at his place. A physical relationship for us was a luxury that was reserved for the rare nights I actually accepted someone's offer to baby sit or Lilly stayed the night at someone's house. Another thing I never allowed was him playing father to Lilly. He wanted to do things like take her to the zoo and go out to dinner just the three of us but even after two years I wasn't comfortable with him having that role in Lilly's life. She knew that she didn't have a father and the last thing I needed was Jake confusing her.

"He worries about me. I am sure whatever he said was out of concern." I muttered. Em stared down at me. It was moments like this one where it sucked having friends so close they could see right through you.

"Is he still pressuring you about Lilly?" Damn Rose for telling her husband everything.

"Yeah. He wants us to go to the Zoo this weekend. I already told him no but he's persistent." I looked down at my shoes. Em lifted my chin so I had to look in his eyes.

"Bella I have never once meddled in your life or Lilly's but I care about both of you." I knew what was coming, it was the same thing Rose and Jasper had said a hundred times, "This thing with Jake is going to end badly. Something about him just isn't ok. End it now please before things get out of hand." I closed my eyes before I could cry. Em's concern was touching but I knew deep down Jake was harmless and wouldn't hurt me.

"Jake's just jealous. I'll explain it to him and he'll be fine." I wrapped my arms around his big burly body hugging him as tight as I could. He patted my back gently.

"Em I think I gotta nip this thing with Edward. I don't need him causing a fuss right now. It could be bad for us." By us I meant Lilly and I. There were things that Edward didn't need to know or had no right to know after vanishing for seven years. Em walked me back out to the counter and waved good bye. I decided to close up and pay Edward a little visit.

I sighed heavily and walked as slow as I could. I needed to figure out what I was going to do when I got there. What was I supposed to say? "Oh hey Edward. I can't believe you're still here! I thought you'd ran out of town again like a repeat of seven years ago.!" that wasn't going to work. I used the time to think it over and decided the best thing to do was just to tell the truth, well most of the truth and try to navigate the situation to see how long he was staying. It was still exactly nine minutes from his house to mine, even walking my slowest. I stood across the street when I heard it. A push lawn mower engine. It was coming from The Masen house. I closed my eyes, giving into a memory I had buried deep inside my head. I was thirteen, Edward had just turned fourteen. He was my friend since we were kids, little kids. His mother and my mother had been close before Renee passed away when I was three. Edward and I saw each other every day practically but it was only just before that summer started that I had started to see Edward differently. He was still my friend but he was starting to grow into his lanky limbs more, his abs and chest were filling out. Edward was starting to look hot. I was a late bloomer and was ashamed to admit that my friends had already had their first kisses and I hadn't. I was shy, awkward and more then a little bit of a tom boy. Edward seemed to be the only person that understood me. I was sure if I just laid it out for him straight he would do me a solid and kiss me so I could get it out of the way. It was dusk when he walked around the side of his house with the push mower. His shirt was off, his chest was sweaty. I marched myself across the street to his yard.

"Hey Swan, what's happenin?" I took his wrist, dragging him around to the secluded side of his house where we went to sneak beers at his parents parties. I knew we wouldn't be seen there. He followed behind me blindly until I pushed him up on the side of the house.

"Edward. I need a favor." I told him plainly. He looked down at me with wide eyes, "Uh ok. What is it? I have to finish mowing the lawn before my dad gets home." I hung my head in total shame that I was about to ask my friend for pity kiss instead of waiting for the real thing.

"It won't take long. I need you to kiss me. I know you kissed Tanya Denali, so don't tell me you don't know how." I stood up straighter, jutted my chin out and puckered up.

"Bella what the hell are you doing?" he asked.

"I'm waiting for you to kiss me damn it!" I demanded. He put his arm around my shoulders and started walking us back out into the open part of his front yard.

"Bella. You don't want your first kiss to be like this." he said.

"Like what?" I cocked my head to the side and waited for a better explanation.

"All forced and timed. It's not that I don't want to kiss you, I do but it should be.....nice." he was such a damn girl sometimes.

"Edward. It doesn't have to be nice. I just need it to be done with." I put my hands on my hips and waited. He smiled, "Sorry Swan. I'll kiss you but it's gonna be on my terms. Looks like you'll have to wait until I'm not covered in sweat and grass clippings." he turned away from me and walked back to his mower. I was right behind him, stomping the way only a rejected thirteen year old girl can.

"Hey Edward!" I said, he turned to face me and I pushed him right down on his ass then stomped home before he could see me cry.

Later that night I sat on my back deck waiting for Alice to come over to spend the night.

"Excuse me? Is this a private pity party or can anyone come?" Edward asked from my back gate.

"Go away Masen!" I yelled. I heard the gate open and latch behind him. He came over and sat down next to me. I rested my chin on my hand, refusing to look at him.

"I have a present for you if you'll look at me please." he sounded amused, the bastard. I looked up at him, he sat next to me in a rage against the machine tee shirt and khaki shorts, low cut converse one stars on his feet and a daisy in his hand. He held the flower out to me as a peace offering. I took it from him.

"Thanks. You didn't have to do that." I said glumly. He chuckled, "Yeah I did. I can't ask you to be my girl with a bad taste in your mouth." my eyes widened with shock over his words.

"Edward. You don't have to be my boyfriend. I just needed you to kiss me." I stammered.

"I want to be your boyfriend." he said simply. I was in total shock.

"What about Tanya?" I knew Tanya Denali was going to be pissed when she heard about this.

"Tanya's Tanya. You're you. I like you." he stood up and offered me his hand. My heart pounded in my chest.

"Swan are we gonna do this or not? I have to be home in fifteen minutes." I stood on wobbling knees and walked to the center of my back yard with him. He put his hands on my shoulders and very slowly inclined his head. It felt like a year before his lips touched mine but when they did a million tiny fireworks went off behind my eye lids. He pulled back and looked down at me. A huge smile broke out across my face.

"So are you my girlfriend?" he said just above a whisper. Night crickets sang around us. Lightening bugs glowed around our faces.

"Yes." I said timidly.

"Good. I'll come see you tomorrow." he walked back to my gate. I looked down at my daisy still clutched in my hand.

"Edward wait!" I called to him. He turned to me, a dumb grin plastered all over his angels face. I ran to him and wrapped my arms around his neck. He hugged my waist tightly and let me go.

"Thanks for being my first kiss." I murmured. He blushed, "Thanks for being my first girlfriend." I of course waited until I was sure he was almost back to his house before I did the happy dance of joy right there in my back yard. Edward came around the side of his house pushing the mower with the engine off. I tried not to let the sweet memory i'd allowed into my mind to change anything. I stomped across the street. Edward looked at me with wide eyes. He pulled the ipod headphones from his ears and smiled.

"We need to talk." I announced. He nodded, "I agree. Would you like to come inside?" he jerked his head in the direction of the house.

"No. I don't want to distrub you're mother. Why are you still here?" I was trying to be civil. I was trying to remember that we both had neighbors and anyone that heard us fighting would make it town gossip before the sun went down.

"I stayed to help my mom." his answer was simple and direct. If he thought I was buying that horse shit for a minute he was so wrong.

"Edward, I can't make you go back to New York but please don't go around town asking my friends questions about me. It's not fair to me and it's not fair to put them in the middle." I was trying not to look at him and he was trying not to look at me. It was sad and awkward all at once. This is what our break up might have been like if he had stayed.

"I know. I'm sorry I did that to Em. I just have so many questions and no answers." his voice was as sad as his eyes, "Bella I'm sorry I hurt you. I'm sorry I left." I squeezed my eyes shut tight and choked back tears. This wasn't what I expected when I'd come here.

"Edward, I accept your apology. I hope it makes things easier for you to think you're forgiven but I've worked really hard to make a good life for myself and I don't need anything complicating that." it took all my self control not to hug him. He looked so sad. He reminded me briefly of the boy I'd loved seven years ago before everything fell apart. That boy I knew inside and out. The man standing before me I didn't know at all.

"I just have one question that I need an answer for." I knew what he was going to ask and I was ready to give him my answer.

"Ok shoot." I replied. He took a deep breath, "Who is Lilly's father?" I took a deep breath and answered, "She doesn't have one." I looked directly into his eyes when I said it. It was the same thing I told Lilly every time she asked. Edward looked confused, "Then who's is she?" he asked. I smiled wide and proudly declared, "She's nobody's baby but mine." With that I turned and left him standing in the autumn air. I went home and hugged my baby tight before I made dinner for Lilly, Dad and I.

A/n- You guys rock my world! I love getting reviews and you guys have really out done yourselves.

I hope you enjoy the chapter and the direction it's going. Again thanks so much for all the awesome reviews! (This wasn't edited. I know I suck.)


	4. Chapter 4

Real A/n is at the bottom:

This a little insight into Edward's family. Read ON!

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, just wish I did.

_Elizabeth Masen~_

I stood over the sink washing the dishes from dinner.

"Hey Mom, I'm going out with Em. I won't be to late." he kissed my cheek and hurried out the door. My handsome boy, My baby. The reason that all those years ago I stayed.

I was pregnant with Edward when she came to me and told me she was pregnant too. I knew that there had been others but not someone I knew. I had always chalked it up to us getting married so young. My closest friends , Renee Swan and Esme Cullen, said he needed a cold hard dose of reality. I always said I could never leave him. He would grow out of it someday and when he did, we'd be happy. I didn't know that during that time I'd get pregnant. I had to think of more then just myself. I knew now I had to leave. I told him I wanted to go home to Chicago and be with the people that loved me because it was clear that he didn't. How could he say he did after what he'd done? I was packing to leave as he sobbed into his hands that he was so sorry. He loved me, he loved us.

"It was a stupid mistake Elizabeth." he cried. I shoved more things in a suit case, my belly constantly getting in the way.

"You're damn right it was stupid." I growled.

"I'll make this right. I'll do anything just please don't leave. We were going to be a family, remember? You and me and little Edward. We can still have that." I listened to his pleas. I shouldn't of. I stopped short of the door with my over night bag in my hand. I needed to walk away, my brain knew it but my heart was his, even after he broke it.

"You'll do anything?" I repeated his words. He walked over and turned me to him, "Yes. God, yes. I'll do anything just don't leave." I had an opportunity here. I could keep what was mine and protect my baby from the truth.

"You must never see her again. You will provide for the child of course but no one can ever know what you've done. This town is small and if we intend to stay here we have to protect our name for Edward's sake." I didn't look at him. I could feel his stare on my back. He was thinking.

"This isn't a negation Edward Masen. That's the deal or I'm leaving." He grabbed my arm.

"Ok. How are we going to do this? Should we move?" he asked. I shook my head, "No. I'm not moving. This was your error in judgment and I refuse to pay for it anymore then I already am." I sat down on our bed where he wouldn't be sleeping for a very very long time.

"Child support. Tell her anything you want. Give her anything she wants just make sure she stays quiet. I won't have a scandal." I spat at him.

"So if I fix this you'll stay. I'll still have my family?" his voice shook with hope and sadness all at once. I had no idea what he was feeling. I didn't much care at the time.

"It has to stay fixed. If I hear one peep around town about this _situation_ I will take Edward and leave." Edward nodded that he understood. In the end he paid for her silence, I never asked how much, and he paid child support until the child was eighteen. I had no idea that even after her husband had left her she would stay in town. It was an almost constant strain on our marriage. I wished daily that we had moved away from here. Seeing the child grow up before my very eyes. Having Edward count the child among his nearest and dearest friends sent cold chills down my spine. So many times Edward had gotten so unintentionally close to the truth. When he was sixteen and wanted his drivers permit I didn't get him his birth certificate fast enough. He went looking for it himself and found the lock box with all our important documents. The deed to the house, bank account information. My will, Edward's will and both of their birth certificates. I didn't understand why Edward Sr insisted he needed a copy of it. I always wondered if maybe it was kept as a reminder of his mistake, a way to keep history from repeating it's self. When I found him trying to pick the lock I almost had a heart attack. Soon after that it was time for him to start applying to colleges and I saw my opportunity. I knew I had to get him out of here. One night when he was out with his friends I brought the solution to our problems up to his father.

"It's the perfect solution. Edward will go to school back east and we will sell the house and leave. We won't have to worry anymore." To me it was the perfect solution to an unwanted seventeen year old unwanted problem.

"What about my practice?" He said. I couldn't understand why he was fighting me on this. It was the perfect exit.

"You can start a new practice or retire. We have more then enough money to live off of. Edward's college is paid for. We could start over completely." I was almost pleading with him. When Edward left there wouldn't be anything holding us here. Edward sighed, "Have you thought about Bella and Edward? I don't think this is a fly by night thing. I think they're in love, Liz. He's going to come back here for her eventually." I shook my head and laughed, "Edward it's puppy love. He will go away to college and see the light. He can't possibly think this is all there is of the world." I rolled my eyes at him.

"Liz I am telling you, he can go to school on the moon and he will still come back here for that girl." I brushed his comment off with a wave of my hand, "As soon as he's gone and settled in he will see the light. He won't come back here. I'll make sure of it." I stood my ground. I wanted out of Forks. I wanted out of the whole damn state of Washington.

"It's not right. What if she's the one for him? What if we are ruining both of their lives?" he said. I shook my head, "Somethings are more important than love." I said and the conversation was over. I didn't know about all his stolen moments with Bella in the woods. I didn't know how deep the love between them ran. I thought they were two stupid teenagers that would break up when they both went away to school. When Edward had gone I felt like I was one foot out the door. His father and I had planned to go to Europe while the house was on the market and when it sold we'd come back long enough to collect our things and leave for good. It broke my heart the first full day Edward was away and he called home almost in tears because he was homesick and missing Bella.

"Edward honey this is all part of growing up. You should be grateful for the gifts you've been given! You're smart and handsome. You're going to go to medical school and do great things." I said as brightly and energetically as I could.

"Mom, I miss her. I feel like I cant breath without her." I closed my eyes tight. I could see Edward clearly in my mind on the verge of tears.

"Honey, that was a high school romance. You should take this time to see other people." I heard Edward gasp, "I love her! I don't want anyone else! Neither does she!" he was getting upset with me. I kept telling myself that I had to push him away to keep him safe.

"I am sure right now this feels like the end of the world. I know it's hard but you have to see the world a little. It's a big place and trust me, there's more to life then Forks." I said.

"But Mom, I love her." his voice cracked and so did my heart.

"Why don't you try being up there just for a little while with out calling anyone here. Go out with your room mates, make some new friends, maybe see the sites a little. You are in New York city for crying out loud." I was a horrible mother. I was th mother that pushed her son away from the people he loved so she could protect herself. I was truly selfish.

"Ok Mom I'll try. I'll call you tomorrow night, ok?" he said. The phone calls nightly between us went on for about a week and then became gradually less frequent until they stopped almost all together. I knew when he had broken up with Bella by letter. It was regrettable that it had come on her birthday.

It was later, right as the house went into contract to sell that Edward Sr heard she was pregnant. The rumor mill said she was due on Memorial day, May thirty first, two thousand and two. Counting back words it was a perfect nine months to the day that Edward had left Forks. Her father never came to us looking for anything. Bella never said it was my son's baby.

"We have no proof it's Edwards! We don't know what was going on with those kids. Maybe she was sleeping around on him?" I screeched.

"Oh come on! You know that's not true. Her mother was your best friend, have some fucking respect. That baby didn't do anything wrong and it deserves a father!" he screamed. I balled my fists up at my sides.

"My baby deserves a future too! I got him out of here and you are not going to drag him back here for a baby that probably isn't even his!" I screamed.

"We are not leaving Forks! I can't make Edward come back here but I'll be damned if I miss seeing my grandchild." he yelled in a booming voice. He pointed to the front door, his face flush with rage, " If you want to leave fine, I wont stop you this time but I won't let you take this from me." he stomped upstairs and slammed the bedroom door. I sat down on the couch with the cordless phone in my hands. I made a decision. I would let fate decide how this should be handled. If he answered I would tell him everything, hell I'd even buy him the ticket home but if he didn't answer then I would never say anything to him about it again. I dialed the phone slowly and listened to it ring, with every pause my heart beat faster. On the tenth ring his voice mail picked up. I didn't leave a message. Fate had decided. Edward Sr decided he would have any role in Lilly Swan's life that Bella would allow. He never asked her directly if our son was the father but he really didn't have too. She had Edward's eyes. He visited her frequently but I never went along. Seeing her was a painful reminder of choices I made to protect the ones I loved the most. I didn't deserve to be a part of her life.

I think he knew his time here was almost over. The reason that I think this is because he changed his will two weeks before he died. He changed it to include his other child, Edward's half sibling. The child would now inherit a third of his considerable net worth as well as a trust fund upon turning thirty. It was his final act of betrayal. He also included Lilly Swan, he granted her a college education and a small monthly allowance that would start upon his death. He left all of it up to lawyers of course. He wanted to make sure I couldn't alter his wishes in anyway. Even in death he was determined to tell Edward the truth. I mourned my husband, my love. The man I had stood by even after he cheated on me and impregnated another woman but what I mourned for more were the wasted years without my son. If I had known that in the end his father was going to ruin everything I wouldn't of pushed him away so long ago.

A/n- Ok guys first of all, you make me swoon with your reviews. Seriously had a big dumb grin all day. The next chapter will be Edward getting his balls busted by Rose. I hope this chapter explained some things and maybe will make it easier for us all to forgive him a little. Review Review Review!


	5. Chapter 5 PLEASE READ!

_A/n- I wanted to apologize for the original chapter 5 you all read. I had two chapter fives. I didn't realize I had posted the wrong one until I started getting some semi-negative reviews. I checked and it turns out I put up the wrong one. This one is different, a lot longer and I am really proud of it. So please re read this chapter and review again. I hope this one is better received. _

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.

_Edward~_

The parking lot was crowded when I pulled in. I had forgotten there wasn't much else to do in Forks for the over twenty one crowd. I walked in searching the room for Emmett. One face stood out among the rest, Rosie Hale. I still couldn't believe Emmett had married Jasper's twin sister. Something about that was odd but right at the same time. Growing up, Rose was the center of attention most of the time. She was a drama queen and a princess but people were just naturally drawn to her. Most of the time even Jasper took a back seat to his twin. She was one of my best friends and she was still one of the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. In New York I'd met models and actresses but Rose could put them all to shame. I watched her for a moment behind the bar opening beers and filling mugs with frosty beer as she smiled and made polite conversation with the locals. Em waved me over to the end of the bar so I could stop lingering in the door way. I took the stool next to him, he was smiling as usual.

"What should I say to her?" I asked him. Em smiled, "Well there isn't a lot you can say that won't make her pissed off. I'd start with 'hi'." I walked over to the empty section of the counter where Rose was washing glasses. "Hi Rose. It's been a long time." I smiled as big as I could. She looked up for a moment, "I'm sorry about your Dad. He was a hell of a guy." she said. My smile dimmed, "Thank you." I said. "Now get the hell out of my bar." she pointed to the door but kept moving behind the bar.

"Come on Rosie. I want to talk to you." I was prepared to beg if necessary. Em walked up beside me, "Rose please, the guy is dyin here. Just talk to him for a minute." Em was doing his best to help me. I hoped he wasn't going to be in trouble later.

"No." Rose walked to the far end of the bar and cleaned up the napkins and empty bottles.

"Please, for me?" Em walked behind the bar, kissing her cheek and smiling in his big goofy way.

"Fine damn it. You and me in my office now." she spat.

Rose led me down a narrow hallway back into an office just past the bathrooms. She opened the door motioning for me to go first. I walked in the room, head slightly down ready for the verbal beat down I was about to receive.

"I don't know what the hell you think you're playing at but the game is done Edward." she said. Rose was the one among us that was always first to guard and protect the one's she loved. Her stance was protective and fierce. She looked directly into my eyes. She wasn't backing down.

"What game, Rose?" I asked her. I stood before her, my arms limp at my sides, ready to take the beating she was going to give. I'd earned it.

"The game where you waltz in here like the town fucking hero and expect everyone to just forget what you did!" she shouted. I shut my eyes tight exhaling slowly.

"I'm sorry Rose. I never meant to hurt anyone." I had to make her understand.

"Is that a joke? You're sorry? Do you have idea what you've done around here?" I knew that her telling me what kind of pain I'd caused, especially to Bella, would probably bring on more pain then I was ready for.

"Tell me what I've done. Make me feel as bad as I've made everyone else feel if that's what you need to do but Rose I am sorry. I know what I did to Bella was awful and I know that coming into town and deciding to stay wasn't a part of anyone's plans but I'm here and I want to make things right." I told her. Rose's nostrils flared. Her lips were a tight line over her teeth. I didn't know if she was searching for the right words or if she was going to go inside and leave me out here alone. She turned as if to walk away but turned back around suddenly. Her open hand flew at my face and connected with a stinging smack.

"You think one 'I'm sorry' is going to fix seven years worth of damage? You hurt the people I love the most. Jasper was devastated when the book came out and you reduced him to no more than your ever faithful lap dog. The pain you caused Bella I wouldn't wish on my own worst enemy. She was dead inside Edward. She was lost. She didn't smile. There was no light in her eyes and you think you can walk back into her life, into Jasper's life and just say sorry and everything is supposed to be ok? It doesn't work that way." I knew what she said was true. I rubbed the sore spot on my cheek where she'd slapped me.

"I know that. I know that the words don't make anything alright. I am going to go to Jasper and prove I'm sorry." I told her. She snorted out a strangled laugh, "He doesn't want an apology Edward. You can't undo what you've done. He was your best friend and you abandoned him. No phone calls. No letters, oh wait I take that back. You did write one letter didn't you? Tell me Edward what was the basis for that decision? Did you know that would become apart of the epic novel or were you just a fucking chicken shit?" her eyes never left my face. I knew when I'd come here that it would be an epic tongue lashing. I knew this was going to hurt.

"I wrote the letter because I couldn't do it over the phone. I didn't want to do it " the memory of writing that letter still hurt. For weeks I more or less curled up and let the misery have me. I remembered all the teary phone calls home. I was so depressed and home sick all the time. My mother was insistent that I get out and do things. When I'd ask about Bella and my friends she would say they were fine and wished me well. She said everything was moving right as it had been when I was here. I got the feeling like they didn't need me. So I did what my mom said. I went out, attempted to make friends and then the last call came. I had fallen in love with New York and wanted to come home at the end of semester and convince Bella to come back with me. My mother told me it was cruel to make her choose between Charlie and me. She told me the kind thing to do was to let Bella go, so I did. By the end of the first year it was easier and I just never came back. I'd ask about her from time to time and when I did my mother told me she'd moved on. She told me she was happy and fine. She never mentioned anything about a kid that has my eyes and Bella's smile.

"Then why did you do it?" she yelled. I flinched back on instinct.

"My parents thought it was for the best. Not that it changes anything. The decision to do it was still mine." I wasn't going to blame my parents for what I'd done. My mother may have encouraged me to let Bella go but it was still my choice to make.

"If you could do that to her so easily then you never loved her in the first place. You fed her lies for years. Lied to her about how you'd get married and give her everything she'd ever dreamed of. You fed her all your pretty little lies and then when she needed you the most you dumped her in a letter. You tossed her a side like trash. She always felt like she wasn't good enough for you and that letter just confirmed all her worst fears." she screamed. The whole town could probably hear her. "You are an arrogant, self centered, selfish prick who doesn't deserve to be a father. You should just go back-" I was pulled out of her rant by one word, father. Had it just happened? Did Rose just confirm all my suspicions in one conversation?

"What?" I said to her. She stopped yelling for a moment, her face told me she knew what she had said and was trying to back track. "What did you just say?" I asked her. She attempted to push past me.

"Rose you said I don't deserve to be a father. Am I father?" I asked her. My heart slammed in my rib cage. Her answer could change everything. She reared back and slapped me across the face again, just as hard as before.

"Stay away from Bella and Lilly." Rose turned on her heel and went back into the bar. I rubbed the sore spot on my cheek. I stood in the empty office in shock. I was a father. The truth of that was becoming more and more clear every moment I stayed in Forks. Why had no one told me? Why had everyone kept this from me for seven years? I needed answers and since I had only talked to one person for the last seven years I knew where to start, my mother.

I was still stunned walking into my mothers house. How could they keep this from me all this time? Why had they done it? I wanted answers. My mother was still up when I came in the house. As usual there was paper work scattered all over the kitchen table. As I walked in she was attempting to clean it up.

"I thought you went out." she plastered a fake smile on her face.

"I was out. I just got done talking to Rosalie Hale. She told me something pretty interesting." I balled my fists up inside my pockets. I was trying not to let my anger get the best of me. I didn't want to be the hot headed little kid she knew. I wanted to be the man I should have been for seven years. She scooped all her paper work into a pile and picked it up. In her other hand she carried her coffee mug to the sink.

"All gossip I'm sure..." her tone was uninterested. She put her papers down on the counter, close to her as always. The water turned on, she began rinsing out her coffee mug.

"I don't think this is gossip. Did you know I'm Lilly Swan's father?" the crash of her coffee mug hitting the sink was the loudest sound I'd ever heard in our house.

"Edward, I can explain.." she was calm. How could she be calm right now?

"You kept me away for seven years. You told me my friends and my girl had moved on." I didn't want to look at her but I couldn't look away. She was my only source for answers and if she turned and left me here now I might never know the truth.

"They did move on. Bella's dating Jacob Black. How do you know the baby isn't his? How do you know she was faithful to you?" I never once questioned if Bella was unfaithful to me before it all ended. I wouldn't start playing that game now.

"Bella would of never cheated on me. We wanted to get married! We wanted to start a family! For the last seven years I could have had that but you lied to me. You made it seem like they didn't want me, like you didn't want me." I wanted to scream and yell and hit things.

"I wanted you to have a life that was worthy of you. I didn't want you running back here to take care of that tramp and a baby that probably isn't even yours." she yelled. I closed my eyes tight, My image of Lilly in the window came into my mind.

"Do not ever call the mother of my daughter a tramp again. You will have absolutely nothing but the utmost respect for her from now on." whatever happened between Bella and I, I wouldn't let my mother degrade her.

"That little girl may not be yours!" she demanded.

"She looks just like me. She's the perfect image of Bella and I together. Have you seen her?" I wondered if my mother had said or done something to keep Bella from contacting me. Why had she never contacted me for support, especially after my book was published and I could more then afford it.

"Yes I've seen her. I haven't spent time with her. Your father on the other hand." I narrowed my eyes at her. It was no wonder she never let me speak to him on the rare occasion I did call home. She didn't want him telling me.

"Dad knew about her?" I asked. My mother lowered her gaze to the empty coffee cup in the sink.

"Knew about her....spent time with her....he was at every birthday, every holiday. He went to see Bella in the hospital the day Lilly was born." her voice was a whisper. She knew it was all over.

"What was the date?" I began to pace a line back and fourth in front of the island.

"Lilly Swan was born May thirty first two thousand and two." Bella lied to me. She said Lilly's birthday was in July. My parents house was up for sale in may of two thousand and two. They wanted to leave Forks. My dad had planned to retire. She told me they were looking in Arizona.

"Is she why you stayed in Forks?"

"I wanted to leave. I never thought she was yours. I still don't. It was your father that got all upset about it and said we had to stay here." it was all so clear but fuzzy around the edges. I felt like there was more to this but I didn't care at the moment. I just wanted to know why they had done this to me.

"How could you do this to me? I am your son mom! I loved Bella with all my heart. She was my world. Do you know what she must think of me? I left her Mom, I left for seven years. I left her all alone to raise our baby alone." I yelled. The tight grip on my temper faded. I wasn't ashamed to yell at her after what she'd done.

"Bella isn't blameless in this you know. She knew where you were. She could of come to us and asked for your number or your address but she didn't. So don't stand here and blame me while poor sweet sainted Bella roams the streets with her boyfriend while your 'daughter' sleeps. If you want to blame anyone for this mess blame her." I couldn't stand another minute in this house. I walked away from my mother. My own flesh and blood that had done this to me. I got back in the car, I had one friend here and one friend only. I could only pray Emmett was still at the bar.

The parking lot was more crowded than before. I pushed open the door to the bar harder than necssary. I wanted more information. I wanted to know more about my daughter. Was she ok? Did she have a lot of friends? Was she stubborn like Bella? What were her likes and dislikes? Em was still sitting at the end of the bar where I'd left him. Jasper had taken the seat beside him.

"Rose I need to talk to you." she leaned on the bar, her eyes were red as if she'd been crying.

"Edward, I think I've said enough for one night." her voice cracked. I hadn't seen Rose cry often, not even as a child. The secret she accidentally told must have been a very valued one.

"Please, just talk to me for two minutes. I have so many questions." I took a step closer to the bar. Jasper stood up between me and the bar.

"She said no." his voice was low and I could smell the jack on his breath. I groaned, "Jasper god damn it, can we put aside the you and me shit for second. I just found out I'm a father and I need answers." I yelled over the music. I attempted to push past him to talk to Rose. He pushed me back.

"You are not going anywhere near Bella and Lilly!" Jasper screamed.

"Watch me!" I walked to the door, I had every intention of going to Bella's house and demanding answers.

"Jasper NO!" Em screamed. I turned to see what was the matter. The last thing I saw was Jasper's fist connecting with my jaw. I staggered back two steps. He met those two steps and punched me again. On instinct I covered my face with my arms. He punched me in the ribs. It knocked the wind from me, I fell to the ground. He came down on top of me like a ton of bricks. He managed to get one good hard cracking punch in before Em pulled him off me.

"Somebody call the chief!" a patron yelled. I laid on the dirty bar floor panting. My lips were busted, I could taste the blood in my mouth. With every breath I took my ribs ached but what I was more worried about was seeing Chief Swan.

I sat on the bar stool with ice on my jaw. Deputy Mike Newton was asking me questions regarding the incident while we waited on the chief to arrive.

"Are you ok?" Em asked me. I nodded, "I'm fine." I took the ice away and opened my mouth. My jaw was bruised and swollen and my lips were busted, already starting to swell. Deputy Mike excused himself to go fill in Chief Swan. I shuddered at the thought of talking to Bella's father. He probably thought I deserved worse. I knew I deserved worse. He walked in the bar with the same heir of importance I remembered from my childhood.

"Edward, you pressin charges on the Hale kid?" he asked. His voice was grumble as always. He read over the notes Mike had made without looking at me.

"No Sir. I asked for it." I said clearly so everyone could hear me. Rose stopped what she was doing, her mouth gaping.

"You're sure? This is assault. It's serious." Charlie said.

"Yes sir. I'm sure. I deserved worse." I stood off my stool and dropped my ice on the bar. Charlie looked over the forming bruise.

"Yes you did." he seemed almost sorry it wasn't broken. "Mike, put Hale in the drunk tank for the night, let him sleep it off." he signed off on the notes handing them back to Mike.

"Um Sir? I'd really appreciate it if you didn't take him in. I'll drive him home myself." I said to him. He looked at me like I was an idiot.

"He beat the crap out of you and you want to drive him home?" he asked in disbelief.

"It's the least I could do sir." Charlie knew what I meant. He ordered his deputy to let Jasper get in my car. I fished my keys from my pocket waving goodnight to Rose and Em.

Jasper fought Mike about getting in my car but Charlie had the final word, "Jasper Hale get your ass in that car before I lock you up." the drive home was totally silent. I drove him the very short distance to his parents old house and cut the engine off. Jasper tried to get out of the car by himself but he was to wasted. I went around to the passenger side, slung his arm over my shoulder and carried him in the house. I unlocked the front door noticing how everything was the same. The same table by the door. Jasper and Rose's pictures still hung on the walls. I took Jasper into the living room and dumped him on the couch. I worried for a moment he might vomit and thought about turning him on his side. He rolled over before I got the chance.

"I really missed you, you fuckin prick." he said. I laughed for the first time in days.

"I missed you too, you sorry piece of shit. You hit like a girl." I told him. He gave me the finger. I let out a laugh and left him to sleep it off. Hopefully we were ok now that he'd beat the hell out of me.

My jaw was sore. My lips were busted and blood had dried on my face. My ribs were sore from the punch but not broken. I didn't know where to go or what to do. I couldn't go see Bella like this. I didn't want her to see me this way. Around the corner from Jasper's house was Bella's. I left my car parked in front of Jasper's and just started walking. The night air was cold, it smelled like at any moment it would rain. I had missed the smell. The word daughter kept running through my mind. Every fiber of my being told me she was mine. I had so much to make up for. Missed birthdays and Christmas's. I had missed everything, her first words, first steps, first day of school. I was getting ahead of myself. I was stupid to think that Bella would allow me to make up for lost time. I didn't deserve to be in her life. I wanted to try though, even if Bella wouldn't actually allow me to have the title of Lilly's father, even if that was a role that another man filled for her I still wanted to be apart of Lilly's life on some level. It was a strange feeling to miss her when I didn't even know her. Before I realized where I was my steps as if on instinct carried me to Bella's house. I walked down the narrow path between Bella's yard and what use to be Lauren Mallory's yard. I jiggled the gate to her back yard, it was still loose. I didn't know why I opened it and went inside. Seven years ago I would climbed the trelis and crawled in bed with her. That was when we made all our best plans. So many nights we laid in her too small bed talking about our future. When I became a big shot doctor and she became a world famous chef we were going to get married and buy this huge old colonial house on maple street. We knew what colors we wanted each room to be. We knew what kind of wedding we wanted. We also knew that even if we never had two dimes to rub together as long as we had each other we'd be fine. Her bedroom light was off and the window was closed. Her yard was the same except for the big wooden swing set. Her back fence still lined the edge of the woods where we use to go to be alone. There was a meadow there. It was grassy and green with little wild flowers here and there. The tree branches made a canopy that shielded us from the rain but let the right amount of sunlight or moon light in. I walked slowly backwards from Bella's window. I didn't take my eyes off it until I reached the edge of the fence. I hopped it looking deep into the woods for a moment. There use to be a path. It was the middle of night and there was no light to show me the way. I needed to find my place, our place, the last place we knew when we were in love. It was likely the place our daughter was conceived. If that was true I was glad because no two people could of asked for a more perfect moment then the one we shared there. I swept my foot across the brush, the leafs and dirt moved away. I saw the beginning of the dirt path.

After the first few steps my memory took over and I knew my way. It wasn't a straight shot by any means. As kids Bella and I had used tress as markers along the way. The same trees were still there. It felt like forever that I walked in the woods just me, my thoughts and my too many questions with no answers. My entire being was confused. Part of me wanted to cry. I wanted to lay down and sob for everything I'd done, everyone I'd hurt and all the years I missed with Lilly and my father. Another part of me was glad that my father stood up to my mother and refused to move. He was with Lilly even when I wasn't. I was grateful to him for that. My relationship with my mother would never be the same after tonight. She'd kept to many secrets and pushed me away for some unknown reason. I was overwhelmed, confused, sad, happy. Lost in my thoughts I kept walking until I found the edge of the meadow. It was still beautiful. I walked in, looking around. I was happy to see this place was the same. I was tired. I just wanted a moment to collect my thoughts. I laid down under the canopy of the tree branches. I stared up into the dark leafs. There were no answers here, only comfort and memories. I laid my arms out my sides and took a deep breath before the rain came. As it rained I laid in it letting the drops that made there way through the leafs wash over my face. I had nothing left to do tonight so I laid in the rain.


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: I don't own twilight.

_Bella~_

It wasn't even seven in the morning when my cell phone started ringing. Lilly was brushing her teeth for school before breakfast while I made her some eggs. My dad had left. Usually the only time he had to get up at night for work is when there was an accident or a really bad fight at the bar. When I was a kid I worried on the rare occasion when he had to leave in the night. I still worried.

"Grandpas home!" Lilly screamed. It was to early for her to have so much energy. She ran, flung open the front door and bounced in place waiting for my dad to make his way into the house.

"Hello Ladies!" Dad said to us. He scooped Lilly up. She showed him her boots and headband. He made a big deal over them even though he had no idea what she was talking about when she mentioned the words, style or Latest fashion. He kissed her forehead and sat her down at the table to a wait her breakfast. We tried to eat breakfast together every morning.

"Rough night?" I asked. I put Lilly's eggs on her plate along with half a banana and a piece of wheat toast. I made the same plate for dad. He looked less pleased. He didn't like the healthy eating that started in this house after Lilly went on solid foods. I wouldn't let her eat crap but I knew when I wasn't looking dad snuck her junk.

"There was a fight at Black's last night. Some one called it in so I had go check it out." he grumbled and opened his paper.

"Everyone ok?" I asked while pouring juice for everyone.

"Jasper beat the hell out of Edward." he didn't look up from his paper. I stood mouth gaping, juice pitcher in hand.

"Grandpa said a bad word. He has to put a quarter in the jar." Lilly announced. He fished one from his pocket and laid it on the table.

"It's not nice to tattle, squirt." he told her. She shrugged and went back to eating.

"Why?" I wondered. Dad shrugged, "Don't rightly know. Edward wouldn't press charges." I poured my dad some juice and handed it to him, "I was real shocked. Usually the city folks are real quick to scream assault but not Edward. Wouldn't even let me put Jasper in the drunk tank. Drove him home himself." I sat down at the other end of the table, "Why would he do that?" I asked my dad. He turned the page of his paper, "Edward said he had it coming."

"It's not nice to hit, Right grandpa?" Lilly piped in.

"Right Baby." I chimed in.

"Unless they really deserved it." Dad said.

"Dad!" I shot him a look and looked over at Lilly. I wanted him to quickly fix this before she got the wrong idea.

"Uh what I meant was you shouldn't hit. You should use your words and Uncle Jasper was wrong." he put his paper aside and ate his breakfast. Lilly seemed satisfied with his answer and ate quietly until it was time for school.

I dropped Lilly off then headed straight to the coffee house. We opened every day by eight and closed at five. Alice thought I should hire some more staff and stay open later but I really couldn't afford it. I couldn't believe Jasper had beat up Edward. What was more disturbing then them fighting was the fact that I cared. Ever since Edward said he was staying in town I was torn between being curious as to his motives and being pissed off he was disrupting my life. I pulled to the back entrance of the coffee house. All the lights were already on and the chairs were taken down from the tables. Rose and Alice were sitting deep in a quiet conversation at the counter.

"Um morning guys. What's going on?" I said. I stuck my purse and laptop under the counter as usual.

"Bella something happened last night." Alice said in a low voice. "What's wrong? Is this about the fight last night?" I asked her. I worried she was upset about Jasper hitting Edward and making an ass of himself. Rose wasn't just working at Black's, she was trying to buy it. Billy Black had agreed to let her work off the down payment and then he would sell it to her. It had been in there family for a long time and he wanted it ran just a certain way. Rose had been busting her ass to do everything right. I hoped Jasper and Edward didn't ruin that for her. I looked between the two of them, there faces were so serious. It wasn't normal. They looked as if someone had died.

"How much did your Dad tell you?" Alice asked me. I shrugged, "Not a lot. Jasper hit him and Edward didn't fight back. I can't believe he drove him though, that's so bizarre." I shook my head in disbelief again. Why in the hell would Edward let Jasper beat him up and then drive him home. The "I had it coming" answer didn't make any sense to me. They looked at each other briefly, they were having some sort of a silent conversation. I watched them carefully while I flipped on the coffee makers and my cappuccino machine.

"Guys you're scaring me." I told them. Rose stood up offering me her hand, "Bella. Come sit with us." she said.

"No. what's going on? How bad is it?" I was going to start freaking out if one of them didn't say something soon.

"I know why Edward didn't fight back." Rose was shaking from head to toe. It looked like she was going to cry any minute.

"Rose are you okay?" it had been a long time since I'd seen her so upset

"No, I'm not. Oh god Bella I fucked up. I fucked up so bad and it's going to hurt you. I never meant too." she wiped her eyes

"Bell's, you need to sit down, please." Alice pleaded. I shook my head, "No. whatever it is I'll take the news standing." Rose stood up and came around the counter, Alice followed her.

"Bella I would never ever do anything to hurt you. Neither of us would." she said. Her voice was low, she was trying to be soothing. The longer this went on the worse it was becoming. There was only one thing that could be as bad as they were making it seem.

"Bella, Edward came in the bar last night. We argued and I said something I shouldn't of." Alice slipped her hand inside mine as Rose spoke. Sweat broke out over my forehead and the back of my neck, "Rose what did you do?" I asked her before the tears started, I already knew.

"I accidentally told Edward he's Lilly's father." she said with tears running down her face. My knees buckled. Two sets of hands went out to stop me before I hit the floor.

"How could you? Rose, he's successful and rich. He could take her from me. I could lose my baby! How could you do this to me?" I shook off there hands and grabbed my purse.

"Where are you going?" Alice yelled.

"I'm going to go get Lilly and run! He can't have her. She's mine." I took off at a run to my car. They were right behind me. I was only sure of one thing at this point, he would never take my baby from me. Alice threw her tiny body between the door and myself.

"Okay guys let's calm down. Things may not be as bad as they seem." Alice always the voice of reason.

"May not be as bad as they seem? He could take her from me Alice! I don't know him anymore. I don't know what he's capable of!" I screamed. Rose cried harder, "Bella I am so sorry. I'd never hurt you for anything. We were arguing and it just came out." I paced back and fourth, my arms wrapped tight around my rib cage. "Bella we can fix this." Alice said. She stood between Rose and I.

"How in the hell can we fix this?" Rose asked.

"Edward is reasonable. I am sure if you just explain things to him he will understand." Alice smiled, trying to make me believe her statement.

"I can't let him see her. When he leaves again it will crush her. I won't let her feel that kind of pain." I said. It was a rare moment that I let the pain of his departure seep into my being. I wouldn't let my daughter feel that.

"Bell's what if he stays?" Alice asked me. My head shot up, my eyes narrowed, "Are you out of your mind? He's never going to stay here." I scoffed at her question.

"He might. Bella you haven't seen him. Em said when they were at lunch yesterday, he said Lilly's name. Em said it was like Edward's whole being just came to life. What if he stayed for her?" Rose asked me. I shook my head, "He won't. He has no place in Lilly's life." I told them.

"I didn't have a dad. I never really minded but Bella, Lilly deserves so much better. What if Edward would stay here? What if he loves her?" Alice asked.

"He doesn't even know her!" I told them, I groaned.

"Bella I am so sorry." Rose said again, "I slapped him twice if that helps." she offered. I thought it over, "Thanks. It kind of does."

I went about my morning in the most normal way I could. I made conversation with the regulars, got the normal to go orders ready and smiled the whole time. Inside I was scared. I was scared that he would try and take her from me if I didn't let him see her. Edward's finical means were much larger than mine I was sure. Also the fact that for seven years I had a phone number and an address where at any time I could have written or called him to tell him about Lilly wasn't going to help my case either. I ignored the ring of the front door assuming it was just another customer. I kept my eyes down while loading the dishwasher.

"Hello Bella." Edward's voice sent shivers down my spine. All the little hairs on the back of my neck stood up. I turned to face him and saw his jaw first. His once perfect beautifully sculpted jaw was bruised black and blue. His lips were busted and swollen.

"Edward..." I pointed slightly to his jaw. He smiled for a moment before the pain hit his lips, "Yeah I guess we can all see Jasper's review of my book." I had to laugh a little at Edward standing before me bruised and busted but still making a joke.

"Can I get you something?" I said.

"I actually just stopped in to see you. I was wondering if we could have a drink tonight. I know it's forward but there isn't much else to do and we really need to talk." I nodded in agreement with his statement. The sooner this was done with the better. "I'm free tonight. Is seven OK?" I said. He nodded solemnly.

"Then it's settled." I said reluctantly

"What the hell? Are you just going to randomly be here now?" Jake asked from the kitchen doorway. I had asked him repeatedly to use the front door but he refused. It was really starting to get on my nerves.

"Good morning Jake. How are you?" Edward asked him nicely. Jake placed an overly protective arm around my shoulder.

"I would be a whole lot better if you weren't in here with my girlfriend." Jake replied. He trailed his finger tips down my spine. I fought the urge to squirm away.

"Edward and I were just catching up." I said. If Jake knew where I was going tonight he'd be really upset and I wouldn't get to go alone. This was something that had to happen between Edward and I.

"Yep. I was just leaving. Lots to do today. Nice way to start my morning though." he smiled at me. My cheeks instantly tinted pink and I fought the urge to bite my lip. I hadn't reacted to a simple smile this way in a long time. I remembered a second later that he could take my daughter from me. My blush faded and the dread returned.

"Have a nice day Edward." I said. He waved over his shoulder as he left.  
"Would you mind explaining to me why the fuck he was in here with you?" Jake was furious.

"Watch your mouth! I have customers!" I looked around making sure no one heard him,"We were talking. It's called being polite." I pulled away from him and washed an empty cup and sat it in the rack to dry.

"I don't want him near you again. I don't like it." he put his arm around my waist. I pulled away, "Jake this isn't the place. He's moving back here and we are all just going to have to live with it. It's a small town. He's going to come in here." I took a big step back from him.

"Let's take Lilly out to dinner tonight." he said trying to change the subject. He smiled wide and brought his hands up to stroke the apples of my cheeks, "Just the three of us. We could go get a pizza in Port Angeles. She'd like that." I shook him off.

"The answer is No Jake. We've talked about this." I folded my arms across my chest.

"She won't be confused if we explain it to her. I'm your boyfriend. She can understand that."

"She's seven, you can't just explain things to her. She has feelings and they get involved." the situation was more delicate now than before and I couldn't add Jake to the mix, not now.

"I am beginning to think you aren't serious about us." Jake said. I looked around making sure no one needed anything before I pulled Jake in the kitchen.

"Now this is more like it." Jake purred. He ran his hands down over my hips. I pulled away.

"you know why you can't be around Lilly." I crossed my arms over my chest again.

"Because we aren't serious." he said.

"Yes." I said, "Among other things." I added.

"Then let's get serious. Let's start by you letting me come to the zoo with you and you're kid this weekend.. It will be fun."

"Jake the answer is no and start using the front door!" I walked back out into the dining room and kept my back to Jake while he left.

"That went well." Alice said. She took her normal seat at the far end of the counter.

"He's relentless." I grunted.

"what time are you bringing Lilly over?" She asked with a wide smile. Alice loved Lilly and oddly enough considered her one of her best friends. They had a standing date for one Friday night a month, they had a sleep over and watched movies. Usually stuff I would of never let her watch like dirty dancing or center stage. Lilly loved to dance but sadly had inherited her sense of balance from me.

"Around seven if that's ok." I grabbed a pot and headed out to do refills.

"that's perfect. Bella will you please think about what I said?" Alice asked.

"About the dad thing?" I poured refills to the deputies from the station.

"Yes."

I took a deep breath and released it, "I'll think about it." I forced a tight smile.

"That's all I ask." Alice danced back to her store. I spent the endless hours that day obsessing over what I was going to say to Edward.

_Edward~_

After making my plans with Bella I went back to my mothers house. I needed to start getting things in order to find a place of my own. I was going to stay in Forks permanently and I couldn't be living with my mother right now. She had not said a word to me since last night. I laid in the meadow all night just staring at the leafs and letting the rain wash over my face. It helped me clear my head and make the decisions I needed to make. First I knew I couldn't leave Forks again. That meant I would have to call my agent, Marcus and my Publisher, Aro and let them know I wouldn't be doing any more signings or book tours. I refused to do anything that would take me out of town for more then forty eight hours at a time. I wasn't sure how my new demands would be met and I was worried I might get dropped from their respective client and author rosters. If that was the case so be it, making my life here was more important. I needed to decide what I was going to say to Bella tonight. Would she believe everything my mother had told me all those years ago? Would she believe I didn't know what was goin on here and that's why I stayed away? My only option was to tell the truth. I was determined to prove to her that I wasn't going anywhere and I could be trusted. I wanted to know Lilly. I may never earn the right to call her my daughter or hear her call me Dad but I was going to try. I shut the front door softly, my mother was on the phone.

"Two this afternoon is fine. I'll bring all the documents with me. Mr. Jenks came highly recommended, I hope he can help with my situation. It's rather delicate, I hope he understands." she clicked the phone off. I heard her shuffle papers into a folder. I moved upstairs quietly to my room. Why was my mother meeting with someone this afternoon and taking her precious documents with her? I was sure it had something to do with my fathers will. She still hadn't let me see it. After finding out how close he was to Lilly I wondered if he left her something that my mother was trying to cover up. If that was true then I had to stop her so Lilly could get what was hers. I didn't care what it was, big or small, if it was supposed to go to Lilly she would have it. I paced my room thinking of a way to get the papers from my mother. Something about that will was twisting her into knots. I wanted to know what and I wanted to know fast. My fathers partner and best friend, Carlisle Cullen was still working in the offices that he and my father shared. Maybe he was the one that had witnessed the signing of my fathers will. If he was then he might know what was in it to drive my mother so crazy. I decided to wait until my mother left for her appointment, then I was going to have a nice chat with my Uncle Carlisle.

I waited in the outer office patiently for Carlisle to be done with his appointment. It was one of the few places that was exactly as I remembered it. I glanced around at the pictures on the walls. My favorite one was of my dad and Carlisle standing with there first legal secretary, Cindy Brandon. They all looked so young and happy. Alice's mom only worked for them for a little over a year and then Esme, my mothers best friend, took over. She later married Carlisle.

"Edward! My boy! How nice to see you." he greeted me. I stood and gave my favorite uncle a hug.

"It's been to long." I smiled wide. The friendlier I was the better chance I had at getting the information I was seeking.

"Indeed. Is this a social call or are you in need of legal advice?" he swept his hand out showing me to his office. He looked impossibly young. He and my father were the same age but Carlisle looked barely a day over thirty. His blond hair was still free of gray and his eyes held only the finest lines around them.

"A little of both. I need to ask you a couple of questions" I took a seat in the chair in front of his desk. He perched himself on the corner.

"Would these questions have anything to do with the reason you're still here?" he smiled playfully.

"Yes. I've been trying to get my mother to let me help her with dad's estate but she's shutting me out. She's been stressed and I'm worried. There seems to be something in there that is troublesome." Playing the concerned son was only going to help me at this point. I was concerned but it wasn't for her.

"And you think I might know why?" he said. I nodded, " I was hoping maybe he left a copy of the papers or something that would point me in the right direction." Carlisle walked around to his chair and sat down. He opened his top desk drawer and pulled out a small metal box.

"Edward, your father was my best friend for most of my life. When he gave me this to hold for you I told him I didn't want to get involved. I told him that this was best handled by your mother. He was very concerned that in the end your mother wouldn't give you this. He was adamant that you have it." he slid the metal box to me. I took it with trembling hands.

"What's in it?" I wondered.

"I'm not sure. As I said I didn't want to be involved so he didn't tell me. He just said that if you should ever come looking for it to give it to you and only you." whatever was in that box was precious to him. It meant so much to him that he went to the trouble of keeping it hidden from my mother. I tried to open the lid but it was locked.

"Is there a key?" I asked him. He smiled, "I'm afraid I don't have it. He said he hid it in the absolute last place your mother would ever look." where in the world would that be? How was I supposed to find it? I ran over the ways I could just pop it open, a kitchen knife, a letter opener. None of those things would work. The box was to sturdy. I decided it would have to wait for another time. For the rest of the afternoon I sat with my fathers best friend, drinking coffee and sharing memories of the old man.

_Bella~_

I wore jeans and a flowing blue peasant top Alice bought me for my birthday. I thought casual was best for what was hopefully a brief meeting. It was stupid to meet him at Blacks since Jakes family owned it and he would definitely hear I had been there without him. We would fight. I didn't really care at this point. I had bigger worries. Rose smiled sweetly at me from behind the bar. I walked over and kissed her cheek with the bar between us.

"You look beautiful. What are we drinkin?" she asked. I didn't need alcohol tonight. I needed to stay sharp.

"Just a bottled water. Is he here yet?" I didn't need to say who. I was sure she already knew from Alice who had over heard the entire conversation this morning.

"He's in the very back. Called ahead and asked me to save the table. You two gonna play nice or are we callin your dad out here again tonight?" I put my hands up playfully and smiled. Even though she wouldn't be back there with me, it was nice to know at least one friendly face was here tonight. I took my water and moved to the table. It was much quieter back here, I hoped no one would over hear us talking. I didn't like the idea of being town gossip fodder once again. Edward stood when I approached the table. He was in khakis and a green knit polo. It was beautiful against his eyes.

"I hope you don't mind. I reserved the table. I thought it was better then fighting for space." he smiled. The corner of his mouth turned up just a little. I smiled back, "No this is great. I'm sorry I didn't think of it." he pulled out my chair for me. It wasn't a gesture I was use to. No one had pulled out my chair or opened my door in years.

"You're probably wondering why I asked you here." Edward said.

"Rose already told me. What is it you want Edward?" best to get right to the point. He sighed a breath of relief.

"I want you to know Rose started it but my mother was the one that supplied ninety nine percent of the information. Rose isn't to blame for this. I can only imagine how guarded that secret must have been." I was prepared for mad or angry. I had kept Lilly a secret from him for seven years, anger was appropriate at this point. I would have been angry. Edward shocked me. His tone was soft and sweet. It was nice that he wasn't letting Rose take the blame. It reminded me of the kid he use to be.

"What is it you want Edward? You didn't bring me out here tonight just to tell me you know about Lilly." I couldn't afford to get lost in pleasantries. I had to keep this civil but let him know without a doubt he wasn't a part of Lilly's life.

"I have questions. I also wanted to explain some things if that's ok." he turned the force of those big green eyes on me. I was fighting not to melt into his hands.

"Sure, explain away." I said. He straightened up and leaned in closer.

"I need you to understand even though my dad spent time with Lilly, no one ever told me about her. Bella, I am so sorry I wrote that damn letter. I thought it was for the best but after last night I can see that was wrong."

"Why was it wrong? You did what you wanted and I got left behind. We were kids Edward. The things you say and promise at seventeen in the heat of the moment don't mean anything. It's ok." I assured him. I kept my eyes down hoping he wouldn't see how bad this subject was hurting me.

" all the things I said to you meant something to me. I wasn't just sweet talking you. I meant those things. I wanted you to move to New York with me. My mother told me it was cruel to ask you to choose between me and your dad. It's not her fault, I wrote the letter. I am willing to accept the consequences for it." I would have packed a bag and chosen Edward in a minute. Even before I knew I was pregnant.

"Why did you stay gone so long?" it was a question that had bothered me for years.

"My mother made it sound like life was just moving right along. Even after the letter I would ask about you often. She said you were fine and wished me well. She made it sound as if you'd moved on. Thinking that everyone was ok without me just made it that much easier to stay gone. I guess even though I was the one that left I felt like you guys left me behind. It was stupid. I shouldn't of listened to her." the truth was I only saw Elizabeth in passing on the street. She never came to see Lilly and I always assumed she wanted us to stay away.

"Anything else?" I asked.

"I want to know my daughter. Bella please can we arrange something where I can spend some time with her? We don't have to tell her I'm her father. We can just say a friend or something." his voice was desperate. Part of me wanted to give in and say fine but the rational part of me that wasn't won over by his eyes, smile and messy hair said it wasn't about me anymore. I had to protect Lilly.

"I don't think that's possible. She's not use to people walking in and out of her life. I won't let you break her heart when you pick up and leave town again." I folded my arms over my chest and rubbed my arms.

"I'm not leaving, I'm not going anywhere. I've made all the arrangements to stay here permanently." my heart raced in my chest. The conflicting parts of myself became even more confused. I fought the smile that was bursting to get out and went with anger instead.

"Pretty words Edward. I'm sorry the answer is still no." I stood up to leave. Edward put his hand over mine when I pushed up from the table. Something happened that hadn't happened in years, his touch was giving me tingles. I felt fire on my skin. It was a small taste of the rush that I use to feel from even the briefest contact from him.

"Please don't go. I'll do anything to see her." he was on the verge of begging. I wasn't so cruel as to let him.

"Edward I think you staying here is one of those things I'll have to see to believe. I hope you understand, I'm not trying to be a bitch, I just have to look out for my baby. She's sensitive and she's sweet. She doesn't have a lot of friends and she clings to the people that she loves the most." I pulled my hand from under his gently, I instantly missed the contact. I didn't get butterflies or tingles from Jake. I hadn't gotten that from anyone but Edward.

"Every child needs a father. She deserves two parents." he informed me. I wanted to laugh.

" Em, Rose, Jasper, Alice, and my dad are her family. She doesn't need a father. She's doing just fine without one." I pulled my keys from my purse. I maneuvered the crowded bar in record time. I could hear Edward calling my name behind me. I didn't stop, I just kept walking to the car.

"Bella wait! I didn't mean to imply anything. I just want to be apart of her life so badly." I turned on him, he towered over me in the dark parking lot.

"You don't get it! She doesn't need you. She has everyone and everything she needs." I looked up into his eyes. I had to keep breathing but when I took a breath that was too deep I could smell him. It was exactly the same. God how I'd loved his smell.

"She may not need me but I'm not going anywhere and god damn it Bella I'll prove it. I'll prove it to both of you. No matter what it takes I'm not giving up on this." he gestured with his hand between the two of us.

"No no no! I have a boyfriend. Don't even start about you and me." I yelled at him. He smiled. I was yelling and the bastard smiled.

"Does he make you feel anything like what I made you feel? We may have been kids but it's never ever been that way for me since. I've never loved anyone else." his bright green intense eyes stared down into mine. My heart raced, my palms were sweating, I could feel the adrenaline pump through my veins. I'd missed this rush.

"Pretty words Edward, that's all. Just a lot of pretty words." I told myself he hurt me once he'd do it again except this time he wouldn't be hurting me, he'd be hurting us.

"I'm gonna show you." his voice was husky. It took all my strength to take one big step back and put some distance between him and I.

"Goodbye Edward." I stepped up into my jeep and turned it on. I put as much distance as I could between Edward Masen and myself. No one had won tonight and I wasn't giving in but I knew one thing for sure, I needed to find a way to feel that rush again.

A/n- Ok guys, I love all your reviews. You amaze me. Second, I didn't know how this was going to come out until it was written. Needless to say Bella and Edward and there hormones are driving the bus at this point, it's gonna be a hoot to see where they take us next. Review Review Review.


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.

_Bella~_

The coffee house was only open until Noon on Saturday. After we closed Alice, Jasper and I were taking Lilly to the park. Sunny days were rare in Forks but it was warm too which was an added bonus. I made more coffee and retrieved hot muffins from the oven then put more in. I loved to bake and my creations always sold well. The door opened, before I could look up I heard Lilly's laugh.

"Mommy! I had the best night ever with Aunt Alice! Look we made hair flowers." she pointed to the head band with a giant hot pink and yellow artificial mum on it.

"That's beautiful! Did you make one for me?" I asked excitedly. She produced a clip with glittering pink Gerber daises attached to it. My daughters sense of style was unique to say the least. She loved wild prints, abnormally bright colors. Anything that truly made a statement. Sadly her sense of style was starting to get her a bit of trouble at school. Her teacher had called a week before Mr. Masen's funeral to inform me she'd been getting teased. Her teacher thought maybe if we encouraged her to dress a bit more conventionally then it wouldn't be an issue. I told her my daughter would never blend in because she was born to stand out. I wouldn't change anything about Lilly and I wasn't going to let anyone else change her either. Today Lilly was dressed in a purple button up top and a black skirt. She was wearing her brand new pink suede boots, courtesy of her Aunt Alice's store. I smiled brightly noticing the neon orange leggings.

"Baby why don't you go play and I'll bring you back something to eat in a little bit." I kissed her forehead lightly. She ran off trailing her ratty, dirty pink bear behind her. She wouldn't let me wash it. She wouldn't even let me hold it. She always said Pinkie was special and she was hers. Pinkie went everywhere with her. The snarly bear was given to her as a birthday gift last summer from the Masens, well Mr. Masen. We never saw Elizabeth. Alice made herself a cappuccino and popped up on to her usual stool.

"So how'd it go?" she asked pleasantly. I didn't make eye contact with her, "It was fine." I knew she would dig for more but I wasn't going to offer it up.

"You can save the sour puss for someone else. I already got the dirt from Rose. You and Edward fought. Now spill it!" she leaned over the counter and snatched a muffin from the pan.

"Did Edward ask you about Lilly?" Alice asked.

"Yeah. He said he wants to know her. He said we don't have to tell her anything, he just wants to get to know her." my heart sank a little. I could see his pleading face in my mind.

"I think that's really sweet. Did you agree?" I couldn't meet her stare.

"I said no. I won't let him wreck Lilly like he wrecked me. She's too sensitive for him to just up and leave her one day." Alice raised her eye brow at me, "Ok percentage wise how much of this is about Lilly and how much is about you making him suffer? Because honey he's doing everything he can. He's making amends with his friends, he's asked your permission to see his kid and he's gotten the shit kicked out of him. How much more does he have to do?" It was a good question. I sucked in a deep breath, "It's ninety nine percent about Lilly. I hate that part of me wants to watch him suffer." I felt ashamed to admit it out loud but it was the truth. I wanted him to suffer for what he did to me. I wanted him to understand what a mess he'd made. If I gave right in he never would.

"Bell's I didn't have a Dad. My mom did the best she could but I missed it sometimes. I don't want that for Lilly." Alice was rarely serious but I knew right now she was speaking from her heart.

"When did you miss it?" I asked. She smiled warmly, "Usually it was the worst during little league and stuff like that. Charlie was always there for me but it hurt sometimes....you know....not having a dad of my own. Father daughter dances were hard." she shrugged keeping her eyes fixed on her lap.

"Alice, you understand why I'm doing this, right? I can't let him hurt her or worse try to take her from me. It's better this way in the long run." I reached for her hand. She let me take it. "This is all going to work out. I can feel it." Alice informed me. I smiled at her. Alice was rarely wrong but I was willing to bet against her this time.

"Wanna know the craziest part of all of it?" I asked her. She smiled, "Of course." I sucked in a deep breath, "When we were arguing. All I wanted to do was kiss him. Just one good hard, tonguey kiss." I put my hand over my eyes so I didn't have to watch Alice giggle and clap in front of me. Nothing good was going to come of any of this.

The afternoon closed in on us quickly and before I knew what time it was noon came and I could breath a sigh of relief. Another day done. Alice Lilly and Jasper walked to the park while I cleaned up. We were closed on Sundays so I wouldn't have to be back until Monday. I was stacking china saucers under the counter when the back door slammed. I sighed heavily.

"Jake we talked about you using the back door." I turned around and leaned against the counter. I knew once word spread about where I was last night that he'd come here and we'd fight. I wasn't up to this.

"We talked about you staying away from Edward Masen too but you didn't so I think I'll keep using the back door." Jake said. I turned my back to him and continued putting away saucers.

"If you came here to fight with me then you are shit out of luck because I don't have the energy today. I have to go meet Lilly and Alice at the park." I told him. He walked slowly over to the counter beside me and smiled, "I don't want to fight. I just wanted to make sure you're ok. I heard it got pretty ugly."

I shrugged, "Yeah. We argued. He said he wants to be Lilly's father." there was no point in hiding what he probably already knew. I was surprised it wasn't transcribed line for line in the freakin news paper.

"I wanted to talk to you about that. I've been thinking...." I stopped what I was doing and looked at him for a moment, "What have you been thinking about?" I asked him. "I've been thinking about us being serious. I want us to be serious." his eyes were softly staring into mine. I couldn't say a word. He continued talking for the both of us, "I put in a bid for the house on Maple street. It's five bedrooms, three bathrooms, nice big kitchen. I think we could be happy there." he said softly. I wanted to cry. I loved the house on Maple. He knew that. I stared at it every time we drove by. I didn't love the house it's self. I loved what the house represented, it was the house Edward and I always wanted.

"Oh Jake, that's beyond sweet but I'm not ready to move in with you." I played absently with a dish towel on the counter, he stared at me like I was crazy.

"Bella, I'm not talking about us moving in together. I want us to get married." I looked at him in total shock, "Married?" I said it as nicely as I could. In my head it was like a blasphemous four letter word.

"Well eventually. The house needs a lot of work, it's been vacant a long time. That will give us some time for me to get to know Lilly and for your Dad to warm up to the idea. When the time is right we'll buy a ring and I'll ask you for real." he gently reached down and took my hand in his. I didn't realize I was shaking until I felt my hand tremble. "I don't expect an answer right now. I know I've been an ass lately pushing you about Lilly and stuff. I guess I didn't understand what you needed from me until you went to see him last night. When I heard you turned him down flat about being in Lilly's life, I knew what you needed was for me to show you a real commitment." I stammered to say something to him, anything at all. Instead I stood mouth gaping, eyes wide. He kissed my forehead gently and smiled, "I'll know by the end of the day Monday if the house is ours. It will be ready for me to start renovations on it by the end of the month. Just think about it, ok?" he kissed me gently on the mouth and left before I could tell him no.

I drove to the park in a daze. I didn't know what to think. I thought all along I had made it clear I didn't want or need Jake's commitment. Maybe I'd given all the wrong signals. I could see Alice sitting on a bench while Jasper pushed Lilly on the swings. I got out of the car and sat down beside her.

"That took forever. What kept you?" she asked. I laughed nervously, "Jake just told me he's buying the house on Maple." I said.

"Wow, that's a lot of house for just him." I watched Jasper push Lilly higher and higher. She laughed and smiled yelling for more.

"He wants us to live there with him. He wants to marry me." I whispered. Alice's mouth popped open in a little 'O'. She was speechless for once.

"I know, Right?" I said to her. We sat silently for a long few minutes. She was gathering her thoughts, my mind was still a jumble of everything that had happened in less then twenty four hours.

"Did I give off the vibe like this is what I wanted? I mean I thought I was pretty frickin clear...."

"You didn't give off the 'marry me and buy me a house' vibe. You gave off the 'back the hell off me and my kid' vibe. I don't understand where he got the idea this is what you wanted." she said. Lilly screamed for us to watch as she went down the slide into Jasper's waiting arms. We both smiled, gave her thumbs up but all the while we were still talking between ourselves.

"He heard about what I said to Edward last night and apparently feels like he has something to prove to me now. It's weird." I could hear Jake in my head over top of the replay of my last confrontation with Edward. Even picturing Edward in my mind made my pulse race. I hated it and loved it all at once.

"He's weird. Bella it's time to end this. You had your little roll in the hay. I'm sure it was great but clearly he doesn't understand what's goin on with you two." Alice was right as usual.

"That's the thing Al, it wasn't great. Not even close. He's all hands and lips. It's all to hard and to fast."

"So you're telling me that for two years you've stayed with a guy who's a bad lay and a minor league nut case to boot?" I rolled my eyes at her, "He's not nuts. Just misguided. I wouldn't say he was bad in bed but it wasn't good. It just felt all...." I looked for the right word.

"Wrong?" Alice supplied the perfect word for me.

"Yes! It was all wrong. It wasn't sweet or comfortable. I don't get butterflies from him. I don't get all twitterpatted when he holds my hand." Alice being my best friend of my entire life understood what I meant.

"When was the last time you felt that way?" There had been Edward and Jake in my life, no one in between.

"Edward." I admitted softly. Alice smiled wide, "Yep. Definitely time to give Jake his walkin papers."

"You're right. I have to end this now. It's gone on to long." My decision was made. I was going to end it with Jake.

_Edward~_

I called Uncle Carlisle and he gave me the name of a really good real estate agent. It was a girl I'd went to school with. Tanya Denali. I'd called and made arrangements to meet her at the diner so we could sign the contracts for her to show me some houses in the area. She said she had a lot of listings for rent or sublet in Seattle and Port Angeles but nothing much here in Forks. I made my stance clear on the matter, I wouldn't live anywhere but Forks. I was sitting in the car parked in front of the diner. My cell phone was clasped in my hand. I knew I had to call my agent and make this official but I was scared. Being an author was the only thing I knew how to do. I had gotten a degree in English but writing was my only real job since college. If they dropped me I didn't know what I would do for a living. I decided to do it quick like ripping off a band aid. I flipped my phone open and dialed his number. I was prepared to leave a message but he answered on the last ring.

"Edward Masen! My favorite long lost client. How is life in plates?" he said cheerfully. I shook my head, "It's Forks, Aro. The town is called Forks and I've decided to stay for good. I won't be coming back to the city." I took a deep breath and waited for the yelling to start. He was surprisingly calm, "Well that does complicate things but no matter! You are a talent my boy, you have a gift that can be used anywhere." I blew out the breath I was holding, "There's more. Things here have gotten a little complicated in my personal life and I'm afraid I won't be doing anymore signings, no more tours."

"Edward how are we supposed to market you as an author if we don't put you out in the public eye? You knew there was travel involved when we signed you. Further more, you were paid an advance of your next book which we have yet to see a rough draft of. I'm sorry but I can't agree to those terms. You are under contract and you simply can't tie our hands this way." I knew what he was getting at. I would be dropped as an author. I had to make the choice. It was my career or Bella and Lilly. The choice was clear, "Aro, I'll have the rough draft to you by the end of next week but the travel is non negotiable. If we can't arrange a new contract you'll have to lose me. I'm sorry." I hung up before he could say anything else. He could offer me more money in exchange for travel but it wouldn't make a difference, my decision was made. With that out of the way I went inside the diner to meet Tanya.

"What kind of property are you looking for?" Tanya asked.

"just a house. Roof, rooms, yard. Nothing fancy. I was happy in New York living in my loft but I'm guessing there isn't anything that small here, right?" Tanya smiled, "Right. I have some smaller houses I can show you but I'm afraid we are very limited since we are staying inside the Forks city limits." I knew my limitations were making her job more difficult but I didn't care. This is where I wanted to be.

"Well let's see what you've got." I said. She pulled a few manila folders from her bag. She showed me some smaller houses that would be fine but none of them really struck me as anything great. I was getting discouraged with each discarded photo. How was I supposed to prove to Bella I was committed to making a life here if I was living with my mother? I needed proof of my commitment, something she could see. I needed roots.

"I'm sorry Tanya, none of these are right. Is there anything else?"

"Well one house is on the market but it's much bigger then what you were looking for. It's more of a family home." she reached down into her bag and pulled out her last folder, "It's been vacant a while and needs a lot of work. The owner died years ago so the property is 'as is' more or less. There's also already been a bid on it." she frowned and pulled out the first picture. It was the house on Maple. Our dream house.

"I'll take it." I said in awe. I ran my finger gently over the edge of the picture.

"Edward. I think you should look at it. It's going to take a lot of work, I mean a lot. New windows, new dry wall in most of the rooms, the appliances are ancient". I heard what she was saying but it didn't matter. This house was our long forgotten dream. I had the money and the time to make that dream come true now and I was going to.

"How much is it?" I asked. Tanya handed me the rest of the photos, "It's got a bid on it. One hundred fifty thousand." she whispered to me. I shook my head, "I can match that and out bid it. What do you think is fair?" I flipped through the photos one by one. I didn't see work, I saw promise. Bella would see what I did and she would have to know I was totally committed to her and Lilly.

"Well do you want fair or fast?" she asked me. "Fast." I told her. She wrote down a number on a piece of paper and slid it to me. I looked at it momentarily, "I'll start with that and if I get out bid just raise it again. I don't care what it costs." she smiled wide, probably extremely pleased with the commission she was going to make off this sale. After all, I had just agreed to put down a bid of almost one hundred thousand dollars.

_A/n- Thank you thank you thank you for all the reviews and awesomeness! It makes me so happy to see how much everyone is enjoying this. I know this chapter was short but I am hoping to post the next chapter by the end of the weekend. As always suggestions and reviews are appreciated. _


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.

_Edward~_

Saturday night I sat beside Emmett on his couch watching a baseball game I wasn't particularly interested in. I wasn't nervous about the bid I'd put in on the house. After realizing it was far to low, I came to my senses and raised it. Tanya had said over and over that I should look at it, tour it at least once before I agreed to buy it. I didn't need to. I knew whatever shape it was in I'd still take it. Not only was it somewhere to live but it was all a huge show of commitment on my part. I wasn't sure how the gesture would be received.

"I did something today." I told Em confidently. He took a long swig from his coke can and kept his eyes on the screen, "Good for you. Do you want a cookie?" he said with a smirk, ever the wise ass.

"I bought a house....I think....I'll know Monday. I'm pretty sure it's mine though." I wanted to wipe the shit eating grin off my face but I couldn't.

"You just woke up this morning and said 'hey I'll buy a house'?"

"Well I talked to Bella and she wont let me see Lilly until I've proven myself. She said she would have to see it to believe it. What's more proof of my commitment than to buy a home and put down roots here?" It made sense to me but I could see now I should of run it by someone else.

"I am just shocked you could just go out and buy a house. Shit, I couldn't even buy Rose the bar." he sat his empty can on the table in front of him and picked the bag of chips up off the floor.

"Rose wants to buy Blacks? Jesus Christ, why? It's a shit hole." I said. I was glad Rose wasn't home. She was actually being some what civil to me and I didn't need to ruin that.

"You know it's a shit hole. I know it's a shit hole but she loves it. She thinks it's got potential and shit. She's there more than she's here." I looked at Emmett for a moment, "Wait so because she can't by it, she works there?" I was trying to understand. "No. she's working off the down payment. Billy Black told her he would show her the ropes and she can keep her tips. Her actual paycheck goes back to Billy to go for the down payment. She should own it by the time we're eighty." he said sarcastically.

"Em I don't mean to pry but did she get anything in writing?" I made a mental note to contact Carlisle on Monday and check the legality of there arrangement.

"Nah. Billy owns the bar out right. He's going to sign over deed and all to Rose. Besides if he screws Rose over I'll mow him down with his own steam roller." Em let out a chuckle.

"You work for the Blacks too?"I hadn't thought to ask Em what he was doing for a living before.

"Yep. Going on three years now. Billy and Harry started it about five years ago and when Billy's health turned bad and Harry died the boys took it over. Sam, Seth and Jake. Black Water construction and demolition." I had to laugh a little, "You managed to find a job where they let you blow shit up? That's like your dream come true!" Em smiled, "Yeah. I'm a certified contractor and a demolition expert. Sadly I don't get to blow up as much shit as I'd like."

"If I do end up with this house would you mind coming over and taking a look at it? Tanya says it needs a lot of work." I took his empty pop cans and sat them on the counter in his kitchen. I got us each another and sat back down beside him.

"Sure. No problem. Which house is it? The one on seventh?" Em popped his can open and took a long drink. "No. it's the colonial on Maple." Em spit pop all over the living room. I jumped back to avoid the spray.

"Bella's house on Maple? THAT HOUSE ON MAPLE?" He yelled. I looked at him with wide eyes, "Is that to much? Is she going to hate it?" I asked him. He stood up, his hand on his forehead and started to pace. "No No she'll love it but there's a problem. You know there's another bidder?" I shook my head, "Yeah. I probably paid way more than I should of trying to outbid them." Em laughed and wiped his palms over his face, "The other bidder is Jake Black. He's been going on and on for a week about how he's going to buy Bella this house and they are getting married. Even went to his dad and got his mom ring. He wants your girl, your kid and your house, man." I stood up in front of Em, "Well he can't have them. I am going to get Bella back. I'm going to be a father to my daughter and damn it, I'm going to live in that house. I am going to make it the best damn house in Forks!" I yelled. "YEAH!" Em cried. I was fired up. He wasn't getting my family. Hell I might not be getting my family but at the very least I was going to win that house and show her I'm staying. Em, apparently as fired up as I was, put his fist out of me to bump. I bumped it hard and sat back down. I didn't care what I had to pay, he wasn't getting Bella's house on Maple.

My mother left the house early on Sunday morning. She had a standing brunch date with my Aunt Esme on Sundays. I stayed in bed until I knew she was gone. She didn't know I had bought a house. She would have thrown a fit or tried to talk me out of it. Seeing for the first time how easily she talked me into things I decided it was best not to tell her before the deal was done. I waited until I heard the garage door go down before I went into my fathers office. I had to search for the key with the precious little time I had while she was gone. No one had been in his study since he passed. It was a his private place. It unnerved me that I would have to disrupt his things. I opened the door slowly. The big mahogany desk was still in the same place as was his filing cabinet and his book cases. I walked around the edge of the desk quickly and began opening drawers and shuffling papers. I looked around the room turning in a circle. If the key was hidden in this room where would it be? I immediately opened the file cabinet and searched his folders. I ran my hand down over the bottom of the cabinet to make sure he hadn't taped it under the files. No luck. I moved over to the book case and started looking for books with the word key in the title on the off chance he decided to be clever. I searched the books and found nothing. I moved down on my hands and knees and lifted the edges of the rug. I wiped the palm of my hand all over the floor and found nothing. Not even dust! I cursed in frustration and replayed my conversation with Carlisle in my head. He hid it in the last place she'd ever look. I thought it over for a moment and ran to my parents bedroom. She hadn't gotten rid of any of his things yet. I opened his dresser drawers and flipped through piles of tank tops and boxers. Polo shirts and folded khaki pants, Nothing. I walked into there large walk in closet and started digging in the pockets of my fathers suits. Nothing. I wondered briefly where she had put his wallet. I had never thought to ask. Surely there was a bag of his personal effects from the night he entered the hospital. Where would she have put it? I closed the drawers and ran downstairs. I flung open the hall closet doors and there it sat. the bag I was looking for. I stared at it. I hesitated a moment knowing his clothes were in there from the night he died. This was what he wanted me to do. He wanted me to find that key. He wanted me to know the truth. I picked it up gently and opened the bag. Luckily the wallet was on top with a medium sized manila envelope. I sat down on the hardwood floor and opened the envelope first. I dumped it out on the floor in front of me. Inside were his keys, his wedding band, his rolex watch. I caressed the articles gently and smiled. I opened his wallet next. All the standard things were in there. Credit cards, drivers license. I smiled at the school photo of Lilly he had in the plastic picture holder. She looked adorable with her hair in a pony tail, her tiny hands tucked beneath her chin. I took it out to get a closer look. When I slipped it out a folded white piece of paper fell from behind it. I sat the wallet and picture a side and unfolded the paper. In my fathers hand writing it said "Build a bear work shop. May 2008. " What the hell was that supposed to mean and what the hell was build a bear workshop? I put everything back in the bag and put it back in the closet. I walked up the stairs with Lilly's photo and the paper. I went back in the office and made sure there was nothing out of place and then went into my room and fired up my laptop. When it came on and I was connected to the Internet I did a Google search for Build a bear workshop. What I found was as funny as it was surprising. My father had directed me to a store where you can stuff your own toys! Where would he keep something like that? What the hell did the key have to do with these toys? There was nothing like that in the house. It would of stuck out like a sore thumb. I snapped my laptop closed and laid back on the bed. My cell phone rang on the night stand next to me. I rolled over and picked it up.

"Hi, Edward? It's Tanya Denali. I know I said we wouldn't know about the house until Monday but I have great news." she was very energetic.

"Oh?" I said.

"Congratulations! The other bidder pulled out. You are now the proud owner of the house on Maple street." my heart swelled in my chest at her words. I won. I had bought Bella's house.

"We need to discuss financing. When would you like to meet?" she said.

"I won't be financing it. I'll pay cash. How soon can we finish this up?" I wanted to start moving as soon as possible. The sooner I was moved the sooner I could focus on the key and Bella and Lilly.

"I can have the papers drawn up by Wednesday at three. You bring the money and I'll have the keys and deed for you then!" I smiled wide and sighed, "Thanks Tanya. I'll see you at your office on Wednesday." After my call to Tanya was done I called Em. We had a lot of work to do.

Bella~

All day Sunday my stomach was in knots. I knew I had to break up with Jake but I didn't actually know how to do it. What was I going to say? Mostly I was worried about how he would take it. I didn't understand how he could be so emotionally invested in us when I had never given off the indication that's what I wanted from him. I stood in the kitchen watching Lilly play in the back yard. She was supposed to have a play date today but it was canceled at the last minute. This was nothing new to me. It routinely happened to her and I felt like it was my fault. Having a baby out of wed lock wasn't something that happened often around here. When I got pregnant with her the rumors swirled about who her father was. I always knew she was Edwards but I never confirmed it to anyone. It wasn't there business. Many parents didn't want their kids playing with Lilly because of the questions it would raise with them. "Why doesn't Lilly Swan have a Daddy?" I could just hear the questions. She had some friends but she wasn't close to any of them. She considered Alice her best friend and the feeling was mutual. Lilly talked animatedly to Pinkie at her tiny plastic table. I loved watching her.  
"Hey Bell's." My Dad called from the front door. I needed to tell him about breaking up with Jake. I didn't want him to hear it from anyone else.

"Hi Dad. How were the fish today?" I asked sweetly.

"Biting. Billy did better than I did." he shrugged and handed me his latest catch to put in the freezer. I turned and walked back into the kitchen.

"Hey Dad. I have to tell you something." I said with my back to him. I fumbled around with things in the freezer trying to avoid facing him.

"Yeah I heard something interesting today and I wanted to ask you about it." he said. I squeezed my eyes shut tight, "Okay you first." I shut the freezer door and turned around.

"Is it true you're getting married?" he asked softly. I nearly threw up, "NO! Who in the hell...."

"Billy said Jake came to him and wanted Sarah's rings. I didn't think you guys were that serious." he said gruffly. I understood his hesitation. If I was getting married and didn't tell him it wouldn't of been the first time I kept a life changing event from him.

"We aren't that serious. I'm breaking up with him! He's talking crazy about buying a house and being around Lilly." I was so frustrated with him and the situation. When things started with Jake it was more or less to please my Dad. He was good friends with Jakes family. He was worried about me and said being a mother couldn't be my whole life. He said it wasn't healthy not to have my own life. So when Jake asked me out the first time I said no but he was persistent until finally I agreed to go out on one date with him. That was two years ago and since then it was just more and more draining. I always smiled at the right times and played the proper girlfriend but inside I felt nothing.

"Good. I think it's for the best. I meant for you all to go out on one date. You know sorta get you back out there. I didn't think he would get so attached." he sat down at the table folding his arms across his chest.

"Me either. I always kept him at arms length for a reason." I shook my head.

"Yeah. Heard you had a run in with Edward Masen over at Blacks." My Dad's feelings about Edward were understandable. I knew he wasn't pleased I had seen him.

"Yeah. I had some explaining to do. So did he." I looked down at the kitchen floor. I felt like a kid again that got caught sneaking in after curfew.

"So he knows all about Squirt then?" I closed my eyes, "Yeah. I also told him he cant see her. It's not fair to her. He's just gonna run off again."

"Maybe he won't." My head shot up, "How can you even say that?" I narrowed my eyes at him.

"Bella, I don't like the kid for what he did to you but that's not Lilly's fault. She deserves to know where she came from. She's half him. It's not fair to her." my mouth gaped. "I can't believe you're defending him. Has the whole town lost there minds? Alice is defending him. Emmett's having lunch with him. Jasper has basically forgiven him! Can't anybody seem to remember what he did to me?" I said. My Dad smiled, "Oh baby. Haven't you figured it out yet?" he asked me.

"Figured what out?" I asked him.

"Your life stopped being being about you the day you had her. She's what matters. She deserves to know where she came from. You don't have to tell her anything she wont understand right now but there may come a time in her life where she came from. It's not your place to keep that from her."

"I'm protecting her!" I yelled.

"Protecting her or protecting yourself?" he asked softly.

"Her. When he leaves again it will break her heart. I won't let him hurt her." I said. I looked out the window again and saw my baby sitting on her swing set. She really was a perfect mix of Edward and I. His bright emerald green eyes and my pale skin. Her hair was a bronzey red brown. In the sun it glowed like Edward's always did. I looked back at my Dad. He walked over slowly and kissed my forehead. I wrapped my arms around him.

"Oh Daddy this is such a mess. I have to break up with Jake and Edward being here just makes everything more complicated. What am I going to do?" I asked him on the verge of tears. He stroked my back gently, "One thing at a time baby. Just take everything one thing at a time." he said. I nodded that I understood.

"And Edward?" I asked hoping for advice.

"You're a smart girl and a wonderful mother. You'll figure it out." I wish I had as much confidence in myself as he had in me.

"Mommy?" Lilly said behind my Dad. I let him go and straightened up.

"What baby?" I smiled reassuringly.

"I want to look at pictures. Will you look at them with me?" she asked. I smiled, "Sure. Go get an album and I'll meet you on the swing." she ran off happily to pick a photo album. She loved to hear the story of the day she was born. She really liked the part where her grandpa passed out and Aunt Alice took over. She liked looking at pictures of my mom too. I loved showing them to her but it made my heart ache a little. Dad excused himself to go shower and clean up. I grabbed a blanket from the couch and waited for my daughter on our front porch swing. A few minutes later the screen door banged and Lilly climbed up next to me with a large leather photo album in her arms.

"You want to see this one?" I asked her. She didn't usually want to look at my high school photos.

"Yep." she said happily. I put the blanket over her lap and opened the album. The first picture was of Alice, Rose and I sticking our tongues out at the camera. Lilly laughed. The next one was of Edward and I at prom.

"Mommy you looked like a princess." she said with amazement. My gown for that prom wasa a soft baby pink with little crystal flowers. Alice picked it out but I remember truly loving that dress. My hair was pinned back with pink crystal barrettes and Alice had spiral curled it all down my back. I felt like a princess that night.

"Well Aunt Rose was prom queen. I was just on the court." I smiled at her. She pointed to my very handsome date, "Who's that?" she asked. I had a policy against lying to my kid so I told her, "That's Edward. He was Mommy's prom date." not the whole truth but not a lie.

"He's handsome. Like a prince." she said in awe. It was that kind of thinking that got me in this mess in the first place. I quickly turned to another photo and tried to distract her.

I paced back and fourth in the coffee house on Monday night after we closed. I had to break up with Jake here because I didn't want him at the house. Alice picked Lilly up from school for me and was taking her back to her place. What was I going to say to him? I had practiced in my head all day but nothing sounded right. Nothing was going to stop this from hurting him. I had never done this before. Edward was my first boyfriend and when he left I thought he'd be my last. I never thought I would have to break up with someone. I looked up at the clock on the wall. Jake would be here any minute. I left the front door unlocked and sat down at a table to wait for him. I watched out the window as his big black truck came into view. He parked in front and climbed out. He carried a manila folder with him as he came in.

"Hey baby. I am so glad you called. I've got good news and bad news. What would you like first?" he sat across from me. He looked a little upset but still smiling. He was always smiling. It was almost annoying.

"I need to talk to you." I reminded him. He laughed a little, "Oh well bad news first then. We lost the house on Maple. The bid got pushed up really high and I just couldn't do it. The good news is we have lots of other houses to look at. I made an appointment to see one tomorrow." he wasn't listening, again. This was one of the things that got on my nerves the most. He just kept talking. It was like nothing I had to say mattered.

"Jake, I'm sorry about the house but it's for the best. " I looked him in the eyes. I wouldn't be a coward about this. I wouldn't look down in my lap while I hurt him.

"How can it be for the best? You love that house."

"I'm breaking up with you. I can't do this anymore." I said. He looked at me for a moment like I was crazy. Like this was the silliest thing he'd ever heard. "Bella, we are buying a house. I practically asked you to marry me and now we are breaking up? This doesn't make sense." his face was tense. He didn't understand. To him what we had was perfect. There was no way he would understand this.

"No Jake, you are buying a house. You want to get married. I don't." I sat up straight in my chair. I couldn't let him see me falter. I couldn't look hesitant in anyway.

"This is because of Masen, isn't it?" he asked me. I shook my head, "No this is because of me. I don't want the same things you want so I think the best thing is to let you go so you find someone who wants those things." It was the kindest thing I could do for him. It was the kindest thing I could do for both of us.

"I don't want us to break up. I'm in love with you. I want you and Lilly. All I've ever wanted is for the three of us to be a family. That's all I've ever worked for." I could see the pain in his eyes. It was killing me to hurt him. I knew how bad this must hurt.

"Jake you've been wonderful to me. I'm sorry it had to end this way but it's for the best it really is." I stood up from the table and walked over to the front door. I opened it slowly and stood beside it. It was time for Jake to leave. He stood up and walked to the door. I looked down for a moment. It was to sad to actually watch him leave. He gently caressed my face with both of his hands. He lifted my chin up to meet his eyes.

"Bella this isn't over. You'll figure it out, you love me too." he whispered softly.

"Goodbye Jake." I turned my face away from him. He walked out pausing by his truck for a moment, "I love you Bella. I won't give up. This isn't over." I shut the door and locked it behind me. He was wrong. This was very very over.

A/n- I hope this chapter was more exciting than the last. Thanks for all the reviews and favorites. It really does help me write. As always review are appreciated and so are suggestions.


	9. Chapter 9

_Edward~_

I walked down main street on Wednesday afternoon swinging my brand new house keys around my finger and whistling. I must of appeared to be in a great mood. The residents of Forks were actually smiling and saying Hello. It was the first time since I arrived that I didn't feel like I was going to be run out of town with pitch forks and torches. I was on my way to Spoons. I decided this was the perfect time to go in and tell her about the house. I had so much to do. I had to buy furniture and new appliances. Emmett and I were supposed to walk through the house tonight and he was going to give me a rough estimate on what everything should cost. I had insisted on paying him for the labor but he wouldn't hear of it. It frustrated me but I didn't want to insult him so I backed off of the subject. I approached the coffee house and saw Alice sitting at an empty counter sketching. I smiled wide and decided it was time to make amends with Mary Alice Brandon. I opened the door and walked over to the counter.

"Did the happy bug crawl up your ass or something? You are smiling like a damn idiot." she said never looking up from her pad.

"I'm glad your here. I wanted to come in and say I'm sorry about everything and I hope you'll forgive me." I wasn't sure what Alice was more mad about, the book or the fact that I left and never returned.

"Apology accepted. Now get out. I'm working." she said and pointed to the door.

"Do you know when Bella will be back? I needed to talk to her. It's pretty important." I shoved my hands in my pockets and waited.

"Any minute now. She just had to return something to the florist." Alice was almost smirking.

"That's odd. What did she have to return." I wondered.

"Flowers....from Jake....." Alice mused.

"Why would she return flowers from her boyfriend?" thinking of them together made me a little sick but I kept my mouth shut.

Alice smiled a little, "Did you hear about Bella and Jake?" she asked me.

"What about Bella and Jake?" I grinned a little. I had forgotten how informative small town gossip could be.

"They broke up Monday." she said lightly and took a sip from her water bottle.

"Are we sad or not sad?" I asked. My good mood returning a little.

"Not sad....at all. He's nuts."

"Would you mind if I waited with you?" I said softly.

"It's your afternoon and this is a free country. Wait away." she said sarcastically.

" I did something and I hoped Bella might see it as sort of a gesture." I blushed a little.

Alic raised her eye brow at me and waited.

"I bought the house on Maple. It's mine free and clear. Emmett and I are going to start working on it as soon as possible. I'm hoping it will be enough to show Bella I'm staying."

"Holy crap! You could of just hung around. She would of understood eventually." Alice said with a smile.

"I was willing to try that but I Bella needs to visualize what I'm trying to do here."

Alice nodded in understanding, "Edward, I want you to know I am on your side. I think Lilly deserves a father but if you fuck this up I will hunt you do like a dog. Are we clear?"

"As crystal. Don't worry. I'm going no where. I've called my Agent and told him no more travel, no more tours. I bought a house. I'm here for good." I said with pride.

"She's a lot like you, you know." Alice smiled wide.

"Lilly?" I said with wonder. I always thought she'd be more like Bella.

"Yeah. She's stubborn like Bella and she loves to argue but she's inherited a few of your better qualities."

"Like what?" I asked. I was desperate to know what she was like.

"She's really really smart. I was thinking about letting her do my books for the store. She could probably do a better job than I could." we both laughed, "She's a reader. She loves books but I think she got that from both of you. She got your eyes and your hair. She's really really great." Alice said with pride. I opened my arms and leaned over to her. She hugged me back for a moment, "Thanks Ali." I said quietly. I was the only one to ever call her that. In high school she hated it but I was hoping she wouldn't mind it now. Our embrace broke and we settled in, talking and laughing as we waited for Bella.

Bella~

I drummed my fingers against the counter waiting for someone to come and help me. The large bouquet of Lillie's laid in front of me.

"Hey Bella, whats up?" Angela Webber Chaney smiled at me.

"I need a favor. If Jake comes in here and wants to send me any more flowers please just tell him I said no." I slid the lilies back to her.

"Uh. Can I ask why?" She smiled politely.

"We broke up which I am sure you already know. I don't want to give the wrong message so please if he comes in here and wants to send anymore just tell him I've personally requested not to get anymore deliveries." I was ready to bribe her if necessary.

"Will do but you know Jake. He wont give up that easy." I smiled sweetly at her, "Thanks for your help Angela." I gave a little wave and walked back down the street to my coffee house. In the last few days I had received flowers, cards, candy, jewelry. Really anything he can think of to send he sent it. I sent it all back of course. I didn't want to accept anything from him. He had gotten the wrong message before and I didn't want that to be an issue again. I stopped in front of my store window. I could see Edward and Alice chatting happily. The whole town really had lost there damn minds. I opened the door more roughly than needed and walked back behind the counter.

"Look who stopped by!" Alice said happily. I reminded myself I had to be nice. We had to co exists. This town had never felt smaller to me.

Hi Edward. How are you?" I said with very little emotion. Alice hopped down off her stool and danced over to her store. I put my apron back on and planted my palms on the counter in front of me.

"What can I get you Edward?" I wasn't in the mood to be pleasant and pleasing. Being alone with him wasn't a good idea today or any day. Just being in the same room with him still made my pulse race. I was pissed off and irritated with the world but I was turned on by his very presence. That just annoyed me more.

"I didn't come in for coffee. I wanted to know if you had plans this evening." he smiled, the bastard. It was crooked and gorgeous. His lips pulled up at the corners. The smile was slow and lazy. That smile made me crazy. I had to remind myself we weren't kids anymore. We were rational adults who didn't think with their hormones. They thought with their brains.

"the reason I ask is I have something I'd like you to see. Is it possible for me to see you tonight?" I bit my lower lip and let his warm voice wash over me.

"Lilly goes to bed at nine. I'll only be able to be gone for a bout twenty minutes." I said softly.

"Won't your Dad watch her?" he asked me. I shook my head, "She's my kid. I'll watch her. Twenty minutes. Where should I meet you?" I said curtly. My stomach was flipping over at the idea of being with him tonight even if just for a little while.

"Corner of Maple and Elm. I'll wait for you there." he knocked the counter once gently with his fist and walked away. He was still so cool. Bastard. When he was gone for sure I laid my head on the counter and groaned.

"Stop fighting it. You know you wanna sleep with your baby daddy!" she called from her store. I gave her the finger. She laughed hysterically and sang some obnoxious rap song about baby daddies.

Edward~

I walked all the way home which in Forks wasn't that far. I couldn't stop smiling. My arms ached to hold Bella and my hands itched to touch her. It was getting to the point where I was laying awake in bed at night just thinking about going over to her house. I laid there and wondered if she still left her window unlocked. She used to do it all the time when we were younger. That's how I got in undetected. I reminded myself that we were grown ups now with a child to think of. Neither of us could afford to do anything crazy. I would have to keep my hands to myself until I was sure she wanted me too. That was going to be very hard but it was what I had to do. I walked in the house and shut the door behind me. My mother was in the kitchen arguing with someone.

"Listen, I don't give a damn what you think. This isn't fair and if you cant help me I'll find someone that will." she paused for a moment and continued, "How dare you call me unethical. It was unethical for him to do this to me. I was his wife for thirty plus years damn it and I want what's mine!" she yelled. There was something in my Fathers will she didn't like. She was trying to get it changed. Was it legal? Could she do it?

"Look she never earned anything of his. She didn't even know him. For her to have a stake in this is ridiculous." Who was she talking about?

"I'll just find someone that is willing to do this for me. It cant be that hard to do!" she slammed the phone down into it's cradle. I opened the front door and slammed it closed, making my presence known.

"Edward? Is that you?" she called. Her tone was totally changed. It was a little disturbing how quickly she went from yelling and menacing to my sweet voiced mother I remembered.

"Yeah mom. It's me." I walked into the kitchen smiling like I hadn't just heard her conversation.

"Sweetheart you're on your own for dinner tonight. I am going out with Esme. We have theater tickets for a play in Seattle." she smiled warmly. She clearly didn't remember we weren't speaking. She had lost a lot of weight since I'd been here. Her face was thinner. Her arms were almost frail looking.

"Mom. I have to tell you something." I said. I stood up straighter.

"Oh dear. What have you done?" she asked. She sat down on a kitchen stool laying her bony hands in her lap.

"I bought a house. It's all done. I just wanted to say thank you for letting me stay here." her mouth fell open in shock, "Edward, you aren't staying here. You have an apartment in New York. Your publisher is in New York. Your life isn't here." she said.

"Mom I am staying here. It's the big colonial on Maple. I bought it. In cash. It's done. You should be happy. I am your only son for crying out loud." I pinched the bridge of my nose with my index finger and thumb.

"Edward I wanted more for you. I expected more for you. Really if this is all about Bella...." she raised her hands in exasperation.

"It's not all about her. I'm not happy in New York. I don't have any real friends there. It took coming home to see that this is where life is." I don't know why but I needed her to understand. She shook her head, "This is a very expensive mistake but it's your mistake to make. I have to go get ready. Excuse me." she walked slowly down the hallway and up the stairs to her room. I heard her bedroom door shut with a thud. I walked over to the hall closet and quietly got the keys from my fathers hospital bag. I felt like shit for doing it but I had to make sure I could still have access to the house if I needed it. If the secret she was hiding was so big she was willing to commit estate fraud she might change the locks on me too. I couldn't risk it. I walked out of the house a few minutes later to go meet Em.

I waited at the front door. I didn't want to go in alone. I was afraid I would see the damage and panic. I ran my hand into my hair and sighed. I should of listened to Tanya and toured it before I bought it. It wouldn't of changed anything but it would have been nice to see what I was up against. Especially because I didn't know how to do any home repairs myself. Em's truck pulled up against the curb. He climbed out with take out in one hand and a six pack of beer in the other.

"Congratulations. I cant believe you actually did it." Em said loudly. I ran my hand over the back of my neck and grinned.

"What's all this?" I asked and pointed to the bags.

"House warming party. Jasper's on his way. Steaks, salads and baked potatoes. Figured we'd eat....have a couple beers and hopefully find some shit for me to blow up!" he gave a booming laugh. I was pretty sure he was kidding but with Em sometimes it was hard to tell.

"Are Jasper and I okay since he beat the shit out of me?" I asked him.

"Yeah. You know how it is." he shrugged.

"Where the hell is he? I'm starving!" I announced.

"He said he had to stop first. Said to start without him. Let's go in and see how bad it is." Em smiled wide. I turned and opened the door slowly. The first thing that hit me was the musty smell. This house had not been entered in a while. I stepped cautiously inside and looked around. The paint was peeling off the walls and just from the smell I could tell there were mice and possibly bugs. The floors creaked and groaned when I walked further in. there were holes in the floor boards and some of the steps had rotted away on the stairs.

"We have a lot of work to do." Em commented absently.

"How much do you think...." I asked him. The price didn't matter. I'd do anything to make this happen.

"Ball park?"

I swallowed hard and prepared myself, "Yeah ballpark."

"fifty thousand." He said absently.

"We haven't even been upstairs yet!" I said.

"You're right. Sixty thousand. First things first you need to have it bug bombed and get a professional cleaning crew in here to clean up the mess after." I nodded and made a note.

"Jesus Christ, that smell is awful. Let's eat in the yard." Em turned and walked back outside. I went with him. Jasper joined us a few minutes later. He acted as if nothing had ever happened between us. It was the way I preferred it. We didn't need some big drawn out scene where we hugged in a manly way. Jasper was a quiet person and if he never wanted to talk about it again I didn't mind. Now all I had to do was count the minutes until I saw Bella.

Bella~

I watched closely while I made dinner and she sat on the floor in the living room with "Where the sidewalk ends" by Shel Silverstein. "Everything okay in there?" I asked her from the kitchen. She sighed like she was very annoyed with me, "Yes. I'm just reading." I went back to making dinner. I was nervous about meeting Edward tonight. Why did I even agree? I should of told him to back off or just leave but no being the sweet overly pleasing person that I am I agreed. The side screen door slammed.

"This has total disaster written all over it." I mumbled to myself and put some pasta in boiling water.

"What does?" I jumped a foot and turned around. Jasper had nearly scared me to death.

"You nearly killed me! Good lord. I am going to put a frickin bell on you or something!" I laid my palm on my chest.

"Sorry. I wanted to talk to you. Is this a good time?" he smirked.

"Yeah. It's fine. Do you want to stay for dinner?" I turned back to the stove.

"Nah. I'm meeting Em and Edward." he pulled out a chair and turned it. He sat down resting his arms over the back of the chair.

"I don't understand how you can just forgive him." I cut a loaf of French bread roughly.

"I did what I had too. It's done now. That's actually why I'm here." He offered me his hand. I took it and let him drag me to stand across from him.

"You still love him." he said plainly. I sucked in a strangled breath, "Do not." I said.

" I know he hurt you. I know he broke you and I am not saying you don't have a right to be upset or angry but you are keeping Lilly from him. It's not fair." Jasper looked me in the eyes. I looked away from him quickly.

"I'm protecting her." I felt like that was all I said lately. To Jasper, Alice, My dad.

"You're protecting yourself." I chewed my bottom lip and listened to him. I couldn't scream or yell. I refused to do that in front of Lilly.

"You have put up so many walls Bella. You protect her by denying yourself. You cant deny the way you feel about him to me. We both know that I know you like the back of my hand. I know you love him and I know all you ever wanted was to be with him. Thats why Jake never measured up. That's why no man was ever good enough. It's always been him. Now he's standing in front of you begging to give you everything you ever wanted and it's okay to be scared. It's okay to be scared enough for all of us but Bella, don't deny Lilly her father because you're scared. He doesn't want a title, he's not asking for that. He simply wants to know his kid." Jasper's voice was soothing. I understood what he was saying but he didn't understand how hard this was.

"You don't understand." I said softly. He stood and pushed his chair under the table. He kissed my forehead gently and smiled, "No. I don't but I know you and I know Edward. The two of you will meet in the middle some how. Just give him a chance."

"Thanks Jazz." I hugged him for a moment before he went in to say hello to his god daughter.

After Lilly was bathed and tucked into bed. I set off for the corner of Maple and Elm. I shoved my hands in the pockets of my leather coat. Jasper was right about so many things. I was scared. I was so scared that I was going to make a mistake. I was so nervous to let one brick slip from the wall I'd built. I knew in my heart I couldn't protect Lilly from everything forever. I never prepared for this. I always just thought he was gone. Now he was here and things were getting more and more complicated by the day. I approached the stop sign on the corner and saw Edward standing there. I put my head down and kept walking.

"Thanks for coming." he said low and sweet.

"I said I would so here I am. Let's make this quick." I put my hand in front of me offering him the lead. He took my hand gently pulling me off the sidewalk and across the street.

"Remember how you told me you wanted proof I was staying here? I think your exact words were 'I'll have to see it to believe it.'" he grinned and kept pulling me down the sidewalk.

"Yes, I remember." I said cautiously. Edward sighed, "Well take a look and see it." I looked up and there it was. My house, our house with a sold sign in the yard. I put my hand over my mouth in total shock. It was hard to breath. I couldnt stop staring. I couldn't meet his eyes. If I did i'd lose it and do something stupid.

"If I told you that i've given it all up for you and Lilly would this be enough proof for you?"

The tears ran down my cheeks before I could stop them.

"You bought it?" I asked in shock.

"Yep. Needs a lot of work but it's worth it. I would take you inside but I don't recommend it right now." he chuckled softly.

"This was our dream." I whispered. He rubbed my fingers gingerly, "I remembered. We had a lot of dreams. A lot of them are lost but not this one." he gently intertwined our fingers. I didn't get the urge to pull away or retreat. He hadn't walked away and forgotten me. Seven years had passed. He had a life somewhere else but he remembered our house, our dream. I turned and wrapped my arms around his neck.

"I can't believe you did this. Oh god Edward!" I hugged him tighter. He hugged my waist tight and stroked my hair. "There is so much I want to say. So much I want to show you. I've missed you so so so much." he whispered. I didn't want to let go of him. It had been seven years since he was in my arms. I wasn't ready to let him go.

"We have so much to think about now. It's not as easy as it used to be." I said over my tears.

"It's not going to happen over night, I know. We've got all the time in the world. You tell me where we start and we'll start there." I reluctantly pulled away from him. I wanted to see his face for what I was about to say to him, "Can you meet me at the football game Friday night?" he smiled wide "Sure, why?" I couldn't believe I was about to say this, "I think it's the best place for you to meet Lilly." I watched as the tears welled up in Edward's beautiful eyes, "Really? Are you sure?" he asked his voice cracking. I nodded, "My only rule is She comes first. As far as she needs to know you are an old friend of mine. When the time is right we will explain it to her. Any hard questions that come up we will decide how to answer them. If you can agree to that you can see her." I took a steadying breath.

"I agree. She's first of course but you and I....." he was holding my hand again. It was making it hard for me to think straight. "You and I are friends. As I am sure you can understand, I've got issues." his hand was so warm. It spread heat all over my body. God how I'd missed his touch.

"I'll be here as long as it takes. I don't care if we are standing at Lilly's college graduation when you finally want to be with me again. I'll be there." he whispered. He leaned down and gently kissed my cheek. I sighed happily, loving the tingle his lips spread over my skin. Edward walked me home never letting go of my hand. Neither one of us had much to say. It was nice just being in each others presence. We stopped at my gate reluctantly. "I'll see you Friday." I said. "I can't wait. Thank you Bella, I know this is a giant leap of faith for you. I can't imagine how terrifying this must be." he had no idea.

"Just try to remember if you screw this up you aren't just breaking my heart this time. She's special Edward. Fragile. Try and remember." I looked in his eyes. They were emerald green under the street lights. I could of stared at him forever.

"I'll remember. I'll see you tomorrow morning." he said with a grin.

"Games not until Friday." I reminded him.

"I'll need coffee tomorrow morning. I am sure I'll miss you before then." he lifted my hand to his lips and kissed it. My heart pounded. God he was so smooth.

"Goodnight Edward." I said softly.

"Goodnight Bella. Sweet dreams." he mused. I watched for a moment as he walked in the direction of his mothers house. When he was gone I squealed just a little to let it out before I went in the house.

"To bad I couldn't get that reaction from you." my head whipped in the direction of the porch swing, "Jake? What the hell? Were you spying on me?" I asked indignantly. He got up and walked slowly down my dad's stone steps.

"I was waiting for you. Charlie said you went out but I thought it was just for a walk with Alice. I didn't realize you were out fucking cheating on me while Lilly slept." my eyes went wide. Emmett was right, he was nuts.

"Jake we broke up on Monday. Remember? Hence all the returned flowers and gifts" I asked him. I wrapped my arms around myself like a shield. His eyes were wild, there was no comprehension in his face.

"And I told you we weren't over. I told you I wasn't giving up. You lied to me." he yelled. I put my finger to my lips willing him to be quiet.

"I never lied to you Jake. I called it quits. I'm sorry I hurt you." I said softly. I was trying to sooth him.

"You said it wasn't about Masen and now here you are walking home with him. What did you do Bella? Sneak off as our daughter slept and have a little roll in the fucking hay with him?" my mouth gaped. Our daughter? Lilly wasn't his and he knew it. I had no intention of dignifying that with a response. I pushed past him and opened the gate.. He grabbed my upper arms and shook me. "How could you sneak out and act like a whore? How could you do that to me? I'm the only one that ever loved you! I'm the only one that ever cared!" I jerked back to get him off me. I stumbled over a crack in the sidewalk and fell. He took the opportunity and stood over me. Big and menacing.

"You're mine! You always will be!" he pointed down at me. I crawled back words until my tail bone hit the bottom step. I scrambled up on to my feet and ran up the steps and into the house. I locked it behind me and slid down the door with my head in my hands. The TV was off. My dad was in bed. I didn't want to bother him with this. Jake would come to his senses in a few days and it would be over. In the mean time I just wouldn't go anywhere alone. I took a few calming breaths and stood up away from the door. I walked up the stairs slowly trying to ignore my aching tail bone and the dull ache in the back of my thighs. I peeked into Lilly's room and thankfully she was sound asleep. I went in my room and changed into a soft comfy tee shirt and a pair of sweats. I went over and completed my night routine by taking off the minimal amount of jewelry I wore. I took out my earrings and lifted the lid on my jewelry box. The first thing I always saw was Edward's class ring. My engagment ring for all intents and purposes. I hadn't worn it since Lilly was a baby. I couldn't bring myself to looked at it most of the time but tonight was different. I lifted the heavy ring gently by the chain it was still attached to. I don't know why but I put it around my neck. Something about it made me feel comforted and safe. I laid down in my bed and sighed. It had been years since I missed the weight of him next to me but tonight I really did miss it. I curled my fingers around his ring and grabbed the pillow that should have been his, curled my knees up and that night I slept better then I had in seven years.

A/n- THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!! For all the reviews. You guys constantly inspire me. I am extremely proud of this chapter and I hope you all enjoy it. Next chapter Edward and Lilly's first meeting. Reviews as always are awesome!


	10. Chapter 10

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Bella~

I stood behind the counter at the coffee house the next morning. Alice was blabbering on about Halloween and the fall fair downtown. My thighs were aching and my back was bruised from the fall. it took all my strength not to scream this morning when Lilly hugged my waist to say good morning.

"Are you all set for tomorrow night?" I asked Alice. We ran a joint booth at home games for the high school. She sold Spartan apparel out of her half and on my half I sold coffee and other hot drinks. It was a great way to make money since we'd be at the games anyway. There wasn't really anything else to do around Forks in the fall.

"Yeah. All set." she replied. I moved slowly cleaning up tables and cups as I went.

"Is there anything you want to tell me?" Alice asked. I wanted to tell her about Jake. I didn't want to worry anyone with my problems. I smiled a little, hoping to lighten the dark questioning look on her face, "Why? what did you hear?" Alice turned the stool to face me completely. She crossed her thin pale legs resting her folded hands on her knees.

"Rumor has it that you and Jake had it out in your front yard last night." I shut my eyes tight, "God damn it! I didn't want anyone to know about that." I huffed.

"You honestly think in this town no one saw you two? I also heard it was because you were making out on your porch with Edward Masen and Jake saw it. I told Lauren you couldn't of been making out with Edward Masen because if you had I would of heard about it immediately if not sooner. If you did and you didn't tell me I am going to be offended in a big way." I leaned my head to the side and rubbed the heel off my hand over my temple, "No Alice. We talked. I told him he can see Lilly. That's it. God do you believe everything you hear?" Alice gasped, "You agreed? Why?" I shrugged, "I don't know. I think the decision was based on emotion and not intellect. It was the damn house. He just looked so proud of it and Alice it's falling down around his ears. I mean this place is a serious piece of crap and he bought it just because it was something that was still standing after the wreckage of us, what we were." I wanted to cry thinking of the proud expression on his face when he stood in front of the Maple house. "The house was a sweet idea. When does he get to meet Squirt?" the thought of Edward and Lilly actually meeting still stirred dread inside me. "Friday night at the game. I'll introduce them and then they are on their own." Alice shook her head, "And she is going to think he's what?"

"An old friend. I am going to talk with her tonight and make sure she understands he may not be staying." I had thought it over and decided it was best to tell Lilly he may not be staying just in case he left again. I knew what the shock of that could do. "I think he's here for good and I think he still loves you." part of me hoped he did and part of me knew there was no going back. We would never be Edward and Bella, Forks high "It" couple again. I didn't know if we could be anything else. I didn't know Edward the man but when he showed me the house, when he was pleading with me to see his daughter I saw traces of the Edward I knew. I just had to hope there was enough of the old him to make this risk worth it.

"I have one more question." I laughed out loud. Where Alice was concerned there was no such thing as one more question.

"What?" I sat down for a moment in an empty chair.

"Did Jake push you down?" her little Alice face was full of concern.

"No. I tripped." I got up as best I could and went back behind the counter.

"Lauren Mallory said he was yelling and calling you a whore. Is that true?"

"Yes. He's just needs time to get over it." I kept my eyes down so I didn't have to look at her.

"I think you should tell your dad." she said.

I shook my head, "Nope. Jake is my problem. No one else's."

"I think it's a mistake not to tell your dad. Bella, he's nuts."

"He's my problem. End of discussion." I went into the kitchen for fresh muffins. Alice stomped to her side of the store and slammed the a joining door.

I had an exhausting day at the coffee house. One by one I sent back gifts from Jake just to come home and find that he had them re routed to the house. It was beyond annoying at this point. I was grateful however that he wasn't coming to see me himself. I was wearing still wincing in pain from our last encounter. I went back and fourth on my decision about Lilly and Edward all day. I knew it was a stupid thing to do to risk my daughter but something about them seeing each other felt right. It felt like it was long over due. I had no one I could talk to about this. It felt like everyone I knew was on Edwards side. News spread quickly all over town about Edward buying the house. I drove by it on the way home and saw he already had crews inside working on something. I couldn't imagine the state of disrepair on the inside. The outside was bad enough. When I turned into the driveway my Dad's cruiser was already there. It was way to early for him to be home.

"Grandpas home early." Lilly said brightly from the back seat. She climbed out of the car and ran into the house to see him. I walked slowly behind her trying not to let my stress show.

"We need to talk Little lady." My Dad said the minute I came in the house. I stood just inside the side door, "What did I do?" I asked. "Lilly go upstairs and start your homework." Dad ordered her. She stomped her foot, "I wanna watch Mommy get yelled at." she demanded. "Lilly.....homework....now!" he pointed to the living room and off she went dragging her book bag behind her, "It's not fair. Never get to watch the good stuff." she grumbled to herself and went up the stairs. I waited to hear her bedroom door close before I started yelling.

"How dare you speak to me that way in front of Lilly." I came the rest of the way in the house and put my purse and laptop on the counter. "Why didn't you come and get me last night after Jake assaulted you? He deserves to be in jail!" my dad shouted.

"He didn't assault me. We had words and that was it Dad." I moved around the kitchen getting the things I needed for dinner.

"God damn it Bella will you stop moving for two minutes?" he crossed in front of me and slammed the refrigerator door shut, "This is serious! Did he hit you?" his eyes darted over me in panic. I understood what he was going through, I was a parent too.

"No dad. He didn't hit me. I tripped over the sidewalk. The worse thing he did was call me some names and scare me a little." I smiled reassuringly at him. "I want you to come down to the station and file a report. Just so it's on file. Mike will handle everything and I'll watch Squirt tonight." I sighed, "No. I've got this handled. I've sent back the flowers and the gifts. He just needs a chance to get over this. Everything will be fine." I hugged my Dad for a moment and let him hug me so he would know I was right here and I was fine. "I'm gonna have some of the guys down at the station check on you a couple times a day just for a little while and I don't want you going anywhere alone. Take Alice with you to walk Lilly to school and someone should be with you when you close up at night. Promise me Bell's, promise me you'll take this seriously and do what I say." I pulled away from him when he was done talking. "Okay Dad. I'll do what you ask but no police report." I patted his cheek gently and went back to cooking dinner.

"How did this happen?" He asked.

"He said you told him I was out for a walk and he was waiting on the swing. You didn't know he was out there?" I put a pot of water on the stove and went back to the fridge.

"I never told him you were out for a walk. I would never tell a guy you just broke up with where you were. That's justs stupid." he crossed his arms over his chest. "If you didn't tell him then why was he waiting on the porch? And how did he know I was on a walk?" I wondered. "Sounds like he's stalking you. Sure you don't want to file that report?" he asked gruffly. "Yes. I'm sure. He will get over this in a few days. I just need to give him time." saying it out loud didn't make me believe it. I could tell my Dad wasn't buying it either. "I heard you went over to the Maple house with Edward Masen. What was that all about?" he sat down on a kitchen chair. He was in full on cop mode. I didn't enjoy being questioned but I knew I had to tell him eventually.

"He bought it. He wanted to show it to me." I got some things from the fridge and carried them over to the counter.

"That's a pretty big deal. Must be planning on staying around." I walked back to the fridge and got my Dad a beer. I handed it to him and smiled. It was best he hear this from me and not some random town gossip monger.

"I'm going to let Edward meet Lilly. I've set down ground rules and he knows if he screws this up it's done and he can't see her again." I watched my Dad sit his beer down mid sip and stare at me. "Dad, say something, please." I wrung my hands in front of me and waited for him to say something.

"Just be careful." he took a long drink of his beer. I let out the breath I was holding. Now I just needed to talk to Lilly.

I went upstairs to talk to Lilly while dinner was cooking. I was only slightly worried I had left Dad in charge of it while I went to check on Lilly. Her door was a jar and I could see her sitting cross legged on her bed studying my old photo album with pinkie at her side.

"Hi. What are you lookin at?" I went over to her bed and sat beside her.

"Your pictures. I like them. They're pretty." I smiled down at the picture she was looking at. Edward and I were staring into each others eyes as we danced. His smile was dazzling, even in photos.

"Do you remember who that is?" I asked pointing to Edward. Lilly shook her head, "Yep. I made up a story about him. I call him prince Edward. He was the prince and you were a princess. Aunt Rose was a queen and Uncle Emmett was king. Aunt Alice and Uncle Jasper were there too. You all lived in a beautiful kingdom where it never rains and it's always sunny." I bit my lip trying not to smile at her very elaborate explanation.

"And why don't we live there anymore?" I wondered. She rolled her eyes at my idiotic question, "You got to old and they kicked you out." Her face was so serious like it was the simplest answer.

"Gee, thanks Lill." I said and gently tickled her sides. She giggled happily and then settled in next to me.

"How would you like to meet the real Edward?" I took the photos from her lap and sat them on the floor beside us.

".gosh. Mommy, really?" she gave me a huge beaming smile.

"Yep. He's in town for a little bit and he really wants to meet you." I laid back against her head board and sighed at how comfortable I was laying here for a moment with her.

"He wants to meet me? Prince Edward wants to meet me?" she acted as if I had just said she was going to meet a major celebrity but I suppose to her a new person in her life was much the same thing.

"He does. He's going to come to the football game tomorrow night. He's going to sit with you and Uncle Em if that's okay with you." I said casually.

"It's way okay Mom. Way way way okay." she hopped over my legs and off the bed.

"What are you doing?" I asked her. I sat up and watched her rummage in her closet.

"I need something to wear! It's not all the time you go to a football game with a king and a prince!" she rolled her eyes again. I went over and knelt beside her, "Baby, you do know he's not really a prince? He's just an old friend of Mommy's that wants to see you." I brushed her hair off her shoulder and smiled. "I know he's not a prince for real but to me he is. Mommy he's so handsome." I laughed a little and stood back up, "I know he is but tomorrow night let's just call him Edward and leave the prince stuff at home, okay?" I kissed her forehead. She continued digging in her closet as I went down to finish dinner.

Edward~

I strolled into Spoons on Friday morning before meeting Em over at the house. He wanted to drop off some tools and I wanted to show him my little fire proof box that still had no key. Bella was cleaning up tables wearing a soft looking lavender tee shirt and a knee length denim skirt. I let my eyes move over her from her sandal clad feet all the way up to her lush shiny brown pony tail. She was so gorgeous. I smiled wide, "Good morning!" I said and walked up the counter. Bella smiled a little more than I had seen since I had been here. "Just the man I wanted to see. I heard something interesting about us last night." she crossed her arms over her chest and grinned from ear to ear. "It must have been a good something." I leaned my arms on the counter and smiled up at her. It was so tempting to touch her, "It was a good something?" I asked. She busted out in a fit of giggles, "Did you know that you were a prince and I was a princess? Oh and we lived in a magical kingdom where it never rains and it's always sunny?" I smiled wider, "If such a place exists why did we leave?" I pondered. She moved away and poured me a black coffee to go as usual. "We got kicked out for being to old." I laughed and snapped my fingers once, "Damn. That's the one that will get you kicked out every time! This is the best gossip I've heard since I got here." I took my coffee from her and let my fingers linger a moment on hers.

"Oh it's not gossip. This is according to Lilly. She was looking at pictures of us and made up the story." Bella rolled her eyes for a moment.

"She's got quite the imagination." I commented and took a sip of hot coffee.

"She sure does. She thinks you're a prince. She almost fell over when I told her she would see you at the football game tonight. She's really excited." I was happy to hear that. It took some of the pressure off. "Well I'm excited too. It's not every day I get to attend a football game with a beautiful girl." I looked at the clock above the counter and grimaced, "I hate to cut this short but I'm late to meet Emmett. I'll see you tonight." I winked at her and walked to the door. I got back in the car and looked through the big glass window. Bella leaned on the counter resting her chin in her hand. She gazed out the window. I didn't know if she was watching me leave but I hoped she was. I sat there a moment and than blew her a kiss before I drove away.

Em's company truck roared up Maple street as the painters started working on the outside of the house. I turned and watched him hop out of his truck, happy smiling and whistling as usual. Em was almost never in a bad mood.

"What's up Edward? Oh you hired painters! Good move!" he slapped my back and walked up the yard carrying an arm load of heavy tools.

"You need some help with those?" I asked him. Em laughed, "Hell no. I bench more than this." I opened the gate to the back yard and walked over to the shed. It was leaning to one side and when we were done with it I fully intended to let Em blow it up. That would make him happy. Em put everything in the shed and closed the doors. "I need your help with one more thing. What do you know about fire proof boxes?" I asked him and walked down to my car on the street. He followed behind me, "I know you can't blow em up. Why?" I opened the trunk and pulled out the box, "This was given to me by my dad's partner Carlisle. He said it was to be given to me and only me. Em, I think there is something in this box. Something my Dad may of wanted Lilly to have and my mom is trying to get his will changed. She's willing to go as far as to commit estate fraud. I need to know what's in this box so I can stop her and get Lilly what is hers." I looked at it sitting on the trunk of the car and honestly it was just starting to make me mad. Em pointed to the lock, "Wheres the key? It's got to have a key." he studied it all over. I laughed, "Oh it came with a message. It's in the last place your mother will ever look." Em looked at me with a puzzled expression, "What the hell does that mean?" I shrugged, "Beats me. I've searched the house. His car. The only clue I've gotten is a picture of Lilly from his wallet and a piece of paper with the name of some make your own toy place written on it."

"Build a bear?" he raised his eye brow in question. "yeah that was it." Em's smile widened, "Lilly loves that place. All little kids do. The bears start out empty and then you stuff em and dress em then you name them. It's pretty fun I'm embarrassed to admit." his cheeks flushed. "What does one have to do with the other though? I don't get it." I pinched the bridge of my nose and sighed. "Well we can try to break it and risk whatever is inside." he shrugged. "No. I don't know what's in there so let's not do that. I'll just have to try and put the pieces together. Not now though. I am meeting Lilly tonight. Did you know you were a king and Rose was a queen?" I shook my head as he looked at me, "Never mind. Anyway. When do we start work on the house?" a car door slammed across the street. Both Emmett and I turned to look. Quil and Embry strolled twoards us. "What goes on gentlemen?" Em said. Quil jerked his heard to the house, "Heard it got bought but I didn't know it was you Mccarty, your old lady has gotta be stoked." I laughed, "No no it wasn't Em. It was me. I bought it a few days ago." I still felt an over welming surge of pride over my purchase. "Your kidding? You bought it?" Embry said with narrowed eyes. "Yep. All mine." Embry's body stiffened, "Hey. We gotta get back to work. Em when you get in come to the office and pick up your check." they both turned and walked back to their truck and peeled out down Maple street. "What just happened?" I asked him. "I don't know but it was nothing good." He replied.

The fall air was crisp and cool as the sun went down. I was waiting for Lilly and Bella by the gates of the football field. As I was standing in wait several people smiled at me or asked for an autograph. Mostly it was high schoolers from the opposing team but it was nice not to be totally hated. I heard Bella's laugh before I saw her face. I would know her laugh anywhere. It was light and care free like an angel sighing. They walked a little fast when they spotted me. Bella's eyes narrowed but the smile didn't leave her lips. My heart rate tripled. I couldn't believe I was about to meet my daughter for the first time. Bella opened her arms and hugged me gently for a moment. She smelled like heaven. Her hair was down over the shoulders of blue and gold 'go Spartans' shirt. Lilly wore a matching one with her hair in pig tails. "Edward this is Lilly. Lilly this is Edward." Bella took a step back from us and I knelt in front of Lilly and extended my hand, "It's very nice to meet you." I said in a low voice. Lilly shook my extended hand and smiled. I was in awe of the perfect creature we had created. In my eyes she was the most beautiful child in creation. I was sure there were others that would agree with me. "It's nice to meet you. I'm Lilly Renee Swan. I'm seven." she bit her lower lip a moment after her statement realizing the introductions had already been made. "I'm Edward Masen. I'm twenty six." I stood up but didn't let go of her hand. "Let's walk your Mom inside and then get something to eat." Lilly's smile faded, "I'm not allowed to eat crap, right mom?" Bella and I both chuckled, "It's a special night honey. Eat what you want." Lilly pumped her little fist in triumph.

The three of us walked inside. Lilly chattered away about her grandpa and football. Going over and over all the things he had taught her. I was listening but I was watching Bella too. Lilly was the light of her life. When she was near her Bella's body and soul relaxed and she looked at peace.

"Well this is me. Lilly you know where I am if you need anything." she leaned down and kissed her forehead. Lilly wiped the chap stick off her forehead with the back of her hand. "I'll walk her back here after the game, if that's okay?" I said. Bella smiled, "Sure. Just make sure she doesn't eat to much junk and no soda. It's water only. If she needs a potty break come find me." I blew out a breath and looked down at Lilly. Lilly smiled up at me happily. "I think we can handle that." Bella waved goodbye and we were on our own.

We walked to the concession stand in silence. I wasn't really sure what to say and I couldn't expect the seven year old to be a great conversationalist. "So....Um...what would you like to eat?" I looked down at her from the corner of my eye. "A hot dog please with ketchup and some cotton candy." I grimaced, "You aren't planning to eat them together, right?" She giggled. It melted my heart. "No!" I laughed along with her as we moved up in line. She relaxed a little and told me about her school and her teacher. I got the impression she didn't have many friends. We sat down on the bleachers as the marching band was taking the field. Lilly ate slowly and didn't talk with her mouth full. When she was done she had some questions for me. "Are you my uncle?" the question stunned me into silence for a moment. "No. I'm a friend of your mom's. We went to high school together." "Oh." she seemed a little sad. "What's wrong?" I asked. She turned to me very seriously, "I had a friend. His name was Mr. Masen. He gave me a bear and was really nice. He died and I miss him. He wasn't my uncle either." she was talking about my dad. "I know. I miss him too." I said sadly. "Did you know him?" she asked me with peaked curiosity. "I did. He was my dad." I smiled a little. I hoped he could see this where ever he was and I hoped it was making him happy. "Tell me all about your bear." I said. I scooted closer to her on the bleachers and wondered what was keeping Em and Rose. It was almost kick off. "She's pink and she has cool clothes cause Aunt Alice made them for me. Pinkie is a magic bear." I grinned down at her. She opened her giant bag of cotton candy and took a huge bite. I handed her a bottle of water and a napkin. "What makes her magical?" Lilly smiled with her teeth full of blue goo, "She's magic cause her heart is a secret. Mr. Masen told me to never ever give her to anyone because she's special and her heart is the magic key to everything. I take her everywhere! I even stuff her in my back pack so no one can steal while I'm at school." my mind was racing. Lilly's bear was special. My father had given her a special bear....a bear with a heart that was the key to everything. I cast my eyes sky ward for a moment and sighed to myself. _Oh Dad, how could you trust a seven year old with the key to everything? _

A/n I hope this chapter is well received. I worked so hard on it and I wanted it to be just right. I hope I achieved what I wanted it to be. I think the Lilly Edward meeting was priceless. Next chapter is not happy stuff. I am going to warn everyone now. As always thank you for the reviews and support. I really would like to see this story hit a five hundred reviews by the end.


	11. Chapter 11

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Jake~

I had heard the rumors and the town gossip. Edward Masen bought my house. I sent Quil and Embry to check it out. I knew Bella really didn't want to break up with me. I knew she loved me and wanted me to be there for my daughter. Lilly may have been Edward's biologically but she was meant to be mine. Fate wanted us to be a family. I had it all planned out. I knew how things should be and how things would have been if She just would of figured out what I already knew. We were meant to be. Our whole lives we had been just inches from being together. It was Edward that got in my way back then and it was Edward that was in my way now. I knew it wasn't my Bella that sent back my gifts. It was her friends that were making her do it. She wanted my gifts. I didn't mean to yell at her on her porch. It was regrettable when she fell but she had to see. She was being thick headed and difficult. I had to find a way to get rid of her friends. When her friends were gone and it was just the three of us she would see how silly this all was. Then we would get married and I would adopt Lilly. We didn't need her friends. She would make new friends. Friends who understood why I loved Bella even though she had traipsed around town like a whore. They would understand how I could love our daughter even though she was a bastard. I had a plan and step by step I would put it in motion. Bella would be back with me soon enough.

Emmett~

I was in deep shit and I knew it. When Quil and Embry left I knew in my bones I was in deep shit. I drove back to work as slow as I could just to take a few extra minutes before I had to deal with this. Jake would know Edward bought the house he wanted. Jake was not dealing with his break up at all. He maintained they were still together and Bella just needed a break. I knew the truth. She didn't need a break. She did what she should of done after their first date. She dumped his ass. Everyone knew she let it go on to long but we understood why she did it. She didn't want to be alone. They were both adults that just needed to go there separate ways but Jake wouldn't go. I heard the way he talked about Bella. She wasn't his girlfriend, she was property. It made me sick to listen to him but he never said anything directly to me and I needed a job. So I kept my mouth shut and stayed away from him. I always told Bella he was a nut case and she needed to stay away but Bella being Bella always thought he was just being protective or he was over reacting. Jake's truck was parked in his spot in front of the office. I parked my truck and plastered a smile on my face. Maybe I was over reacting. Maybe they just wanted to remind me to pick up my check and the tone of voice he used didn't mean anything. I was great at my job. I was so good that people asked for me specifically. I rolled my eyes at myself and kept walking. I was being stupid. Nothing was going to happen.

Emily's face dropped when the door closed behind me and she looked up.

"HI Emily. Did the payroll come in?" I decided it was best to stick with the pay check thing.

"Jake has your check. He's in his office." She kept her eyes down when she spoke. I kept smiling. I walked behind her and knocked on Jake's door. He gave a muffled command to come in. I walked in leaving the door open behind me.

"Emmett, have a seat." He said. I nodded. I sat down in one of the chairs on front of his desk.

"What's up? Emily said you've got my check." Jakes desk was neat as a pin. I could see the check laying in front of him in the middle of his desk.

"Yes, I have it. I wanted to talk to you." As if on cue Quil and Embry filed in the small office and stood on either side of Jake.

"What's going on?" I looked all three of them in the eye.

"I want you to know Emmett, we think you do fantastic work. We've never had a complaint about you and you are highly requested." Jake said. He leaned forward in his chair placing his folded arms on the desk.

"Thanks. That's nice to hear." Quil and Embry looked at each other and back at me.

"Em, are we not paying you enough?" Quil asked me.

"No. No. I make great money. Enough to support Rose and I both. I have no salary complaints." I assured them, still smiling.

"Well if you are making enough money to stay a float why are you doing side jobs?" Embry cocked his head to the side and narrowed his eyes.

"I'm not really. I just help my friends out sometimes. Home construction is expensive."

"You help your friends out during your work day in your company vehicle?" I wasn't being paranoid. This was about Edward.

"I was on my lunch break when you saw me today. I was dropping some of my tools off. Helping Edward Masen isn't going to affect my performance here, I promise. It's only on weekends and at night."

"You were dropping them off in the middle of the day in your company truck. If you'll recall there is a clause in your contract that prohibits the misuse of company property." Jake slide my contract to me with that section highlighted.

"Everyone does it." I said looking over the contract.

"We understand that but The Maple house is a lot of work, seventy five thousand dollars worth to be exact. If you are working for Edward for free on the weekends and using your company truck to help him during the week then you are practically stealing from us. We can't have that now, can we?" Jake leaned back in his chair and smiled. This was possibly the most uncomfortable I had been in my entire life. I knew what they wanted me to say but I couldn't bring myself to say it.

"What is it you want me to do?" I asked in a growl.

"Just don't help Edward. Not on weekends. Not during the week. Not ever. Just let the house fall down around him and when he leaves don't beg him to come back. In return, I will make you a full partner in the business. I'll sign a portion of it over to you right now." Being a partner was a dream come true. I made money hand over fist for them for years and I had earned what he was offering but I wouldn't take it at Edward's expense.

"I'm sorry. I can't do that. He's been my friend since the first day of kindergarten. I can't do that to him." All my hard work flushed down the drain. If he wasn't one of my oldest friends I might of thought twice.

"Was he your friend when he told all your secrets to make a quick buck? Was he your friend when he left Bella pregnant and alone? How is it you can show him loyalty and he's done nothing but hurt the ones you love ? I gave you a job. When the mill closed down and the whole town was suffering it's loss I took you in. I gave you a job. I convinced my father to let Rose run the bar. I thought we were friends." Jake slid my check to me and shook his head, "I'm sorry Em. I can't let you work for me if I don't have your loyalty." I took the check and stuffed it in my back pocket. "You'll have my resignation by the end of the day." I stood up and walked to the door. "No need. You're fired for misuse of company property. I'll need your truck keys and you can clean out any tools you might have in the work shop." I tossed my truck keys and my door keys on to his desk and left without looking at him.

Inside my truck my first thought was Rose. She didn't know what was going on. She would be blind sided if Billy fired her. I pulled out my cell phone and dialed our home number. It was to early for her to be at the bar but there was no answer. I dialed her cell but there wasn't any answer. I called Alice and she told me Rose had been called in to do inventory. "Fuck!" I screamed after we hung up. I drove quickly across town to Black's hoping to catch her before she got blind sided.

I could hear her screaming before I got out of the truck. It was a sound I would know anywhere.

"What do you mean I'm fired? I've busted my ass Billy. This isn't fair!" I threw open the door and stepped inside. Billy was in his wheel chair holding Roses keys. She was standing in front of him hands on her hips. Her cheeks were flushed. Her eyes were red. They seemed to have been arguing for a while.

"Rose, this is a family business. I simply can't turn it over to you knowing the kind of people you associate with." Billy was in on it too. They knew I wouldn't turn on Edward and Rose wouldn't turn on Bella. They planned this.

"Who she's friends with has nothing to do with her ability to do her job. She's busted her ass and you know it. She's been working for over a year for free. You had a deal with her." I stepped beside Rose and slid my hand into hers protectively. My Rose was tough as nails. She wouldn't let them beat her down. She wouldn't let them win.

"Rose has made her choices Emmett. I gave her the choice and she chose."

"What choice? Bella or the bar?" I roared. Rose wiped away the tears running down her cheeks.

"He said he would sign it over to me today if I got you to stop helping Edward and arranged a meeting for Bella and Jake." she said softly. "You fuckin bastard! You wanted my wife to pimp her best friend out to your psycho son? That's sick."

"This isn't over Billy. I'm getting a lawyer." Rose said firmly. Billy laughed, "Do it. Waste your money. We didn't have a contract. As far as anyone knows you were just volunteering to help a poor old man out. You've got no case and no witness's. Get the hell out of _my_ bar." I had never wanted to hit an old man in a wheel chair but I wanted to beat the shit out of Billy Black right now. I pulled Rose out of the bar. She climbed in her ancient red BMW and peeled out of the parking lot. She headed in the direction of our place. I followed behind her. She was crying so hard she could barely drive.

When we got home I cuddled Rose on our couch and let her cry. Crying wasn't my style but I understood how she felt. Rose lost her bar. She had worked so hard and given up so much and now it was gone. I lost my chance to be partner. I stroked her back and kissed her forehead. Tomorrow we would worry about paying the bills. Tomorrow we would have to face our friends and admit we were broke but tonight I was just going to hold my Rose and let her cry.

Bella~

Our booth was busier than usual all night. I was exhausted when the game was over and eager to hear about Lilly's meeting with Edward. I could only assume it was going well since I hadn't heard from wither of them.

"I didn't see Rose and Em tonight. Hope every thing's okay." Alice said and folded the little bit of merchandise she had left.

"I'm sure they're fine. You know Rose and Em. They probably just got caught up." I wasn't worried. It wouldn't be the first time they missed something because they had fallen in bed together. It was really sweet. Alice picked up the box and walked it to her car in the parking lot. I yawned and cleaned up on my side. I could see him coming from the front side of my booth. Jake was walking over to me. His head was down, dark hair flowing around his shoulders.

"Bella can we talk, please? I only need a minute." he said softly. "I don't need to hear anything you have to say, Jake. Just leave me alone." I turned my back to him and wrapped to go cups back in plastic. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean what I said the other night. I am so upset. I miss you so much." I sighed, "Apology accepted but Jake we really are over." I turned back to him. The service counter of the booth separated us, he took a step closer. "I saw Edward in the stands with Lilly. I know they're waiting on you but I have something to say and I'll never forgive myself if either of you get hurt." his voice wavered over the last part of his statement. His eyes were full of concern. "Sure, whatever. Just do it fast. I want to get my kid home." I mumbled. I truly didn't want to hear anything he had to say. "I know Edward out bid me for the house on Maple. That's okay with me. What's not okay with me is him coming into town and sweet talking you after seven years." the hard edge to his voice returned but he kept it low as to not draw attention to us.

"Sweet talking me? What are you talking about?" I kept cleaning up and didn't look at him.

"You know what I mean. Buying houses you love. Showing up at the coffee house every morning. I just need you to think about something. If he hadn't found out about Lilly would he still be here?" my head jerked up.

"What?" my eyes narrowed.

"Think about it. He hasn't called in seven years. Hasn't written. He didn't even notice you at his Dad's funeral. Do you think you were on his mind when he came in to town? Because he didn't come back here for you. He only came back because his Dad was dieing. To top it all off he profited from you. All of you. What's he going to do next? Write a book about the home town hero that finds out he's got a daughter. Is that what you want for Lilly?" he asked with a hiss and to his voice.

"This isn't any of your business. Just leave Jake." I said over the lump in my throat. The house was my proof he hadn't forgotten me. It was my only proof. I wouldn't let myself think about the fact that he was leaving town when he saw Lilly the first time. I wouldn't let myself think about how he only sought me out after he had wanted to ask me to see Lilly. I wouldn't let myself think about any of those things until Jake laid them in front of me plainly.

"Like I said I just had to say it because if he hurts the two of you and I didn't try to stop it I would never forgive myself. I still love you Isabella and I'll always be here." he turned and walked away. I squatted down behind the counter and wiped my eyes.

"Bella what's wrong?" Alice high feminine voice asked me from the back door of the booth.

"Nothing. Nothings wrong. Hey could you go get Lilly for me? I'm not feeling so good. I'll meet you guys by the car." I stood up and untied my apron and tossed it in the box.

"Don't pull that shit with me. What's going on?" Alice grabbed my hand and looked me in the eyes.

"Jake just said some things. I shouldn't let him get to me."

"Your right, you shouldn't. Whatever it is, I'm sure he's just trying to rattle you." she rubbed my arm lovingly.

"Yeah. I'm sure that's it too." I faked a smile when I heard Lilly's laugh coming to the booth. I had let Edward see her and let Lilly see him. I wouldn't be able to separate them now but I could protect myself. I could still protect my heart.

A/n- Thanks for all the reviews. I really love getting them. I hope this chapter is well received even though it's sad and Jake is psycho. Review review review.


	12. Chapter 12

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight

Edward~

I laid in bed. My arm tucked underneath my head unable to sleep. Everytime I closed my eyes I replayed the night over again in my mind. It had gone perfectly until I took Lilly back to Bella. She looked tired and sad. A total turn around from when I left her at her booth earlier in the evening. She barely spoke to me or Lilly. Lilly asked her what was wrong and she just said she was tired and ready for bed. I was worried and anxious. Some things never changed. Bella's eyes when she was sad was one of them. I threw the covers off myself and sat up. Slowly I walked to the window and looked around. So many nights I had thought about going to Bella's house and seeing if she still left her window unlocked. So many times when I was away in New York I had thought about the nights I spent in her bed. Nothing made me feel lonelier than sleeping without her and now to be right down the street from her and have us still be a world apart was something I couldn't take. I quickly got dressed in a fleece pull over and jeans. Quietly I made my way out of the house and down the sidewalk to Bella's yard.

Bella~

I took another deep breath of night air laying on my bed. Lilly talked non stop about Edward from the moment he left until her eyes closed. Jake's words haunted me. I felt foolish. I should of known it wasn't me he wanted. He only came around after he figured out Lilly was his. I was so stupid to believe he had loved me all these years.

"Idiot! Idiot!Idiot!" I cursed myself once again. I clicked on the baby monitor and went outside to sit on Lilly's swing set. Along time ago, before I got my heart broken I used to go to our meadow and lay in the grass to think but now it was to painful. I settled for my daughters swing set instead. I clipped the monitor to the waist of my jeans and sat down leaning my head against the plastic covered chain. I rocked back and fourth on my heels making the swing move a tiny bit. A million important things and a million tiny things clouded my mind but Jakes words were still there. I wasn't sure what upset me more, the fact that I had fallen for it or the fact that Jake pointed out what I refused to see. I wanted to be mad at him for bringing it up but in a way it was good to know what it looked like from the outside looking in. Lilly was crazy about Edward but that didn't mean he and I had to be anything other than what we were, Ex's that happened to share a child. My chest ached more than I was willing to admit at the thought of us not being together. It was a scenario I had envisioned a thousand times, it was always different but it ended the same. I closed my eyes and saw it once again. Edward walks up to me on the crowded street. He caress's my face and looks deep in my eyes. His green eyes are beautiful but with a sheen of emotion to them this time. He utters the words I've missed hearing for seven years,

"You're the one Bella, it's always been you. I love you. Please take me back." his words are barely a whisper as I rest my hands on his hips bringing him closer to me. He smiles when his lips brush mine. The world stops for a moment. My skin trembles. I tighten my grip on him and he kisses me deeply, passionately. A kiss of unspoken emotion. A kiss like Romeo would of given Juliet. Our kiss breaks and as tears run down my cheeks I whisper,

"I've felt so alone." he kisses my forehead, my eye lids, my cheeks and finally the tip of my nose, "You'll never be alone again. I'll write you a love story. Just say yes. All I need is yes." I nod happily and smiled wider than I have in years and out loud for everyone to hear I whisper

"Yes." I took a deep breath and opened my eyes. It was a fantasy and it would stay that way. Things like that didn't really happen to single mom's with coffee houses to run and a life to keep a float. I blew out a frustrated breath. I closed my eyes, picturing it again and cursing myself for being an idiot once again.

Edward~

Bella's gate was never locked. I grimaced slightly reminding myself this was Forks, not Manhattan. The crime rate here only went up when it was hunting season and the hunters weren't paying close enough attention. I closed the gate behind me and noticed a silhouetted figure on Lilly's swing set. Her head was laying on the chain back slumped down. She sighed largely and whispered "Yes." into the night. I wondered for a moment if she was asleep. Dreaming of something that once was or what she hoped for for the future. I hoped she was dreaming of me as selfish as that was. I cleared my throat, attempting not to startle her. She sat up and looked behind her. When she saw it was me she jumped up from the swing,

"What the hell are you doing in my yard? It's after midnight!" she demanded. I smiled,

"I was coming to see if your window is unlocked." I blushed from my hair line to my neck.

"It's not. Hasn't been for years. I can't believe you remember that." she said softly. She took her seat back on the swing. I walked over and took the swing next to her.

"how could I forget? I spent more time in your bed senior year then I did my own." I chuckled at the memory of falling off her trellis more times then not. For the first time since I had come home Bella and I were totally alone. No prying neighbors, no one peeping out there windows. It was just her and I in the moonlight.

"What were you doing when I walked up? You said Yes." I swung back and fourth gently, she did the same.

"It was nothing. So besides checking my window locks what brings you to my yard after midnight?" she asked me. I mulled it over for a moment, trying to pick just the right words.

"Lilly told me tonight my Dad gave her the bear she is always carrying around. Is that true?" I hedged, there was no easy way into this conversation.

"Yeah. He gave it to her for her last birthday. She takes it every where. Wont even let me wash the damn thing." I nodded,

"She said my Dad told her Pinkies heart is a key." Bella rolled her eyes,

"Yeah. I've heard that one. Lilly loves to make up little stories. I am sure it's nothing." I stopped swinging and stood up. I moved over and knelt in front of Bella. She looked down at me with wide sad eyes. "I don't think it's nothing. I have a lock box in the trunk of my car with no key. It was given to me and only me. Bella. I think the key to that box is in Lilly's bear. I hate to say it but I really need that key." Bella arched one eye brow,

"Your dad left the key to something inside my daughters toy?" she clearly thought I was making something out of nothing. I stood up and paced for a moment,

"I am so angry with him for doing it but yes, I think Lilly has the key. I need that key." even at this late hour I could feel time slipping by me. My mother would find someone to help her change his will If I didnt do something soon.

"And what exactly is in this box?" she wondered. She crossed her arms over her chest and pursed her lips.

"I don't know. Could be nothing. Could be everything. My mother is working pretty hard to find a lawyer to help her defraud his will. Whatever is in that box is worth committing estate fraud over. If my mother is willing to commit a felony I need to get in that box." I ran a hand through my hair and waited for Bella to say something. She stood up and silently walked up to the house,

"You comin? Or am I performing surgery alone?" she called to me. I ran in two big strides up the deck to her door. Bella closed and locked the door behind us. I took a deep breath,

"Man your house smells the same. Like a fire place. That's amazing. Somethings really don't change." I whispered. She sadly replied, "A lot of things do change though. Stay here, ill be back in a second." she climbed the stairs quietly. I noticed pictures sitting on the mantle. I walked over and looked at each one. Lilly was a gorgeous baby with pale white skin and big green eyes. There were pictures of everyone holding her but none of her and Bella until later in her life. She looked to be about a year old in one picture. Bella was paper thin. Almost emaciated. Bella cleared her throat behind me. I turned and saw her holding the bear in one hand and a pair of scissors in the other. She jerked her head towards the kitchen. I followed silently behind her. She laid the bear face down on the table and gently cut up the seam in it's back. For some reason it was almost painful to watch. When it done the bear laid back open in front of us.

"You gonna stick your hand in there or are you gonna be a girl about it?" she chided me. I shoved my hand inside the bear being careful as to not knock the stuffing out. My fingers moved around it's cotton insides until I felt it between my fingers. Hard metal. A key. I pulled it out and showed it to Bella. She took it from my hand and examined it under the moonlight,

"Doesn't look like much." she shrugged and handed it back to me. She was to beautiful standing there. It was dark, moonlight poured in every window. It bounced off her hair. It made her skin almost sparkle. Something inside me snapped and I couldn't take it anymore. I had to kiss her. I had to feel her mouth on mine. Everything else could wait. Kids and keys and unanswered questions would be there in the morning but this moment alone with Bella wouldn't be. My heart was pounding. I tightened my fingers around the key and caressed Bella's face with my free hand. Her lips parted. Her big brown eyes fluttered closed.

"Edward." she whispered like a prayer. I leaned down and gently brushed my lips over hers. She was hesitant for a moment until I leaned into her pressing her tail bone against the table. I brushed my lips over hers again, this time letting the tip of my tongue graze the seam of her perfect lips. She purred deep in her chest. I smiled wide and deepened the kiss. I dropped the key on the floor and wrapped both my arms around her. She scooted back on the table and spread her legs for me. I planted my hands on the table. Bella wrapped her legs around my waist tightly. I rubbed her sides bringing her closer to me. Her hands caressed my shoulders and down my chest. I broke the kiss gasping for air. Gently I rested my forehead against hers. She licked her lips and tried to speak between pants,

"Some things don't change. You are still the best kisser...." I blushed again. I ran my thumb across her cheek bone. "i know you aren't ready yet but I want us to be together." I whispered and kissed her forehead. Bella shook her head side to side,

"Edward, it's not me you want. You are just all caught up in being a father. I only look good to you because Lilly and I are a package deal in your mind." she said sadly and pulled away from me.

"That's not true at all. I wanted you from the moment I saw you in the coffee house. I never stopped wanting you. You are the only one I've ever wanted." I said sternly, careful not to yell. She stood up from the table and took a step back from me,

"If I am the only one you ever wanted then where were you for seven years? I can understand the first year and maybe the second but seven years? I am supposed to believe that for seven years you were in the biggest city in the untied states just pining away for the mousy girl back home? I was born at night not last night Edward. You've got your key now go home so I can forget this ever happened." she looked down at the floor as she spoke.

"I don't want to forget it. I want it to happen all the time. I want to be the man in your life and the man in Lilly's. You are all I've ever wanted." Bella opened the back door and looked up at me,

"goodnight Edward." I picked my key up off the floor and walked to her. Slowly I kissed her cheek before I left her. Knowing Bella didn't believe she was the love of my life made the box and the key feel very insignificant.

Saturday morning I yawned into my fist. It was to damn early to be up but Emmett wanted to get to work so I was sitting on the stone step to my newly bug bombed, vermin free and professionally cleaned house. Emmett's truck barreled into the drive way with a screech of it's breaks. I looked up in enough time to see a sleep deprived Emmett get out of his truck and grab a sledge hammer from the back.

"Uh good morning. Are we planning on breaking things today?" I asked cautiously. Emmett pushed past me and went into the house without a word. I jumped up and watched him lift the hammer high over his head then slam it down into a rotting stair step. I jumped back into the open door frame.

"Lost my job yesterday." he grunted and destroyed another step. My mouth gaped and my eyes bugged,

"You're kidding? Why?" I asked. He destroyed another rotting step,

"Wouldn't turn my back on you. It was a fucking.....shitty....no good bastard of a day. I am going to beat the hell out of your steps and then build new ones."

"Wouldn't turn your back on me? What do I have to do with anything?" Emmett picked up his hammer and went at another step with all his strength. The walls around us shook.

"Didn't want me to help you. Jake wants this to fail so you'll leave and he can have Bella back. I wouldn't play his game so he fired me. Rose lost the bar because she wouldn't talk me out of helping you and she wouldn't encourage Bella to get back with Jake." he took another whack at the stairs.

"Oh my god." I was stunned beyond words. I had cost Em his job and Rose her dream.

"Yeah like I said, it was a bad day." The ancient wood flew away from the force of his blows. I pulled my keys from my pocket. Emmett wiped the sweat from his brow with the back of his hand, "If you are going out take my truck and go by the hardware store. They have an order ready for me." he tossed me his keys and I walked out to his truck and climbed inside. As I drove down the street to the main part of town I started thinking I had to do something. I couldn't let Em and Rose suffer because of me.

I could see Rose sitting at the counter talking to Alice and Bella when I pulled Em's truck up to the curb. Rose was talking harshly and pointing her index finger into the counter. Bella was clearly angry on her behalf and was gesturing back to her. Reluctantly I climbed out of the truck and walked inside.

"Morning Ladies." I said softly. I could tell they were both angry and ready to take it out on someone. I didn't want it to be me.

"I guess you've heard by now." Rose said hatefully.

"I am so sorry." I said.

"That's the theme of the day." Rose sipped the coffee Bella poured for her.

"I'm going to go talk to Carlisle on Monday. I would really like it if you could come with me. Legally you have to have some rights even if it's just for back wages or something. He can't do this to you." I shoved my hands in my pockets and kept my eyes down. Being the only man in a room full of angry women was awkward to say the least.

"What about Emmett's job? Can Carlisle help with that?" Alice asked sweetly and rubbed Rose's back.

Rose laughed harshly, "No. Em's job is just screwed. They got him on a contract violation. There loss. He was the best they had." Alice laid her spiky hair on Rose's shoulder. I reached over timidly and rubbed Rose's shoulder. Bella returned to the counter. "If I could of just sucked it up until Billy signed over the bar...." Bella eyes never left the counter.

"Bella what they did is insane. You couldn't be with someone you didn't care about just to ensure Rose getting the bar." Alice chided.

"I refuse to let you blame yourself. I don't think he was ever going to sign it over to me. I think this was his way of getting a free bar tender."

"I wish you would of gotten something in writing." Bella said sadly.

"Me too but even if I had he probably would of found a loop hole. Ever since Harry Clearwater passed away they have all turned into a bunch of crooked bastards." Rose's eyes narrowed.

"Edward!" Lilly called happily. She ran in from Alice's store carrying the dirty pink bear with her. All the adults in the room cleaned up the tears and tired expressions. Hopefully to Lilly everything looked fine. I knelt down and opened my arms for her. She ran into them flinging the dirty bear against me. I wrapped my arms around her in a tight hug. It hadn't even been twelve hours since the football game but I missed her. There was still so much I didn't know. She leaned back and looked at me, "I wanted to call you but Mommy said no." she said brightly. All three womens attention was fixed on us. My every move was being watched.

"Really? Why is that?" I wondered. She smiled bigger,

"She said your busy. Are you to busy to see me?" she pouted, looking almost hurt. I wanted to make her smile again. her smile melted my heart and made me want to give her everything and more. I wanted to spoil her truly rotten. I nodded slowly and thought of the appropriate answer.

"I am never ever to busy for you." I tickled her making her break out into an hysterical fit of giggles. Alice sat up straighter on the stool and smiled wide,

"You know what we need?" "A stiff drink?" Rose grumbled. Alice laughed musically,

"No. girls night. We haven't had one in forever. Let's go out to dinner and a movie!" her eyes shone with excitement over her idea. Any moment she would start bouncing and clapping.

"I don't have anything to do tonight. This is going to be my first Saturday night off in god knows how long." Rose said. Bella stopped wiping down a table and sighed,

"I can't go. I don't have a baby sitter." As the words left Bella's lips a show of silent communication went on between Alice and Lilly. Alice nodded once and smiled. Lilly's smile widened. I knew what they were thinking,

"I'll watch her. I'd love to do it." Bella's eyes widened, "I couldn't impose on you like that. You're busy with your house and everything." Lilly squirmed from my arms and ran over to her mother. Alice walked over to my side.

"Oh Mommy! Please! I want to see Edward's house and I want to watch movies with him." Lilly whined. Bella's mouth opened to protest as Alice began to speak,

"Edward's a smart guy. He won't let her eat lead paint or anything. Besides it's only for a couple of hours. Dinner movie home. Piece of cake, right Edward?" Alice laid her elbow into my side prompting me to speak,

"Yes. Yes. Perfectly fine. I'll take her with me now if that will make things easier for you." I gave her a smile. She sighed again looking into our faces. "If that's what she wants. I guess that's fine." Bella's words made Lilly let out an excited squeal she must have picked up from Alice. No one squealed like that except Alice. Lilly ran to get her things. I was going to have my daughter for an entire day and I had no idea what do with her.

I glanced at Lilly from the corner of my eye. She watched the town passing by us as if she had never seen it before. What was I going to do with her for an entire day? Thankfully the night before she had done most of the talking but now she seemed content to just be quiet and watch her world pass by out the passenger window. I pulled up in front of the hardware store. Lilly clapped and undid her seat belt.

"You didn't say we were going to the hardware store! I love the hardware store!" she grabbed pinkie and got out before I could help her. It was then that something crossed my mind, this was the first time I would be seen in public with her. The football game was easy, we were surrounded by a crowd and easily masked but here in the busiest place in town on a Saturday there was no coverage. No where to hide. The town gossip mill would spin out of control while tongues wagged over the long lost Edward Masen taking Bella Swan's daughter to run errands with him. Assumptions would be made of course. The assumption being that Bella and I were back together. I wanted it to be true but only if she did too. I walked around the truck and grabbed Lilly's hand. She pulled me in the store with all her might.

"Lil, do you come to the hardware store often?" I asked while the door closed behind me.

"Hi Miss Lilly!" the cashier called. Lilly greeted her back poiletly with a wave. I smiled a bit.

"I come here with my Uncle Emmett all the time. He's the best at fixing houses. Everybody says so." she informed me.

"I am lucky to have him then, aren't I?" Lilly giggled pulling me over to the customer service desk. She put her arms up for me to lift her so she could see over the counter. I picked her up, she smiled wide "Order for McCarty please. The trucks out front." she informed the gray haired man at the counter. He laughed a moment and shook his head,

"Yes ma'am Miss Lilly. Someone will be right out. Will this be cash or charge?" he asked her. She mulled it over a moment as if she were seriously going to pay the bill,

"Put it on my tab." she said with a wave of her hand. I laughed, pulled out my wallet and handed the older man my black American express.

"I'd like to pay off whatever tab Emmett has and please put the number on file for any future orders he may have." the older man whistled, "Mighty generous of you. Suppose you've heard about his job." he shook his head and ran the card handing me a slip to sign when he was done. I sat Lilly on the counter and signed on the line.

"Yes. He's working on my house now but after that I'm not sure what he'll do." I said sadly. He handed me back the card and gave Lilly a sucker. She stuffed it in her pocket for later. "He's the best damn contractor in town. He was wasting his time working for those crooks anyways. You tell him if he needs work to let me know. There's a lot of people in this town needing home repairs but can't afford Blackwaters prices." I was confused. If they did bad business how did they stay afloat?

"Crooks?" I questioned. The old man nodded,

"Every last one of them except Emmett. He refused to use substandard building supplies. That's why he couldn't ever get ahead from what I hear. And I hear _a lot_." I for once was glad for small town gossip. "Well thank you for the information and i'll be sure to let Emmett know there's work to be had." a plan swirled in my brain. A way to help Emmett and Rose but also give Jake and his crew what they had coming. I couldn't wait to tell Em.

A/N- thanks for all the reviews and I am sorry this chapter is so incredibly late. Life's been crazy around here. We are opening the box next chapter!


	13. Chapter 13

Edward~

Emmett nailed another step in place and looked at me funny, "You want to do what?" I repeated my idea again for him, "I want to start a construction company." I said. Lilly was playing outside with her bear. I could see her from where I was standing. She wanted a tour of the house and I fully intended to give her one as soon as I pitched my idea to Em.

"Edward, you don't know anything about construction. That's why I am remodeling your house." he pointed out the obvious. A shit eating grin spread over my face, "I don't want to do it alone. I want you to be my partner." I sat down beside him, "You wanted to own your own business, didn't you?" I rested my folded arms on my knees. "Well yeah but Edward it takes a lot of money to do something like that. I don't have that kind of money." I nodded in agreement. "I do though and I have a feeling when all this will stuff is taken care of I'll have even more. Plus as long as the book is in print I'll keep getting checks from that. We could do this Em. We could give the town of forks a home repair business that will offer them fair prices with quality materials. After what I did to this town it's the least I could do." it was time I gave something back to the town of Forks. I owed them this much.

"It's an honorable idea Edward but I don't have the buy in money. I will never have that kind of money." Emmett said. I smiled, "Em ever since I came back here you have been consistently supportive. You've been an excellent friend to me and I owe you this. I want to do this." I slapped him on the back. His brow furrowed,

"you want me to work for you?" he said. I laughed,

"No. I want you to be my partner. I'll handle the money, you'll handle the labor."

"I don't know. It's a lot of money." Em said.

"Money is nothing to worry about. Just think about it, okay?" I asked. He nodded. I smiled and stood up to go outside and get Lilly. I wanted her to see the house.

Bella~

Rose drove us to Port Angeles for dinner and a movie after what felt like hours of Alice doing my make up. I never understood why I was expected to sit through the hours of primping for dinner and a movie. Alice insisted it was all part of the girls night experience. I wasn't in the mood to argue with her or anyone else. It was stupid to let Edward kiss me because now I couldn't get the feeling of his lips off mine. I swore his sweet scent was still all around me no matter how many showers I took. My emotions were battling inside me. I had kissed Edward and felt more in those moments than I had felt in seven years. It was like being woken up from a coma and then slapped in the face a moment later. I could still hear Jakes words in my head. I felt alone, lost, confused and I didn't know if telling my friends everything would make it better or worse. We were seated at a small Italian restaurant waiting for the bottle of wine we ordered. Rose was silent. She had so much on her mind. I felt terrible that her dream had ended and I could be to blame. She had told me it wasn't my fault. She said it wasn't anyone's fault but seeing her so sad made me feel like it was my fault. It was my ex-boyfriend that did this to her. Alice was bubbly and full of energy as usual. She eyed both of us as the waiter poured red wine in our glasses and took our orders. Mushroom ravioli for me, steak Alfredo for Rose and Alice was having spaghetti and meatballs. I drank my wine, not sipped it, drank it. Probably a little to fast because my stomach was empty and my head was starting to feel numb. Something I discovered along time ago was that numb was always better than pain. I remembered pain and I could say without a doubt that numb was better. Alice blew out a breath and sat back in her chair,

"Some girls night this is turning into. I am out with mopey one and mopey two." she mumbled. Rose moaned unhappily,

"I'm sorry. I am just kicking myself for wasting so much time on that place. It's so stupid but I really did love it and now it feels like my dream is over." I sympathized with her. I knew what it was like to lose a dream.

"You are still young! We all are! There is still time to do whatever you want in life. This isn't the end. It's a new beginning." Alice said to her. I wanted to roll my eyes but didn't. Alice couldn't help being an optimist. Alice offered Rose her hand and she took it, giving it a little squeeze. "

I know exactly what you mean, Rose. I can't believe this is my life." a lump rose in my throat. I poured another glass of wine and drank it down quickly.

"You have a nice life." Alice said her brow furrowed in confusion.

"I love my daughter. I wouldn't trade her for anything but the rest of it...I don't know." I said softly. Rose reached for my hand, I let her take it.

"Tell us what's wrong. Please." Rose squeezed my fingers gently. I blew out a breath and began, "a month ago life was simple. Lilly, you guys, Dad, the coffee house and now it's like everything is the same but radically different. It's so confusing." I kept my eyes on the table cloth,

"For seven years I've fantasied about Edward coming back to town. For seven years I've envisioned how it would be. In my perfect version he comes back and is overcome with feelings for me and he wants me. Not Lilly, not our friends, just me. It's selfish and it's stupid but that's what I wanted." I closed my eyes for a moment and fought the urge to cry.

"Honey he does want you." Alice reminded me softly. I laughed harshly and looked up at the ceiling, "No. he wants Lilly. He thinks he has to take us both to get her and if he were any other man in my life he'd be right but I really wanted him to just see me. Just me. I cant decide what's worse. Him being here and faking his feelings for me to see my kid or him being in New York not thinking about me at all. I honestly think I'd rather have him be gone. Him being here is killing me." I sniffed and wiped my tears away,

"Rose I am so sorry I am going on like this. You've had a seriously shitty twenty four hours and I am whining about Edward." Rose smiled and squeezed my hand again,

"I think your issues are way bigger than the bar." Alice's back stiffened,

"Is that what Jake told you last night? He told you Edward only wanted Lilly?" I sniffed again and poured myself some more wine,

"He was just telling me how it looked from the outside and he's right. Edward didn't see me at his Dad's funeral. I was less than a foot from him. I could of reached out and touched him and he didn't even see me. Before he came here he wouldn't of known me if I was walking down the street and now he is staying here forever and he loves my kid and my kid loves him. Which effectively means I am going to have to deal with him until she turns eighteen. Eventually he will fall in love with someone else and I'll have to watch that too." my breath came hard and fast in my chest. I slammed my hand down on the table,

"Why am I the only one suffering between the two of us? Why does he get my kid? And why does he get to fall in love with someone else when the only one I've ever loved is him? He ruined my life and now he gets to have a life here, in my town with my friends and my kid and my frickin house!" I balled my hand up into a fist and hit the table,

"It's not fair! This isn't fair. It's all so unfair." Alice rolled her eyes,

"Bella he isn't going to fall in love with anyone else. He loves you."

"Yeah he loves me so much." I said sarcastically.

"He does Bella. You can see it when he looks at you. It was the same look he would get whenever you walked down the hallway in school. Like lust and love and utter adoration all rolled into a single look." Alice said quietly. I wiped my eyes and put my napkin back in my lap,

"Whatever. I don't even think I believe in true love anymore. Soul mates. True love. It's all bull shit. That's why my Dad has been alone for over twenty years. He knows it's crap too. I am just going to live with Dad forever and when Lilly is grown up we will be two grown loveless losers living in Forks until we die." the mental image came into my mind of Dad and I sitting in front of the flat screen watching baseball until one of us died. It was almost as depressing as my revaluation that Edward will fall in love with someone else. The waiter brought our meals and we were all silent as we ate. I didn't really eat. I cut my food up and pushed it around my plate while I drank the contents of our second bottle of wine for the evening. Rose finished first and pushed her plate out of the way. She folded her arms across the table and looked at me earnestly,

"What happened to bring all this on? Was it just Jake or was there more to this than we know?" I downed the rest of my glass of wine, trying to ignore Rose's question. Alice pushed her plate away and leaned in towards me,

"I think there's more....." they waited patiently for me to confess to them what I had done.

"He kissed me last night." I said softly. Rose sucked in a shocked breath. Alice giggled happily.

"So?" Rose inquired.

"So what?" I said clearly irritated.

"How was the kiss?" Alice said with a beaming smile. I thought it over for a moment. I could almost feel him on my skin again.

"None of the sex I've had in the last two years was as hot as that kiss. I thought my body was going to explode." I looked up at the ceiling and noticed it was spinning. It was in this moment I realized I was very drunk and was very glad I hadn't touched my dinner.

"Why didn't you guys....you know..." Rose said. I put my hand over my eyes leaning my head back against my chair,

"I was on the dining room table with my legs around his waist. If my father and daughter hadn't been sleeping upstairs I probably would of lost my mind and done him right there." I laid my arm across my eyes and willed the room to slow down. Alice laughed,

"You almost had sex with Edward in the chiefs dining room? Nice!" I shook my head,

"It's not going to happen again. I'll make sure of it. I can't take this feeling." I knew kissing Edward again would be bad. For me and for him and everyone involved. I couldn't let it happen again.

"I think you should sleep with him and get it out of your system." Rose said and smiled. Rose and Emmett found sex to be a cure all to most things. It was right up there with aspirin and antibiotics.

"Sex does not fix everything." I reminded her.

"Most things." Rose shrugged.

"Rose she can't just sleep with him. Her feelings are involved." Alice reminded her gently.

"Thank you Al." I said.

"Now if she wanted to make out with him a little like horny high schoolers that's a totally different story." Alice said. Both she and Rose broke out into a fit of laughter. I moaned,

"Will you two please just take me home? I think I've had enough female bonding for one night."

"Sure Sweetie. I'll keep Lilly for you tonight too." Alice said happily. I remembered who she was with and looked at Alice seriously, "Not a word to Edward. Pick my kid up. Be polite and that's it. No meddling." I warned her. She put her hands up in surrender.

It didn't take us long to get back to my house with Rose driving. Alice was parked at Rose's house so the plan was for them to walk me to the door and then head back there. They asked me several times to come back there and crack open a bottle of wine with them but I had had enough and knew it was time for bed. When we pulled up in front of my house I noticed an unfamiliar car in the drive way. My brow furrowed and it gave Alice the opportunity to say what I was thinking. "I thought the chief was going out tonight." I stared at the parked car trying to decide who it belonged too. "oh my god, Bella. What if the chief has a girl in there?" Rose giggled. The thought of it made my stomach flip. My Dad didn't date. He was a dateless, loveless loser like me and if he was dating he might actually like her and want to do something stupid like move in with her or get married. I bit my lower lip trying to decide what to do. I laughed, "No. the chief doesn't date. We are lone wolves. I am going in the house. Night guys." I got out of Rose's car and stumbled up the steps. The front door was unlocked. The lights in the main living room were off but there was movement in the room. It sounded like clothing rustling over furniture fabric. I squeezed my eyes shut tight and flipped the light switch on by the front door. The rustling stopped. I opened one eye slowly. My Dad was in a full on make out embrace with Sue Clearwater.

"Oh dear god." I said. There was nothing else to say. I was to drunk and strung out on my emotions to deal with them in this moment. I very quickly turned and ran up the steps. I stumbled and fell with a thud twice before I made it to my room. I shut the door behind me.

"Ew. Ew ew ew ew!" I said out loud to the empty room. I sat down on my bed and put my head in my hands. I heard someone pull out of the driveway. A moment later my Dad came in my room.

"Are you okay?" he asked me. I forced myself to be a mature adult and look at him. His cheeks were flushed and pink from making out or the embarrassment of being caught, I wasn't sure which.

"I'm fine Dad." I mumbled. He ran rubbed the back of his neck and sighed,

"You've probably got questions. I'm um sure I would if it was my Dad. I'll be downstairs if you want to talk." he turned and walked away from my door. I blew out a breath and followed slowly behind him.

I sat numbly in the kitchen. My dad pulled a beer from the fridge for himself and one for me. He slid mine to me. I popped the top on it. He stood across from me leaning on the counter sipping his beer slowly.

"So um how long has this been going on?" I asked him. I took a big drink of vitamin R and sat the can down on the counter.

"Three months give or take. We ran into each other and it just sort of happened. I'm sorry I didn't tell you." he took another big drink of his beer keeping his eyes down.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I wondered out loud. I took a long pull off the beer and waited a long moment for his answer.

"I started to a few times but then Edward Sr died and Edward came back to town. I didn't want to make your life anymore complicated than it had to be. I know this is weird for you." Dad rubbed the back of his neck staring at the ceiling.

"it's weird but fine. I didn't know you were dating..." I racked my brain for signs over the last few months but everything seemed ordinary.

"I wasn't....I mean I haven't before..." he shrugged not knowing what else to say.

"Are you in love with her?" I asked hesitantly.

"Yes." he said softly. Tears filled my eyes because of the next question I had to ask, "You want to marry her don't you?" I fought back the sob rising in my chest.

"Eventually, yes. Bell's you have to understand this wasn't easy for me. I am still very much in love with your mom and I think about her all the time. A lot of things have to happen before I can marry Sue." he came around the counter and sat down across from me. I wiped my eyes with the back of my hand,

"Like what?" I said. He smiled wide which was unusual for Dad,

"Well I want her to get to know you and Lilly. I need to spend some time with Leah and Seth. She's got kids too that don't know anything about us. It hasn't been long since their Dad passed and well we don't want to be disrespectful to his memory." I nodded slowly,

"Well I'm happy for you if this is what you want." I couldn't tell him what I really felt. It was to selfish to say he was leaving me all alone and he was interfering with my plan of us being old dateless losers together. He stood up and opened his arms for me. I walked into them and let him hold me. I pulled away and went upstairs before I started crying again.

Edward~

Lilly and I had a great day together. She was so beautiful and smart. I showed her the house. She gave me decorating tips. I told her she could come over and help me paint when the time came. She happily agreed and told me what colors each room should be. Bella and I discussed decorating the house a million times and Lilly's ideas were very close to Bella's. I reached out and gently moved a lock of bronze brown hair off her face. She looked more like Bella when she was sleeping. Alice picked Lilly up. I was disappointed I didn't get to see Bella but Alice said she wasn't feeling well so they took her home. Alice tool Lilly back to her place for the night so Bella could rest. The urge to go and see if Bella was in her back yard was over whelming but I had another matter to attend to. I had to open the box. I paced back and fourth in front it. It was sitting in the middle of my bed at my Mom's house. I held the key tightly in my fist and tried to muster the courage to open it. I sat down on the bed and pulled the box into my lap. It was small but it felt like it weighed a hundred pounds. My hand shook when I slid the key into lock and turned it. The sound of latch popping made me jump. I pushed the lid back and on top was a copy of his will. I pushed it to the side and underneath were yellowed news paper clippings. I held one under the light. It was my birth announcement. I put it to the side and picked up the next one. It was Lilly's. The third one I picked up was Alice's. I read it over twice to make sure it was the same Alice. My Alice. Why in the hell was he holding on to Alice's birth announcement? I picked up his will and skimmed over it not really knowing what I was reading. I folded it back up and placed it in the lid of the box. That's when I saw the envelopes, four of them. One for me, one for Lilly, One for Bella and one for Alice. I picked mine up and opened it.

"_My dearest son, if you are reading this I am gone. I regret not being able to tell you these things in person but what I have to say your mother wouldn't allow you to hear. As I am sure you know by now, you have a daughter. Lilly is a joy and everything I could of asked for in a grand daughter. What you probably haven't heard yet....what your mother doesn't want you hear is that a long time ago, before we could of ever known how your life would of unfolded I had a laps in judgment. I fathered a child with another woman. What's worse is that I'm not sorry. I loved her. I loved your mother too. I couldn't chose between them so I choose honor and stayed with my wife. I was banned from seeing my child, my daughter, Alice_." I dropped the letter on to the bed. My mouth gaped. Alice was my half sister.

**A/n- thank you for all the reviews and favorites! I worked hard on this chapter. I have to say it's one of my favorite things I've ever written. I hope you enjoy it. Show your love with reviews! **


	14. Chapter 14

I don't own Twilight.

Edward~

My Dad said some really beautiful things in the letter but mostly I was still taken a back. I paced my room trying to make sense of it all night but I couldn't wrap my head around it. I repeated the facts again in my head. One- my Father had an affair. According to his letter he loved Cindy Brandon and my Mother. He loved them both but could only have one. He chose Mom. Two-the by product of his affair was Alice. Mary Alice Brandon who I had known since the first day of kindergarten. And three-the people had known about this my entire life and kept me in the dark.

I decided as the sun came up the best thing to do was to take all of it to Carlisle. He would know what to do and how to do it. I would have to confront my mother but before that I had to decide whether or not to tell Alice. I goggled Cindy Brandon to see if I could find any claims to outstanding child support or anything linking her to my father. The only thing I found was her obituary. She moved to Florida a few years ago and was killed in a car accident. Hit by a drunk driver. Alice had lost her mother and a father she didn't know she had within the space of three years. Growing up it never seemed odd to me that Alice didn't have a father. Her mother simply said her father divorced her before she was born. Alice never knew anything different so I guess it never occurred to her to care. She wasn't the type to get angry or hold a grudge against the man her mother said had left them. I had to wonder if this would change the way Alice viewed her life. Would it change her as a person to find out she had been screwed out of having a relationship with her Dad? I gathered all the papers up and went down to the car in the same clothes I had worn the day before. I climbed behind the wheel and drove to Carlisle's office.

He wasn't there yet which gave me a moment to lay my head back and think. The simple answer was yes, I had to tell Alice. Its a good given right to know where you come from. It may even help down the road if some where in her bloodline, out bloodline, she finds out she has a genetic disease or something. Bottom line, she had a right to know no matter what my reasons for telling her but how do I tell her? How do you tell a person whom you love like family that they are your family? This would effect more than just she and I. She was related to Lilly now as well. No longer Aunt Alice by title, she was Aunt Alice by blood. Carlisles Mercedes pulled into the spot next to my car. I waited for him to cut the engine and then climbed out of my car.

"Edward! My boy! It's early. Is everything alright?" his face held a look of concern and then when I handed him my father's will he looked alarmed.

"Where did you get this?" he asked me in a hushed tone. He looked around for anyone who may see us. It was to early for the hussel and bustle of morning traffic on main street.

"It was in the box along with some other interesting things. Can we please go inside?" I asked him. He walked ahead of me quickly and unlocked the door.

Carlisle sat head in his hands and poured over the will once again. We had been at this for over two hours and we still weren't through it all.

"The will is iron clad. He's provided for you, Mary Alice Brandon and Lilly Swan." he told me.

"Provided for?" I questioned. Money didn't matter to me but I knew for sure it would matter to Bella and Alice.

"Lilly gets a college education, a very very generous education and a trust fund when she turns thirty. He's left express wishes the amount not be disclosed. He has requested his life insurance, totaling over 1.2 million dollars be split equally between the three of you." I sat in front of him eyes wide, my body numb.

"The three of us?" I said in shock.

"Your Mother, Alice and you. The three of you will be splitting 1.2 million dollars."

"I can't believe this. I have a sister. Did you know about this?" I asked him. Carlisle shook his head, "I found out they were having an affair. I always thought they ended it and Cindy had gotten pregnant by her husband. We all thought he was a rotten bastard when he left. What kind of man does that? Leaves his pregnant wife. Elizabeth demanded he fire Cindy which no one contested seeing as how they were having an affair. These make sense now." he opened his center desk drawer and pulled out a paper clipped bundle of what looked like canceled checks.

"Where did you get these?" I pulled the clip off and quickly thumbed through them. They were all made out to Cindy Brandon. It looked to be around eighteen years worth of canceled checks.

"Your Mother never came to clean out the office so I did it for her. I was trying to be helpful. I couldn't figure out why he had been giving Cindy money for so long but now it makes sense."

"It was child support." I muttered. Carlisle nodded.,

"Are you going to tell her?" he asked me. I sighed, "I think she has a right to know. Don't you?" He folded his hands and laid them in his lap, "I think his last wish was for the two of you to know." I couldn't argue with that logic. I asked Carlisle to excuse me for a moment and stepped out to his outer office. My hand shook while I dialed the number to Alice's store.

"This is Alice Brandon." she said in her happy chirp of a voice.

"Hi Ali. It's Edward. I am going to Seattle later today to get some things for the house and I need your opinion." I was going to have to go to Seattle eventually to get basic things like pots, pans, furniture and today seemed like a good as time as any.

"Sure! Name the time and you can pick me up." Alice's voice beamed through the phone.

"How about noon?" I said.

"Perfect. I'll see you then." I walked back into the office still numb but hopeful that soon I wouldn't be handling this alone.

Alice talked non stop most of the way to Seattle. I tried to make conversation but it was hard. I was very distracted.

"Edward you are being weird." she informed me when we pulled up in front of the mall. I stopped dead in my tracks,

"What do you mean? I'm not being weird. I'm not being anything." I said defensively.

"You were way to quiet on the drive. Is everything okay?" she asked me. We walked towards Macy's. I stayed silent and opened the door for her.

"Is this about Bella?" she asked me.

"Um..." I was at a loss for words. I should of just spit it out but I didn't want her to have a panic attack in Macy's. Alice kept walking to home furnishings.

"I told her I wouldn't meddle." She said absently looking over a set of sheets. She sat them back on the shelf and kept moving. I walked helplessly behind her.

"Meddle in what?" I asked finally. Alice smiled, "Your relationship of course or lack of one from what Bella says. Can I ask you something?" she looked over some pillow cases and sat them back down.

"Sure." I said nervously. I shoved my hands in my pockets to hide the shaking.

"What is your issue? Could you make a move already? She rolled her eyes and smiled.

"I kissed her....she said I didn't want her. She thinks I just want her for Lilly." I added quietly.

"Dumbest thing I've ever heard but whatever. Bella is Bella. She's always gonna be Bella. Full of self doubt. She's so silly sometimes. What size is your bed?" she asked me. The rapid subject change threw me, "What?" I asked in confusion.

"What size is your bed?" Ali repeated. I shook myself to awareness and smiled, "I don't have one." I reminded her. Alice grinned, "I am furnishing your entire house today?" happiness dripped off of her like melting ice cream on a sunny day.

"Thats the idea." I pulled out my wallet and handed her my American express with no limit. She whistled and snapped her fingers to get a store associates attention.

"I hope you wore good shoes." she said her grin widening as a store worker came to help her. I simply stood back and watched my sister at work.

I was able to relax as the day went on. By dinner time my house was mostly furnished and I had furniture being delivered for every room. She even bought picture frames and some prints to put in them. She thought of things I would never dreamed of. She bought a fancy lotion pump for the master bathroom and when I asked why I couldn't just use lotion from the tube I thought she was going to slap me. After that I just stayed quiet. Somewhere over the ten thousand dollar mark my brain turned off and I lost count of what she spent. I insisted on taking her out to dinner as a way to say thank you for all her help. She never tired. She never ran out of energy. I had to laugh when she got angry at Target for not being open later. I assured her we would have a quick dinner and then be back to shopping. I had been eating all day. There wasn't much else to do at the mall when your money was being spent by someone who didn't need your input. I let her pick the place. She chose a little Italian restaurant not from the high way. I began to get nervous sitting across from her. It was quiet here. I could tell her but how? What should I say?

"You're thinking awful hard over there Masen, it's dinner not a math final. Just order some noodles and lets get back on the road." Alice ordered me.

"Decisions come easy to you don't they?" I smiled a little closing my menu. She shrugged,

"Most of the time. I think if you pay attention the right decision just presents it's self. Just gotta have faith." she smiled at me for a moment and closed her menu. Faith was something I had sorely been lacking for a while.

"Can I asked a loaded question?" Ali sat back in her chair and folded her arms. I took a sip of my water, "Uh huh." I mumbled.

"Why are you doing all of this?" her eyes narrowed.

"All of what?" I knew Alice was perceptive, almost psychic about some things but had I been so easy to read?

"the house and the shopping and the hanging around? I know you said it was so Bella would let you see Lilly but did Bella herself factor into the decision at all or was it just about the kid?"

I didn't like my motives being questioned but I understood why she was doing it. I was glad Bella had someone to watch out for her like Alice did.

"I want them both. Is that wrong?" I asked her. The waiter came. Alice ordered for both of us. I sat silently and let her do it.

"It's not wrong sweetie. You have to remember though, Bella is still a woman. She needs you to make up for lost time. She needs to feel your love." it was sappy but true. I had failed Bella in that department and I needed to make it right.

"I will. I promise." I assured her. This pleased her and she went on to tell me about all the things she had bought. I just smiled and ate my dinner in silence.

My time was coming to a close. We shopped until the stores closed. Alice tried paying them to stay open later but they didn't bite. The trunk and back seat were full of items to small to be shipped. Alice was finally tired and for once quiet in the passenger seat beside me. The drive home seemed shorter than the drive there. I yawned into my fist. Alice yawned and then giggled.

"Thank you again for all your help. I couldn't of done all this by myself." I said quietly.

"Emmett would of helped you." she said with a laugh.

"I shudder to think how that would of turned out." I smiled. Alice laughed again. I turned down her street and parked in front of her house.

"I bought you a house warming gift." she handed me a small hallmark bag.

"You didn't have too." I said. Alice took off her seat belt and turned to face me. Inside the bag was a black picture frame with the words family printed in silver metal letters across the front. A lump rose In my throat.

"I know it's sappy but I was thinking when things finally work out for you and Bella you guys could put your first family photo in it." Alice pointed to the glass front. One hot tear fell against the glass.

"Edward are you okay?" she asked in concern.

"I have to tell you something and I don't know how you'll take it but you have to know. You just have to because I can't do this alone." I said fighting back a sob. I wasn't a crier usually but it was taking everything in me to not break down in front of her.

"Whatever it is we will handle it. I'll be right beside you." she assured me.

"Alice I've done so many terrible things. How could you just forgive me?" I leaned my head back against the seat and shut my eyes.

" I tried to hate you but I couldn't. You and Bella, Rose, Emmett, Jasper. You guys are my family. I could never stay mad at any of you." she whispered trying to calm me.

"what if we really were family?" I asked. She smiled,

"That would be nice, wouldn't it? this is good too." she gently rubbed my shoulder. I shook my head, "No. you and I. What if we really were family?" more tears ran down my cheeks in the dark of the car.

"Edward. What's going on? Your scaring me." Alice's face was drawn. She was probably terrified I had lost my mind. I pulled her letter and a copy of Dad's will from the visor above the drivers seat.

"I received some things after my Dad's death and by his account you're his daughter. My half sister." it felt good to say it out loud but I knew it sounded crazy.

"Edward, that's nuts. My dad left before I was born." she said flatly. I shook my head, "My Dad and your mom were in love. He got your mom pregnant the same time my mom was pregnant with me as far as I can figure. It's all in here I'm sure." I handed her the letter and the will. She unfolded the will and grimaced, "this has to be a mistake." she mumbled. "It's not a mistake but if you want proof we can get a blood test or something. I don't need one but if you do...." I trailed off when she started to cry.

"I don't understand what I'm reading." she whispered.

"Basically what it says is as his heir you inherit a third of his estate. You inherited a third of 1.2 million dollars. He left Lilly a college education and a trust fund."

"He knew?" Alice asked with wide eyes.

"Yeah he knew. He knew she was mine and he knew you were his." I watched as Alice bent over and sobbed. I laid my hand on her shoulder and squeezed.

"My mom never told me. Why didn't she tell me?" she asked between sobs.

"I don't know but we can work together and find out. We can get answers." I told her. She sat up and wiped her face, "I have to go. This is to much. I cant do this. My mom is dead and now your my brother and my dad is dead. It's to much. I'm sorry." she got out of the car quickly and ran to her door. I got out of the car and yelled, "Alice wait!" I slammed the car door shut and ran to the yard. She flew inside the house and slammed the door. I wiped my hands down my face and cursed. I ran up the steps and beat on the door with my fist. She didn't answer. All I could hear was the sound of her sobbing on the other side of the door. I sat on the top step of her porch with my head in my hands.

_**A/n- I hope this ending doesn't leave you hanging to much. I appreciate all the reviews and I can't wait t see how this chapter is received! **_


	15. Chapter 15

Disclaimer: I don't own twilight.

Bella~

I spent most of Sunday in a hung over stooper just waiting for the time to come when I could close down for the day and go back to bed. As if coming home drunk on Saturday night weren't enough now I would have to deal with my Dad dating Sue Clearwater. I didn't mind him dating I just never really thought he would. Alice and Edward went to Seattle for the day on Sunday. It shouldn't of bothered me but it did. Monday morning came to quickly for my liking. I was standing in the bathroom doing Lilly's hair. Usually I could do simple things to it like pony tails or a braid but today I was to distracted to do anything with it. She looked up at me in the mirror, her arms crossed over her chest. She looked irritated about something but I didn't know what I had done to make her make that sour face.

"What's wrong honey? I thought you wanted a ponytail." I said to her. She looked down at her shoes and shrugged,

"It's fine. I don't really care." she said sullenly. For my daughter not to care about her hair something major had to be wrong. I laid the brush and pony tail holder on the sink. I sat down on the closed toilet lid and pulled her to me. I stroked her hair and looked in her eyes,

"What's wrong?" I asked. She turned her face from me and closed her eyes,

"Nothing. It's just something dumb at school." she bit her lip like I always did when I was about to cry.

"What's going on at school?" I wondered. I was sure it was nothing other than the usual little brats picking on my kid. Lilly took one big step back and looked me dead in the eyes, "It's career day at school. Everyone else is having their Dad's come in and speak. I don't know who my daddy is. No one will tell me and it's not fair! I want to know!" she stomped her foot and balled her tiny hands into stubborn fists.

"Your my baby, remember?" this discussion was nothing new to us. We had been having it at least once a year since she was three. I often thought how easy it would be for me to pawn the question off on her father but until recently that was possible.

"I need a daddy." she said simply. Her bronze hair fell across the shoulders of her bright orange sweater. I looked into her bright green eyes and for the first time I wanted to tell her the truth. My mouth opened but nothing came out. I stuttered for a moment trying to find the right words to tell her Edward, Prince Edward was her father. Luckily, my dad saved me. "Breakfast time! Come on down." he called. Internally I sighed with relief. Lilly stood her ground in front of me, "I want to know." she said. I shook my head, "Baby, let's go have breakfast. It's to early for a stand off." I got up and took her hand bringing her down the steps with me. I could tell she was still mad but neither of us were prepared for what we saw when we came down the last set of stairs. My dad was standing in the living room with his arm around Sue Clearwater. My eyes bugged out of my head for a moment until I remembered my manners.

"Lilly. I want you to meet my friend Sue. She was nice enough to come make breakfast for us so Mom could have a break." Dad informed her. Lilly tentatively let go of my hand and walked over to them. Sue knelt down to Lilly's eye level offering her a hand to shake. "Hello Lilly." she said sweetly. My eyes moved from them over to my Dad. Our eyes met. His expression asked me if this was okay but it didn't matter now. It was done. "Hello." Lilly said just as quiet. Sue smiled wider.

"Sue you know my daughter Bella." He said formally. I walked to them doing my best to look Sue in the eyes after Saturday night.

"It's nice to see you again." I muttered. Sue shook my hand and smiled, her cheeks tinting pink just a little bit. I smiled a little to make her more comfortable. It must of all been to much for Dad. He announced it was time to eat and ushered us all into the kitchen.

Lilly wouldn't speak to me the entire ride to drop her off at school. She slammed the back door to the jeep as she got out. I didn't blame her for being angry. It was like this every time and by the end of the day she would of forgotten all about it. I drove to the coffee house and noticed the lights weren't on. Alice's side was totally closed down and so was mine. Usually Alice was up bright and early ready to work. She was so annoying in the morning sometimes. I got out of the car and turned in a circle, looking all around me for her car. I didn't see it. I walked up to the back door and let myself in. something was wrong. Something felt so off. I couldn't put my finger on it. I walked through flipping on lights as I unlocked the front door for the day. It only took a minute before Rose let herself in.

"Hey. What brings you in so early?" I said with little interest. Rose sat down on a stool at the counter.

"I am not cut out for this house wife bullshit. The minute Emmett leaves for Edwards I am bored out of my mind. I was wondering if maybe you needed some help around here. It cant be much different then tendin bar." she rambled. I reached over patting her shoulder gently.

"Rose if you wanna help out that's fine. I can't afford to pay you though." my mind ran over my finances again.

"That's okay. Turns out my big strong husband is opening his own business." Rose glowed with pride. I gasped, "What! How?" I said. She moved off her stool and came around the counter. She dug around for an apron and put it on as she explained, "Turns out Edward wants a partner. Emmett's gonna be the muscle and Edwards gonna be the brains." Rose said. I stood there for a moment with my jaw hanging open. "Honey are you alright?" she asked. I smiled tightly, "Yep. Today is just full of surprises. Already this morning I had a woman in my kitchen cookin me breakfast and my Dad is dating! Did you know that? DATING!" I threw my hands up. Rose laughed, "The chief? No way. His only steady relationship is with the lake on a Sunday."

"Turns out no. he's all in love with Sue Clearwater. Selfish jackass!" I said. Rose leaned against the counter and grinned, "Harry's widow?" she whistled, "this town will live off that for weeks honey." I put my palms on the counter and moved myself on to it, "Don't I know it. Oh and Lilly is the only little girl without a dad and it turns out as a parent I'm chopped liver. She needs a dad all of a sudden like he's an accessory. She's to little to understand this stuff. And here I sit in the middle of my life and Alice doesn't show up for work. Guess she had so much fun shopping with Edward she couldn't come in today." I said bitterly. I folded my arms over my chest. I felt my lips fall down into a frown. I didn't even try to stop it. I didn't care if the whole town saw me being less then happy.

"So let me understand this. First Lilly wants a Dad. Second your Dad has a girlfriend and she came over this morning. Third you are jealous Edward took Alice shopping in Seattle. Does that cover it?" she asked earnestly.

"Yeah pretty much." I mumbled. Rose smiled, "All these problems are solvable. First, honey let the Lilly Edward thing go. You are both smart capable adults. You can both figure out a way to explain this to the seven year old. Second, your dad dating is awesome. He deserves to be happy. You should be happy for him. And last but not least, the only way for you to not be jealous of Alice and Edward is to tell Edward how you feel. You can't blame him for sharing his time with someone else if you haven't told him you want him to be spending it with you. Now we are gonna put on our big girl panties and do all the above mentioned things, right?" she said sweetly.

"yes to the first two. No to the last one. I can't do that." I slid off the counter and stomped to the kitchen. I was going to do what I did best, bake myself stupid.

"You're a fool Bella!" Rose called after me. I pulled out the flour effectively ending our conversation.

Alice~

I opened my swollen eyes early the next day. All I saw was the hardwood floor beneath me. My shoulder was stiff. My ribs ached but it wasn't from sleeping on the hardwood floor, it was from the sobs that racked my body after Edwards news. A father. I had a father my entire life and no one told me. How many times had I sat in the Masen's kitchen after school doing home work and raiding their fridge? How many times had I gone to there house to take pictures before a school dance? How could I have not known? Why didn't something inside me scream "Him! He's your dad stupid!!" I always thought my Dad left before I was born. I never hated him for it. I just hoped he was happy and had found a place in the world. I pushed myself up off the floor bringing my knees to my chest. I laid my arms across my knees and sighed. I was a ball of mixed emotions. I didn't hate him but I wanted answers and I needed to get them by myself. Edward would offer to go with me if I told him what I wanted to do but that wouldn't solve anything. This was something I needed to do for myself, alone.

I showered and dressed. I did my hair and make up. I wanted to look flawless when I stood toe to toe with the woman that held all the answers. I didn't know if she would even speak to me but I had to try. I walked out the side door to get in my car. I stopped when I noticed Edward sitting up against my front door sound asleep. He had been there all night. It hit me then that I had a brother. A brother who had a daughter. I smiled gently to myself. I had always been Lilly's god mother, her "Aunt" for all intents and purposes but now I really was her aunt. Deep inside that tiny bit of knowledge eased my heart a little. I put my hand out to wake him than drew it back. I had to do this alone and if I woke him I would never get the chance. I continued down the drive way on foot and walked slowly to the Masen's house.

Standing on the door step my knees shook. I wanted to run. I wanted to go away from this house as fast as my legs would carry me but I couldn't. I wouldn't do that. I wanted to be the ball buster my mother had raised all alone. I wanted to stand here and face her. I wanted the truth. I raised my hand and knocked on the door. It was early. Long before nine in the morning when most of the town would be up and about starting the day. No one answered. I knocked again, this time harder. After what felt like an eternity the door opened. The look on Mrs. Masen's face said it all.

"I know everything." I said looking her straight in the eye. That was a lie. I knew nothing. My letter from him was still unopened on the floor in my foyer.

"I knew this day would come but not so soon." she whispered. Her body shook as she fought back tears.

"May I come in or are we going to do this on the porch for the world to see?" my words shocked me. It wasn't like me to be rude. She moved out of the way and I walked into my fathers house.

"What do you want?" she asked curtly. She wrapped her robe tight around herself and walked into the kitchen. I followed slowly behind her.

"I want the truth. My mother is dead. I can't ask her. Edward Senior is gone. You are the only one left to tell the tale." I crossed my arms over my chest. She didn't offer me a place to sit so I stood in her kitchen and waited.

"What is it you want to know?" she asked me, her teeth clenched her body stiff.

"Is it true? Is Edward Senior my biological father?" "We don't know. Your mother was also sleeping with her husband." she said. Her frail thin fingers held on to the counter to keep herself up right.

"So you're saying no one really knows?" I asked. Her eyes shot up open, she stared at me incredulously.

"Yes. You weren't told because he didn't want you to know. He didn't want you. He made his choice. He chose his true family. Edward and I. Your mother was fling. She was a passing fancy. I was the love of his life. Not her." her words pierced me but I didn't let it show.

"I think you're wrong. I think they meant something to each other and that's what galls you. Not that I was born. Not that I exists, it galls that he loved her but spent his life with you." my words shocked me. I clamped my mouth shut tight.

"What don't you understand? He didn't want you. Dress it up however lets you sleep through the night but he didn't love you. He didn't love your mother. He loved me." she pointed to herself as she shouted. I simply shook my head,

"You've been telling yourself that lie so long you've forgotten what the truth is." I shouted back.

"How dare you!" she screamed.

"How dare I? I grew up in this house! Edward and Bella were my best friends and everyone kept this from me. I've walked around thinking I was alone in the world and then I find out I've got a brother." I wanted to sit down and cry some more but this wasn't the moment. I would say my peace and leave her alone.

"You don't have a brother. I have a son. Edward had a son. You have nothing." her tongue was like venom in my ears.

"He's my brother." I said softly. I knew it was true.

"You have no proof." she said. I smiled softly,

"I don't need any. He knows it and I know it." a look of sudden awareness came across her face,

"Edward knows?" she said quietly. Her hand came up over her mouth to stiffle the sob. "Oh god how does he know? We were so careful!" she shrieked.

"He knows everything. We have copies of the will. We have letters written in Edward Sr. own hand. No court would deny that as proof." I said. Mrs. Masen stared off into space like a deer caught in headlights.

"I have one more question and then I'll leave you alone. I won't ask you for anything, ever." I told her.

"What is it? What more can you possibly want to know?" her voice was a harsh whisper.

"Was Lilly the reason you kept Edward away for so long?" I asked. She shook her head,

"we kept him away because of you. He came to close to finding out so we convinced him to go away. Once he was gone. I told him she moved on." she admitted it. It was true. I was angry with her for so many things but this escpially. I turned and walked away from her.

"No one will believe you. Your mother was trash. You are trash too! No one will ever believe it." she yelled after me. I closed my eyes and walked out her front door for the last time.

A/n-Okay just a little bit more of Liz being herself and then we wash our hands of her. I am so ready to do it lol. Okay you guys show me so much love with your reviews. Thank you! Question, if I had a twitter would anyone subscribe? I would post progress reports for my stories....let me know!


	16. Chapter 16

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.

Edward~

I was awakened with water to the face. Alice's sprinklers came on. I remembered suddenly I was sleeping on her porch. It came back to me in a rush of mental images. Alice crying. Alice running in her house to get away from me. I stood up and stretched. Several of Alice's neighbors were watching me and I am sure they took there morning coffee on the porch to sit and watch what was going on. I knocked on her door again. No answer.

"Come Ali. Open the door. The neighbors are staring and I don't need them getting the wrong idea..." I said to the locked door standing between my sister and I.

"I would open the door Edward but I'm not in there." she said behind me. I turned and there was Alice on the sidewalk. She was dressed almost conservatively in a a black v neck shirt and khakis.

"We have to talk." I told her.

"I know we do. Let's go inside." she said sadly. I moved out of her way and we went inside.

Alice made us some tea. We sat in silence, neither one of us knowing really where to start.

"Ali, I...." My words escaped me. Alice put her hand up to stop me,

"Was he a good Dad?" her voice was barely a whisper.

"He was." I whispered.

"I keep trying to put it all together. I keep trying to move things around in my mind to make him fit into a space but there isn't a space for him. Isn't that weird? He helped give me life but I can't fit him into my life." she said.

"I can't imagine how you feel right. I really can't. I know you must be shocked and hurt and...." It felt odd as a writer to be short on words but they really were escaping me.

"I'm sad and hurt and yet...." her lips drew a tight line over her teeth.

"And yet?" I repeated. She looked up at me for the first time since we came in the house,

"I'm relieved." she smiled. It was a watery smile. Tears rolled down her cheeks. I walked over to her,

"Why relieved?" I asked.

"I'm not alone. I've walked around for so long thinking my mother was all I had. Thinking I was alone. It's one thing to have friends who love you but it's not blood. Oh god Edward, I'm not alone!" she threw her arms around my neck sobbing into my shoulder. I wrapped mine around her body.

"No Ali. You're not alone. Never ever alone again. I'll always be here. I'll always be your family." I held on tighter to her.

"Have you read your letter yet?" I wondered a loud. She shook her head no.

"I can leave if you'd like to do it alone." I told her. She walked out and retrieved it, "I don't want to be alone when I read it. Will you stay with me?" she asked softly. I nodded. She took a seat in the chair across from me and removed the folded piece of paper from the confines of the envelope. She handled it as if it were made of glass.

"My dearest Mary Alice," her voice wavered from the start. She began to cry. She passed the letter to me. I read it to her, "My dearest Mary Alice, If you have received this, I am gone. By now you'll know the truth, I'm your father. I know you're angry and hurt but you have to know something. On the day you were born I snuck into the hospital to look at you through the nursery window. It was the middle of the night and no one knew I was there. A nurse brought me into the nursery and for a moment allowed me to hold you. As I held you in my arms I knew you were going to be something truly special. I loved you so much I was willing to do anything to protect you. That included keeping this secret. I didn't want you to be the daughter born of an affair between a secretary and her married boss. I wanted you to be happy. I knew in a town like ours you would always be treated differently and I couldn't let them do that to you. When Elizabeth presented me with the option to stay in Forks but I could never see you or your mother again I knew it was the only option. At least if I was in town I could watch over you from a far. I didn't know you would end up Edward's best friend. Sometimes life will surprise you pleasantly that way. I just want you to know I loved your mother. I loved her in a way I never loved anyone else. She was my soul mate, my true partner on this earth and from that bond we created you. For that I will never be sorry. I will never apologize for giving the world the light that truly is uniquely yours. Always remember you are loved. Beyond reason, with no agenda you are loved. Don't worry about me because I'll always be with you if want me to be. Just keep me in your heart as I've always kept you in mine.

I love you. Now, forever and always,

Dad." I looked up at her. She smiled while tears ran down her cheeks.

"He loved me." she whispered. Her smile beamed from every inch of her face.

"He did. He loved your mother too." I said handing her back her letter.

"I want to tell Rose, Emmett and Jasper but I think you should tell Bella alone. She has a special right to know I'm related to her kid." Alice told me. From there we hatched the plan. It was our first act as brother and sister.

Bella~

I ran out of flour into my fourth dozen of blue berry muffins. I was about to yell for Rose to make a run to the market but I had an unexpected visitor. Edward. I was covered in ingredients from head to toe. _Why is it you always look like a model and I always manage to look like shit?_ I thought harshly to myself.

"I need to speak to you." he said his voice low and seductive.

"I don't have anything to say to you." I replied sharply.

"I have a lot of things to say to you." he said. He walked further into the kitchen. I noticed the bundle of papers he was carrying along with two envelopes. He stood behind me so close I could smell his scent. I could breath him in. it made my knees weak.

"I loved kissing you the other night." he murmured. I spun on him. He was so close to me if he took a step I would be pinned against the metal prep table.

"Edward if you want to see Lilly just ask me. This is all really unnecessary." I said.

"Excuse me?" he said as if he were confused.

"You don't have to sweet talk me every time you want to see her. Just let me know when you're free and we can work out a schedule but I cant keep doing this. It's to painful." my voice was harsh. I fought to keep from wrapping my arms around myself. Edward tossed the papers on to the flour covered table and laughed darkly,

"Why is it you will believe the darkest lie to cross my lips but never the brightest truth?" he said. His eyes bore into mine. It felt as if he could see straight through me. I stuttered for a reply as he continued,

"I love you. I am helplessly, hopelessly, utterly and totally desperately in love with you. I always have been. You're the one, the only one and if I don't end up with you I will die alone because for me there is no one else, there never has been. Please don't misunderstand me though, I love Lilly too and I refuse to apologize for it. I want us, the three of us to be a family. I want to marry you, I want to have more absolutely beautiful babies with you. You're it for me and when are ready to forget the past and look into our future you know where I'll be." swiftly and softly he kissed my forehead and then walked away out the back door. I was still lost for words. I remembered suddenly the papers he had left. I looked over them quickly and found an envelope addressed to me. I pulled the piece of paper out and read it silently.

"_Dear Bella, I owe you an apology for so many things. First and foremost I must apologize and take the blame for my part in what happened between you and Edward. He wanted to come home the first night was gone. We kept him away for our own selfish reasons that I am sure will be explained to you sooner rather then later if you are reading this. He loves you. He always has. We told him you moved on and you were well without him. It was to much for him to come home and see you with another man so he simply never returned. I hope someday the two of you will find a way to be together. If not for your own sakes then for Lilly's because I can truly say from experience, every child should have a father. I want to thank you for allowing me to be apart of Lilly's life. She is a joy and she was the sunshine of my life the last few years I was on this earth and I am sure she is more than I deserved. I hope the education i've left Lilly will help lighten your burden and ease you mind. _

_Love, _

_Edward Masen Sr. _

"Honey what's wrong?" Rose walked in the kitchen eying me carefully.

"It wasn't his fault. He does love me." I whispered in total shock. I handed Rose the letter with a shaky hand. She read it over. I knew when she hit certain parts because her eyes became as big as saucers.

"I'm the one." I mumbled.

"He said that?" Rose asked me.

"Yes." I responded.

she took my shoulders and shook hard, "Then what the fuck are you doing standing here?" I stared at her blankly. The swirl of information running through my brain was too much. It was like getting hit in the face with a frying pan.

"Bella if I gorgeous, rich, successful man, who also happens to be the father of your child pronounces you're the one. The _one_. You don't stand here and weigh your options, you run. You go as fast as your legs will carry you and you go to him. Tell him you love him too." Rose said with conviction.

"You're right." I said. She was already untieing my apron. "Oh my god Rose, you're right. I have to go!" I shrieked and took off running from the coffee house.

"Thats my girl!" was the last thing I heard Rose scream.

Edward~

I walked down main street, my hands stuffed in my pockets. I could smell the rain coming. I didn't look up to see the gray skies above me but I knew they were there. I tucked my chin down and sulked again. I had poured my heart out to Bella and she said nothing. _Maybe we are to far gone. Maybe we cant go back again._ I thought to myself. I felt the rain begin to hit my stiff sore shoulders.

"Edward! Stop Edward!" I heard a familiar voice call. I looked over my shoulder as the rain came down. Bella was running right to me. I stopped in my tracks in the middle of the street. Bella made it to me finally. I kept my face down. She cradled my face in her hands looking deep into my eyes. I had no choice but to look into hers. Those doe brown eyes had stared into mine so many times but something about now was different.

"Did you mean it?" she asked between pants for air. Her smile was beaming. It looked like the muscles in her face would ache from smiling so hard. The corner of my mouth turned up in a grin.

"Every word." I whispered. Bella's thumbs stroked the apples of my cheeks. She stood up on the tips of her toes, laying her forehead on mine,

"I love you too. I love you and I want to marry you and I want to live in that ridiculous house until it falls down around our ears. I want a future and I want it to be with you." her words were everything I dreamed they would be. She wrapped her arms around my neck. We were both soaking wet and everyone passing us thought we were lunatics.

"Promise me one thing?" she said. I kissed her forehead, her eyes lids, her cheeks. She was so real and so warm and mine.

"I'll give you anything." I told her. She kept smiling as I leaned down to kiss her full gorgeous lips.

"Don't leave again. Never ever again." she said.

" I'll be here forever and ever my love." I told her before I gave her a kiss so passionate we nearly cracked the pavement on main street.

A/n- Thanks for all the reviews first of all. Second of all sorry this took so long and third I really really want to hear all your thoughts on this so please review!


	17. Chapter 17

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.

Edward~

Bella and I went back to her cafe to dry off before she had to go get Lilly from school. We had a lot to talk about but what I was more excited about than anything was the possibility of telling I was her father. Bella's hair was soaking wet. She bent over and dried it with the tiny towel. I wanted to touch her again. I wanted to hold her but she had to know the truth in order for all things to be fair and equal.

"We have to talk." I said softly. She stood up and smiled sadly.

"That sounds ominous." her eyes went from happy to sad in a matter of moments.

"It's not sad. Just complicated. Come sit with me." I pulled out one of the chairs from the small kitchen table she had in the kitchen. She walked to me slowly like she was trying to put off whatever I had to say that might dampen our happy moment in the street.

"God Edward please tell me you don't have a child in New york." her body trembled in her chair. I took the seat across from her and gently held her hands.

"I don't have a child. There was never anyone for me that way but you, love. What I have to tell you is going to be sort of shocking but I'm hoping you'll be happy." I said as softly and reassuringly as I could.

Bella took two deep breaths and let each one out.

"Okay, I'm ready." she looked into my eyes. A smile twitched on my lips. I couldn't help it. I was happy about what I had to tell her.

"I don't have a child but I do have a sister." I squeezed her fingers gently. Bella sucked in a shocked breath,

"What? I mean who is she? What is she like? My daughter has an Aunt?" Bella's reaction made me smile. She was always so full of questions.

"Okay as if that wasn't shocking enough, here's the part that's a doozy." I paused for a moment to sort out my thoughts. It was still sort of a jumble of emotions but it was getting easier every minute I was with her, "Alice is my sister. My half sister." I stared into Bella's wide brown eyes waiting for a reaction. Her brow creased while she processed this enormous piece of information. It was sort of adorable to watch. Bella was normally an open book but to watch her process the news was adorable.

"Alice is Lilly's aunt?" she said. I nodded, a huge grin on my face. Bella's hand flew to her forehead, "Oh my god!! this makes so much sense! They are so alike. I thought it was because they spent so much time together. Alice is Lilly's godmother after all so they see each other a lot. I thought it just rubbed off over time. I didn't think it's a blood thing!" she was rambling. It was so cute. I reached up and stroked her cheek gently. It calmed her. She began to breath normally and smile.

"I wanted to tell you first since you have more of a stake in this than Emmett, Rose or Jasper. We have to talk about some other stuff too." I told her. She stood and placed herself in my lap. I held her gently as she wrapped her arms around my neck.

"The only thing that matters now is us and how we can be a great family for Lilly." she said laying her head in the little spot between my neck and shoulder. I rubbed her back gently and kissed her forehead,

"I want to go to your dad and tell him my intentions. I feel like it's the right thing to do." I said softly. Bella sighed,

"But it wasn't your fault! We were tricked. You don't owe him an explanation." She sat up and looked deep in my eyes as she talked. It was hard to concentrate with her looking at me that way.

"I do owe him an explanation because if a man if ever did this to Lilly I would hunt him down."

"You sound like a dad already. Come on." she stood and tugged me by the hand, "Let's go get clean clothes and you can come be all manly after I feed my Dad dinner." she leaned up on her tip toes pressing her lips to mine in a way that was meant to be chased but it was erotic as hell because she was so close to me and she smelled so good after the rain. I caressed her face then ran my fingers into her rain soaked locks. She deepened the kiss. I groaned a little into her mouth. I fought my hips so they wouldn't move against hers. She took two big steps back placing herself against the wall. I trailed my lips down her face, stopping to nip and kiss over her jaw. Her breathing hitched. My pride got a boost when she moaned my name softly.

"Until tonight my love." I said and stepped away from her. I walked out the front door of the coffee house with a grin on my face and a bounce in my step. Everything finally felt back on track.

Bella~

I waited outside Lilly's school feeling like I would explode with happiness. Above all people I couldn't wait to share it with her. Finally Lilly would have what she deserved, a true family. It was to soon to say whether or not Edward and I would be together forever but I sure had hope. Remembering his lips on my neck or the way his eyes smoldered at me gave me a rush once again. To say it was a nice feeling was an understatement. The bell rang and all the kids came out to waiting parents and cars but my kid was absent from the group. I waited for the crowd to clear and then I saw her standing underneath an overhang with her teacher.

"Ms. Swan we'd like to speak with you please." she called. Silently I cursed her and just knew she was about to burst my happy bubble.

Inside Lilly's classroom sat the principal, a woman I didn't know and hadn't seen before and another teacher I recognized as a second grade teacher. Each of them stopped the current conversation when I entered the room. I looked down at Lilly in jeans and a neon green long sleeved shirt. She looked back up at me with her best, "I didn't do it. Please believe me." face. I kissed her head. Her teacher dismissed her to go play on the other side of the room. Each of the adults stood and introduced themselves to me and shook my hand. I took the tiny seat as it was offered to me.

"What happened?" I asked the group. Lilly's teacher laid her hands in her lap softly and smiled.

"It's not a problem but we thought you should know." she was trying to be gentle. Like she was about to tell me my kid was defective or something. The principal cleared his throat and gave a tight smile,

"Lilly has....well she's sort of has an imaginary friend." I looked among the adults and smiled,

"That's normal isn't it? Most children have one at one point or another." I said. The woman I didn't know had identified herself as a school psychologist. She smiled and addressed me directly, "Of course. Totally normal but most imaginary friends are the child's age. When we asked Lilly about it she said he's much older and well there's something else." they all looked at each other like this was the part where I would lose it.

"What is it?" I asked. Lilly's teacher smiled,

"Lilly docent have an imaginary friend. She has an imaginary father. She said he comes and talks to her at recess and sometimes when she's playing in her yard. We tried to get her to tell us his name but she says his name is Daddy. Ms. Swan, you can see how this is a problem. We are all well aware of Lilly's parental situation and we're concerned that perhaps the situation is effecting her more than we realized." the other adults nodded in agreement with her statement. I pushed myself out of the tiny chair and stood up, "thank you for the heads up. I will be sure and talk to her tonight." I went over and got Lilly gathered up and then carried her to the car.

Lilly rode home in silence. When I pulled in my Dad's cruiser wasn't there. I took Lilly in the house and got her settled in. When her back pack, jacket and rain boots were off I knew it was time to talk.

"Lil, do we have secrets?" I asked her. I pulled her up and sat her on the counter. She shook her head "No" and kept her eyes firmly on her lap.

"Why didn't you tell me you have a new imaginary friend?" I wondered. She wiped her eyes and wouldn't look up. She didn't like for anyone to see her cry. She was very much a Swan that way.

"He said I should keep it a secret. He said he would tell you." she raised her little tear stained face to me. I grabbed a paper towel and wiped her tears.

"Baby he's imaginary he can only talk to you." I kissed her forehead and got her a glass of water. She took it from me gulping down to calm herself.

"Mommy I didn't tell them but he's real. Daddy's real and he says he loves you and he's going to marry you." I knew my daughter had a wile imagination but not this wild. I smiled,

"Let me guess. He's got green eyes and pale skin and he's really tall?" I asked her. She shook her head,

"No Mommy. He's got black hair and it's real long. His skin is super tan like Sue's and sometimes he drives a little tiny yellow car. He said the car used to be really loud but he built it again so it would be quiet when he came to see me at school. He's nice. Sometimes he brings me cookies from the diner. He said he knows you don't let me eat junk but it's okay cause he's my Daddy." she put her arms up signaling me to put her down. My body was numb. She was describing Jake to me. They had seen each other but never had direct contact. No one but an adult would know Jake drove a yellow rabbit, his first car he had rebuilt himself when he wasn't driving his truck. Lilly ran and got on a chair. She opened her book bag and pulled a cellophane wrapped cookie. My heart almost stopped. He had been secretly seeing my kid and I didn't know for how long. Her teacher said he'd come to her at home too. He had been right underneath my nose and I never knew it.

"See! He's real! I saved it to show you." she held up the cookie and smiled like she was holding a prize. I gathered myself as best I could and walked over to her.

"What else did he say to you?" I kneeled in front of her trying to control the panic in my voice and my eyes. Lilly didn't answer me. "Lilly what did he say?" I almost shrieked.

"He said he loves me! He said he's always loved me and you kept us apart!" she cried out in huge pent up sobs. I felt tears prick at the corner of my eyes.

"Baby he's not your father. I know who your father is and it's not him." I could barely talk over the lump in my throat. Lilly cried with her whole body and it broke my heart.

"He said he loves me." she repeated again. I couldn't ever know what it took for seven year old to process the words of an adult.

"Baby did you really think he was your dad? I mean really deep deep deep down inside your heart, did you believe him?" I picked her up. She wrapped her legs around my waist and her arms around my neck. I started pacing the kitchen as I had when she was fussy as a baby.

"No." fresh sobs broke from her body. I felt horrible that her mind was so confused.

"Okay then let's start off fresh by saying we wont ever talk to him again and if he comes to you at school you get a teacher right away or you scream as loud as you can." I rubbed her back in soothing pats. She shook her head that she understood and promptly fell asleep on my shoulder. I got the cordless phone and called my Dad home from work.

Edward~

I felt like a horny seventeen year old counting the minutes until I saw Bella again. Before I was due back at Alice's for dinner with Rose, Em and Jasper, I ran to Port Angles and picked up a gift for Lilly. I searched the one toy store there until I found the perfect soft tan colored bear wearing jeans and a little shirt to replace the one Bella and I had cut open to get the key. She didn't know anything was wrong with Pinky but I felt bad just the same.

Rose and the gang definitely knew something was up when Alice attempted to cook for everyone. Her pasta with meat sauce had turned into a hard slightly black gooey mess. Everyone was sort of picking it over as we waited for the right moment to tell them. I took one for the team and pronounced myself full then pushed my plate away. After I did everyone seemed to sigh with relief and did the same.

"We have something to tell you and you might be sorta shocked but we hope you'll be happy for us." Alice said in her sing song voice. Emmett sucked in breath,

"Oh my god! You two are together?" he said in a shocked way. Before I could correct him Rose chimed in,

"They better not be the way he was sucking face with Bella this afternoon!" she said.

"Oh my god you sucked face with Bella and you didn't tell me? What kind of a brother are you?" Alice said without thinking and slapped my shoulder. The entire group went still and became very very quiet.

"Brother? Are you joking?" Jasper asked. I shook my head,

"No it's true. Along time ago Alice's mom and my Dad hooked up. She's my half sister." I told them. Emmett's mouth gaped. Rose simply blinked her eyes at us like we had lost it. Jasper as always was stoic and expressionless.

"Ali, maybe you better explain it. I seem to have lost them." I said to her and that's exactly when she did.

When the dust settled and most of the questions were answered it was a relief to know they were happy for us. Shocked and more than a little curious but happy. Almost right away everything went back to the way it always was. Em had a space he wanted to show Jasper and I tomorrow for shop head quarters. Rose and Alice talked fashion and there plans for the weekend I got Rose to agree to come with me and see Carlisle when Alice, Bella and I went down to sign the documents for our inheritance and his estate.

Now I was walking to Bella's house from around the corner I heard the voice of Chief Swan bellowing into the October night. I also heard Bella begging him to keep his voice down. I sped up my pace feeling deep in my bones that something was wrong. I took the walk way at a run and knocked hard on the front door. Chief Swan flung it open and looked at me.

"What the hell do you want?" he said gruffly. Bella appreared instantly,

"Don't be rude." she commanded him and took my hand leading me into the house.

"Is this a bad time?" I asked. Bella groaned,

"No. we just have a situation and my Dad thinks going in guns blazing is the way to handle it."

"Talk to her!" he commanded. Bella cocked her head to the side , her arms crossed over her chest.

"Daddy stop it!" she yelled. I looked between the two of them still holding the little bear in my hand.

"Make her see reason! Make her understand this is not a game!" he yelled.

"What the hell is going on?" I demanded to know.

"When I went to pick Lilly up today her teacher informed me Lilly's made an imaginary friend." Bella said. Her voice was exhausted and I could tell she had repeated it many times.

"Except he's not imaginary! He's real and he's a grown ass man. That guy could of taken Lilly anywhere Bella!" the chief shrieked.

"Who is it?" I asked them.

"It's Jake. He had Lilly convinced he is her father and she wanted one so desperately she believed him. This is all my fault. If I just would of called you in New York and not believed all those stupid lies then this would of never happened. He would of never gotten near my baby." she wiped her eyes. I wrapped my arms around her tight and fought the waves of anger racking my body.

"She wont let me go over to La push and kick his ass." Charlie said clearly frustrated.

"Can she file a report or put the school on alert?" I said through gritted teeth.

"Yeah. It's done. Mike came over not an hour ago and took care of it." he told me.

"Bella, baby, I need to talk to your Dad. Where's Lilly?" I smiled as I said her name hoping Bella would smile too.

"She's asleep in my bed." Bella's eyes were tired and her skin was paler then usual. I kissed her forehead ever so softly,

"Sit down for a few minutes. Just breath. I'll be right back." I kissed the tip of her nose. I could feel Charlies confusion. It was understandable.

Charlie and I went out on the porch. I stood in front of the porch swing. He paced in front of me like a caged animal.

"I love your daughter. I always have." I figured to get right to the point and be direct was best.

"That's why you left her pregnant and alone at eighteen?" his words hurt but I deserved them.

"I intend to spend the rest of my life making it up to her sir. If she'll have me."

"What makes you think after everything that's happened your Mama is gonna be okay with this?" he asked me.

"Bella told you?" I wondered. He gave a curt jerk of his chin.

"If she doesn't like it that's her loss. Honestly at this point I don't want her in my life or theirs." I stepped forward a little and stood in front of him. Not the gangly kid I was seven years ago. I was all grown up now and ready to handle my life on my terms.

"She almost died you know." he said solemnly, "Bella....she....when you left it was awful. She wouldn't eat. She would cry herself sick and then when she was all cried out she would sleep for a day at a time. She knew she was pregnant but nothing could make her snap out of it." he sighed and jerked his head towards the house, "the pictures on the mantle in there. She's not in one of em because she was so skinny and sickly after Lilly was born. She couldn't even nurse her because her vitamin levels were so bad. Alice stepped in and made Bella do what she could for the pregnancy but you know Bella. She's...."

"Stubborn." I interjected. He laughed,

"I don't even think that's the word for it but yeah, stubborn."

"I wont ever leave her again. I'd marry her tomorrow if I could." I told him. He smiled warmly,

"What's stopping you?"

I thought over his words carefully.

"Sir may I have your daughters hand in marriage?" I asked him. I couldn't hold back the smile on my face.

"Yeah son. I think that could be arranged." He extended his hand to me and I took it, shaking it firmly.

When we came back inside the house Charlie went to bed while I talked to Bella. She decided to pull Lilly out of school for the rest of the week. Charlie was going to have a couple of his guys patrol the school during recess times to see if he could catch Jake in the act. I kicked off my shoes and laid back on the couch bringing Bella with me. She snuggled in next to me seeming to take great comfort in being in my arms.

"Cute bear." she commented and picked it up off the coffee table. I smiled,

"I got it for Lilly. I miss her." I fought back a yawn and squeezed Bella tighter.

"She'll love it. Edward, I think we should tell her. She deserves the truth." Bella said into my chest. Her tiny fingers played with a button while I stroked her hair.

"Tomorrow we'll take her away to the zoo or something and we'll tell her. I don't want to do it here with everyone being so upset." Bella nodded in agreement. She needed to sleep and I didn't want to be apart from her so I pulled the blanket off the back of the couch and tossed it over us. It was the best sleep i'd had in seven years.

A/n- Hi guys. Thanks for being patient. The reviews for last chapter were totally, insanely awesome! I love reading them. Also don't forget I'm on twitter now (fanfictrips) ill be posting story progression updates there. Okay so please please please please I am begging you guys to help me get to a thousand reviews before the end of this story. If that happened i'd be on cloud nine. Let's make it happen!!


	18. Chapter 18

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.

Edward~

Charlie woke Bella up as he was leaving for work. She rolled away from me, trying not to wake me, I had to resist the urge to pull her back to me. They spoke in whispered tones in the kitchen. The smell of Bella's wonderful cooking filled the air.

"I'm going to call the Kitsop county sheriff to see if I can borrow one of his boys today." Charlie spoke matter-of-factly. His tone clearly indicated to Bella there was no talking him out of it.

"What for Dad?" she wondered. I heard the slide of a ceramic plate over the wooden table surface.

"I'm gonna put him in plain clothes outside Lilly's school. Right where that son of a bitch has been going to her." his fork clinked against the plate as he took a bite. Growing up I had been privy to so many meals in Bella's house, now as an adult I could see Charlies every gesture in my mind.

"I'm going to pull Lilly out for the rest of the week. I was also planning on going over to the school this morning and talking to them. Get Lilly's missed work and stuff."Bella said in a small voice. I knew how guilty she must feel for exposing Lilly to Jake. I hoped deep inside she knew this wasn't her fault.

"Would you like me to go with you?" Charlie asked her.

"I was going to take Edward. I need to have him added to Lilly's pick up list and emergency contact information. I'll leave Lilly with Alice and I will have Rose open the store for me." she paused briefly then sighed,

"it feels strange to go to these measures against Jake. I've known him my whole life. We knew the same people. We were in the same classes and now to think he would hurt my daughter. It's all so odd." a chair squeaked against the linoleum floor. There voices lowered even further,

"Bella. Baby. You would tell me if he hurt you, right? Even if it was sexual" charlie nearly choked on the word. I imagined Bella's face going scarlet from her neck to her hair, "you would tell me?" charlie questioned.

"Of course I would. I wouldn't of stayed with him for two years if I thought he was capable of anything that bad. I just never dreamed." her voice trailed off. I shuddered against the couch when my mind ran through the awful scenarios. The pitter patter of Lilly's feet rang out above us. The chair moved back in the kitchen and water started running. I sat up and tried to run my hand through my impossible hair. Lilly stopped on the landing at the bottom of the stairs. Her face lit up when she saw me.

"Edward!" she cried and ran to me. I opened my arms for her. She snuggled into me, almost sighing with comfort.

"How did you sleep?" I asked her.

"Mommy wasn't in bed when I woke up and I got scared." her tone was little. I wasn't sure if it was from waking up alone or the emotional upheaval from the day before.

"You don't have to be scared. She's in the kitchen with your grandpa." I reassured her. She sat up with tears brimming in her little green eyes.

"I had a bad dream." she confided. She looked almost ashamed to admit. I stroked her back. The feeling of comforting her was so natural.

"You can tell me if you want too." I kissed her forehead and smiled. I didn't know if it was to reassure her or me.

"I had a dream Jake got my mommy. He took her away and I never saw her again." Lilly said. I heard Bella and Charlies footsteps move towards the living room. They stopped short, still leaving Lilly and I alone. I tried to stop my body from shaking with anger and my own fear that Jake would do something to harm Bella and Lilly.

"I won't let him hurt you or Mommy. I'll be right here, I promise." I held her to me tightly again. I had the oddest sensation just to never let her go. To just keep her with me. So nothing or no one could ever hurt her again. It wasn't fees-able but the option was tempting.

"Edward, Jake said he was my Daddy. Did you know that?" Lilly's body shivered. I tossed the blanket over her to keep her warm. She laid her head over my heart and wrapped one arm around my neck.

"I heard that but it's not true honey." I said. She nodded in understanding.

"I wish my Daddy was you." she said in a tiny sleepy voice before she drifted off against my chest.

Bella's eyes met mine. Both of us had tears running down our cheeks. As soon as possible Bella and I would tell Lilly the truth.

Charlie volunteered to stay home later than usual and get Lilly ready for her day. She was sleeping so soundly I didn't want to move her but I hadn't truly been home, well to my mothers, in almost two days. She hadn't called me, nor had I called her. It was almost nine in the morning when I walked up the drive way. A strange car was in the drive way, a Cadillac. Leaning against the front door was a real estate for sale sign. The pieces of the puzzle fell together suddenly. She was going to sell her house and move away. She was running. "Like hell she is." I muttered to myself, clenching and unclenching my fists. I walked up the yard and into the house slamming the front door behind me. I turned and saw my mother and a paunchy middle aged man sitting in the formal dining room.

"Edward! I didn't expect you home." she said. Her voice was bright but with an edge to it. It was the sort of voice a mother might use to keep a petulant youngster in line in front of company. I wasn't having it.

"You're selling the house. You are going to fucking run away?" I asked through clenched teeth. She smiled politely at our company. He took his cue and cleaned up his papers.

"I'll have the listing in next week at the latest. It's a beautiful home. Selling wont be a problem." he advised her and then stood up to leave.

"I can't believe you." I spat at her. She flinched like I had hit her. The agent left and shut the door behind him but he didn't leave before he jammed the wooden for sale sign in the yard.

"Edward try and understand." she commanded. I shook my head, my lips set in a stiff line.

"Understand what? You lied to me. You kept things from me and now my life is finally back in order. Does it hurt you to watch me be happy mother? Is that why you are going to turn tail and run?" I folded my arms across my chest. A thought flickered through my mind, why did I care if she left? She didn't want Lilly or Bella. She certainly wouldn't want me to marry her. She surely didn't want me to stay here so why did I care?

"All I've ever wanted is for you to be happy. You were my reason for everything I did. All the lies, the deceit I did it all for you. It's what any good mother would of done." she stood at the end of table. Her face looked worn beyond her years. She was thinner then when I had arrived which seemed to be an age ago but really wasn't little more than a month.

"A good mother would of taken the time to tell her child the truth. No one should have had to find out the things I did the way I did. Not to mention what you did to Lilly and Bella. Oh and Alice. Tell me mother, did my _sister_ factor into your decisions at all? Did you ever consider it was her life you were playing with too?" Mother's face flinched and her lips curled into a disgusted snarl,

"That woman isn't your sister." she spat. I laughed darkly,

"Just like Lilly's not my daughter and Bella doesn't love me anymore?" I walked to the end of the table and braced my palms against it's cool wooden surface.

"I'm not going to beg you to stay mother. I'm not going to get on my knees and beg for you to be apart of my life or your grand daughters for that matter but you should know that when you leave my life wont stop. I am going to keep going. I'm going to marry Bella and hopefully have more absolutely perfect children with her. I'm going to live here and love Bella with every ounce of my soul. I'm going to be a damn good brother to Alice and a really great dad to Lilly. If you cant handle that then you can't handle me." I looked her dead in the eyes as I spoke. Her bottom lip quivered,

"You would choose them over me." it was a statement, an understanding of her current situation.

"They never asked me to choose." I said and walked up the stairs to shower, change and pack up my things. I had a day to attend to and it no longer included her.

Bella~

Rose had no problem opening for me once I explained the situation and my Dad was being more than sweet about staying with Lilly until Edward and I ran our errands. The plan was for Rose to go and open. She would stay open until about twelve and then close down for the day. I felt like I was lighter than air every time Edward, and what we were about to do, crossed my mind. It felt so good to be able to tell Lilly the truth, to finally give her the father she so desperately wanted. I had just gotten out of the shower and was still wrapped in a towel when my phone rang. I sprinted to answer it. Hoping it was the velvet voice I was missing. To my surprise, it was Rose.

"Rose, what's wrong?" I asked immediately. Her voice was coming in short pants,

"I think I broke the cappuccino maker. You have to come down here now. Like right now Bella." she was freaking out but I didn't understand why.

"Rose it's okay, we just wont have cappuccino today. The world will not end." I said sarcastically.

"Bella please come down here." she asked once more.

"I'll be down as soon as possible. Don't leave okay?" I said. Rose laughed nervously,

"Wont be a problem. Bell's, I love you and I'm so sorry." her voice cracked. She was crying. Rose hardly ever cried.

"I love you too. I'm not mad at you. Don't cry." I told her. She hung up her end before I could say anything else. I dressed quickly, not even bothering to dry my hair. Before I left I told my Dad I would be right back. I kissed him and Lilly good bye. Lilly's eyes were sad.

"Mommy, don't go." she begged. She had not done this since she was a baby but the guilt hit me exactly the same. I crouched down to her level and smiled,

"I'll be right back." I kissed the end of her nose and smiled.

"You promise?" she asked me, her big green eyes staring at me.

"I'll always come back. I promise baby." I kissed her cheek and went out the side door to my jeep. The drive to the coffee house had never felt so long.

When I pulled up in the parking lot the thing that hit me immediately was there were no cars in the spaces. None. No customers, not rose's convertible or Alice's beetle. Something was wrong. The back door was open. I could see tiny flickers of movement in the kitchen. I got out and tucked my keys in the back pocket of my jeans. My heart started to beat faster as I approached the door. I had never been scared to walk inside before but for some reason now, with every step I took closer, I was terrified. Reason told me to turn around and leave. It said something was a miss and I shouldn't be here but I knew Rose was in there and I couldn't leave her. An eery silence filled the space around me when I walked through the back door. I could see Rose in front of me. Long blonde hair running down her back. She shook from the force of her sobs. She turned to me, I noticed first her eye was black, I noticed second her nose was bleeding.

"Oh my god Rose, what happened to you?" I asked her. Her face crumpled and I felt something cold and metal rub against the exposed skin on the back of my neck. I gulped when I heard the gun cock behind me.

"Do as I say Bella and no one has to get hurt." Jake said to me. I raised my hands slowly to show I had no weapon.

"Good girl Bella. This should be very easy." he said in a cold detached voice. The last thing I remember is the butt of the gun making a smacking sound into the back of my head. After that everything was dark.

A/n- Okay first of all thanks for being patient. Second thing is thank you for all the reviews. I know this chapter is short but it's helping me write in the long run. I have a new story up, Curve ball. Take a look at it and remember I am now on twitter as Fanfictrips.


	19. Chapter 19

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.

Bella~

Everything hurt when I came too. It was like coming awake after surgery, everything was groggy and I wasn't clear on the details of what happened. My eyes opened slowly and I was aware I was in the coffee house. That's when it all came flooding back . I was being held hostage. Jake had a gun. I looked over to my left and winced from the pain radiating at the back of my head. Her head sagged, she was unconscious. Jake sat on the opposite wall in front of me. His arms slung on his knees, still holding the gun. His head snapped up and he smiled.

"You're awake." he sounded relieved. For a moment I wondered if he thought he hit me so hard he threw me into a coma.

"Jake why are you doing this?" I couldn't help but wonder what kind a sick tormented thought process drove a man to kidnapping his ex girlfriend and her best friend.

"So you'll see reason. We were meant to be together Bella. It was always supposed to be you and me." he said with conviction. He truly did believe what he was saying.

"Why did you have to involve Rose?" I straightened up as best I could with my hands tied.

"Rose wasn't part of my plan. I'm sorry she'll get hurt in this. Emmett's a nice guy. It's sad he'll lose his wife this way." he stopped for a moment and shrugged, "but that's what you get for associating with the wrong types of people. Edward really isn't good for anyone. Especially you." his voice was sincere. It made my stomach ache. He was so delusional.

"Jake you can let Rose go." I told him. My own life meant little right now. I had to make sure Rose would live. This wasn't her fault, she shouldn't have to pay with her life.

"I can't. She'll tell on us and I can't have that." he said.

"At the very least. You don't have to kill her. I'll give you whatever you want. Please don't kill Rose." I all but begged. If he wanted me to beg I would. I would do anything.

"I don't have any way to insure she wont rat us out until we're over the border." his words hit me over the head. He wasn't going to kill me, he was kidnapping me. I mentally calculated how much time I had before he took me away. I prayed silently to whatever god would listen. Please let someone come looking for me. Please let my Dad figure out something is wrong. Please please please. Pain filled my chest. I was right on the edge of having everything I ever wanted and now it was being taken away from me. Edward and I would never tell Lilly he was her father. My baby would grow up with no mother like I had. I would never see Edward's beautiful face again. Never kiss him again. Never make love to him again. It was all slipping away at the hands of the mad man who made me his prisoner. Rage flowed through my veins then, thick and hot. I wouldn't let it end this way. I wouldn't lose it all. Not until I had tried absolutely everything.

"Jake let's make a deal." I offered, my last ditch effort to save my life. Jake shook his head,

"In case you haven't noticed, I'm the one with the gun. I'm in charge." he informed me. I smiled,

"So you are but what if I could make this easier for you." I looked at him through my lashes. I knew without a doubt that always turned him on. It seemed like now was no exception.

"How could you do that?" he wondered. He was so stupid, he was falling for this. Suddenly I remembered the panic button my Dad installed under the front counter. It rang right into the police station. There was a secondary switch that was wireless underneath the metal prep table. He didn't know about them. He couldn't.

"I'll go willingly if you untie me and you don't hurt Rose. I'll leave town with you tonight. We can go right now if you don't hurt Rose." I told him and struggled to my feet. He stood up too and walked to me.

"You want to go with me don't you, baby?" he cooed. I smiled brightly.

"Now that I realize how much you truly do love me. I can't stay away from you any longer. Oh Jake, I love you." it was the biggest lie I had ever told and I was a terrible liar but he was buying it. He walked to me in a huge stride and swept me into his arms, dropping the gun on the floor.

"Oh Jake make love to me. Please." I begged. He stepped away from me and grinned,

"Bella here? With Rose right there? We couldn't." he smiled. I felt sick but hid it from him well. My eyes turned to the prep table to the side of us. I let a slow lazy grin form on my lips.

"Well at least let me show you how much you mean to me. Untie me, baby. I want to touch you." he did it before the words even exited my mouth totally. I rubbed my hands all over his chest and stomach, sucking in little breaths the way I would if I was truly into this. I maintained eye contact with him. I walked us over to the prep table, hopping up on it I opened my legs for him to get between. I felt sick and disgusted but I had to remember why I was doing this. If I could just get to the button then the police would be alerted and someone would come for me. I could save Rose at the very least. Jake got between my legs, running his hands all over my back and sides. I arched into him so I could get closer to the edge of the table. He kissed me hard and fast. I kissed back trying to make it good for him, believable at least. From the corner of my eye I saw Rose coming too. She would be shocked but hopefully catch on. My hands glided down his back to his ass. I slipped my hands in his back pockets and pulled myself forward. The button was right underneath my leg. I pressed both of my legs underneath the prep table. To Jake it probably felt as if I was grinding my hips into him. He growled with satisfaction. I used every muscle I had to make the little button click in. I felt it when it did. I sighed in relief. I stopped kissing Jake. I clutched my chest as if to catch my breath. I didn't want him to feel my heart pounding and grow suspicious.

"Bella what the fuck..." Rose exclaimed from her groggy position on the floor. I caressed Jake's face and hair never taking my eyes off him. Rose was smart, she would see the gun between us. I had to believe that. The red and blue flashing lights came through the big front windows like my own personal beacon. Jake's eyes changed, they snapped open. He was suddenly aware of what I had done.

"You fuckin bitch!" he screamed. His hands were on my throat before I had a chance to get away. He held me in place there with the lightest of pressure. Not enough to kill me but enough to hold me in my place.

"Rose, you go for that gun and I swear I'll blow your brains out." he exclaimed, "Bella, I am bending over to get the gun. If you move an inch, I will put a bullet in your head then I'll go and find Lilly. Do you want that?" he asked. My entire body went numb, "No." I said firmly. He bent over picking up the gun. He motioned for Rose to move on to the prep table next to me. She did as directed scooting closely into my side. I found her hand and held it tight. Jake stepped back, releasing my throat only to suddenly back hand me across the face. I gasped and held the spot with my free hand.

"You are nothing but a whore and I was going to let you live but now I'm going to kill you both." the dead look in his eyes told me that he meant it. He raised the gun and cocked it. I squeezed my eyes shut tight and prayed.

Edward~

I was driving back to Bella's with my trunk full of clothes when an odd feeling hit me, something was wrong. All the hairs on my arms and neck stood up. I drove faster then I should of and parked in front of Bella's house. Lilly opened the front door and ran to me.

"Somethings wrong!" she exclaimed. I opened my mouth to say something but Lilly kept talking instead, "Mommy left and she promised she would come back but she hasn't and I feel sick. Something bad is happening to my mommy. I just know it. Please help me find my mommy." her tiny eyes were filled with panicky tears. "It's okay love, just relax. Where's grandpa?" I asked her. She pointed to the house. I picked her up on my hip and went up the steps, letting myself in the house. Charlie was on the phone screaming.

"I want every cruiser, every officer in that parking lot in less then five minutes. You call anyone you can think of and get there!" he tossed the phone on to the counter as I heard the crunch of dry wall beneath his fist.

"Lilly go upstairs. I'll come for you in a minute." I told her calmly placing her on the floor.

"But Edward.." she argued. I simply pointed to the stairs and she went. The look of panic on my face told her this was no joking matter. I ran into the kitchen. Charlie was slumped in front of the sink, head in his hands.

"What's wrong?" I asked him in a daze.

"Oh god it's Bella. There's been an accident, hasn't there?" I asked him. He shook his head no.

"Jake's got Bella trapped inside the store. He's holding her and Rose at gun point." he said. I fell to my knees. All the air left my body, I wasn't sure even if I could breath that there would be enough air on the planet to fill my lungs.

"He's got Bella. Oh my god." I covered my mouth with my hands to cover the scream I could feel building. Charlie walked to me and placed a firm hand on my shoulders.

"You've got to keep it together son, we can't go to pieces yet. We have Lilly to think of." Lilly. Our daughter was upstairs scared out of her mind. I had to think of her. I had to do what Bella would do. Charlie went to go get Lilly. We would have to take her with us. I stood tall and took a deep breath. Nothing would happen to her, I vowed. Nothing could happen to her. If there was a god he wouldn't be so cruel as to let Bella walk into my life and then take her way so soon. I was sure of it but it didn't stop the panic. The grim fear rising like bile in my throat washed over me for a moment before Charlie ushered me into the cruiser and he backed down the drive way.

Before I knew it we were at the coffee house. Lilly cried softly in the back seat. I climbed out and took her in my arms. She wrapped her tiny arms around my neck and sobbed softly. I rubbed her back in soothing pats. I closed my eyes, letting a few tears of my own escape. When I opened my eyes again, I saw Alice. She was red faced and still in her pajamas. It was clear she had been awakened with the news. She ran to us flinging her arms around me. I kissed her head and leaned against her.

"He's got them in the kitchen. They said something about a hostage negotiator coming in but no one can find one that isn't hours away." she told me. I heard the screech of tires and the slamming of doors. I looked up and saw Emmett and Jasper running to the police barricade. I quickly passed Lilly to Alice. Emmett was attempting to push his way passed the officers, Jasper wasn't helping the situation.

"Let me through God damn it! That's my wife in there." he cried.

"Em, you gotta let us do our jobs. I know how this feels but you have to..." Mike said to him in his official police officer voice.

"You don't have any fucking clue how this feels! That's my wife. That's Jasper's sister in there!" he roared. Fury was coming off both of them in waves. I noticed the locals gathering slowly to see what was going on. I placed a hand on Emmett's shoulder right as he lost it and broke down in tears. He turned away from Mike and leaned on me. I hugged his huge body to me, not caring how undignified this looked.

"Em, Lilly's over there with Alice. We have to keep it together for her. It's what Bella and Rose would want." I said to him softly. He stood up and took several deep breaths before walking back to Lilly and Alice. Jasper and I stood side by side neither one of us knowing what to say, if there was anything to say at all.

"She called me last night." Jasper blurted out still staring straight ahead.

"Rose?" I assumed. He nodded lowering his eyes to the ground.

"I didn't call her back. She wanted to have dinner and I didn't even bother to call her back. If something happens to her I'll have to live with that forever." I knew how he felt. There was a lot I never got to make up for. If fate didn't favor us, I'd never get to try.

"This will be alright. It has to be alright. There is no other option but for it to be alright." I said trying to sound confident. Jasper didn't say a word, he just walked back to Lilly and Alice. I looked into the store and there was no movement. No signs of life. Charlie was finished being briefed and appeared at my side.

"How bad is it?" I asked him quietly. His face contorted into a mask of total grief.

"He's had them for two hours already. The more hours he has them the worse the out come. Edward, I lost Renee and I can't lose Bella too. I wont survive it." he admitted. I knew how he felt.

"I sent a car for Billy. He's going to try and talk some sense into Jake." he informed me. I stood numb beside him. I had never felt so helpless.

A/n- Short chapter I know but I had to make it short. The next chapter will hopefully be longer. Thank you for all the reviews and kind words. Remember the more reviews I get the faster I write so review!


	20. Chapter 20

Edward~

Billy had been at it for over an hour. He talked to continuously trying to make Jake come from the kitchen. The officers were sure if they could get him in front of the window without Rose or Bella then they would have one of two options, take him down with as much force as necessary or one of the officers would have a clean shot. They wouldn't shoot to kill but he would be down long enough for them to extract the girls. It was going on hour four of the stand off. Everyone was getting more and more on edge if that was even possible. My friends had taken to passing Lilly around for comfort. She was some small portion of Bella we could hold right now. Lilly didn't understand why Bella couldn't come outside or why she couldn't go in to her. She was starting to get extremely irate with all the adults in her life. Charlie was another story entirely. He paced back and fourth behind the barricades. He hadn't said anything to anyone since he told me he couldn't lose Bella. The pain in his eyes at the thought of losing her was a sight I would carry with me for the rest of my life. Sue Clearwater came with Billy. She tried to talk to Charlie but he wasn't budging from his speechless state. Most of the town gathered to watch the spectacle. Ambulances were at the ready and full staffed. The thought of needing them shook me to my core. I repeated to myself over and over again that Bella and Rose had to come out unharmed, there was no other option. I really did think that if I believed it hard enough it would happen. I wasn't naturally an optimistic person but today I had to believe in the power of positive thinking.

"Son, now I know you love Bella but this isn't the way. You come on out now." Billy's voice was true and strong. The way an adult might of spoken to an ambivalent child. One of the officers came into the circle and whispered something to him. Billy's face dropped but he nodded. the look in his eyes scared the hell out of me all over again. I stopped the officer when he came back over to our side,

"What did you say to him?" I wondered. The officer looked away and walked quickly back to the line of cruisers. I approached Charlie and demanded to be told what they said to Billy. Charlies head snapped up.

"The negotiator we've been on the phone with doesn't seem to think this is going anywhere. Best case scenario was for Billy to talk him down and for Jake to release both girls." Charlies voice was detached. He could be a cop right now and not a father but I didn't have that option. I had no other position in this but to be the man in love with Bella.

"And the worst case scenario?" I asked. I knew what the answer was.

"Worst case is for him to release just Rose. He didn't want her anyway from what we can gather." Charlies voice was a whisper as he spoke.

"There has to be a third option." I had to believe that.

"If there is, I don't see one. We've got ten minutes to come up with something or Billy is going to start persuading him to release just Rose." Charlie turned away from me.

"Tell him to take me instead." I demanded.

"What?" Charlie said.

"Tell him to take me instead. He's insane and it might be enough for him to know if he cant have her I won't either." everyone was staring at me like I was crazy and maybe I was but if it would save Bella's life then it was worth it. Charlie took me by the elbow pulling far from the crowd.

"Edward, that's suicide." he said. I shook my head,

"I don't care. Her life for mine. It's a fair trade." I rambled but never gave my words another thought.

"Edward, he could kill you." Charlie said. My eyes stayed fixed on him. He said it as if my life without Bella could mean anything.

"Lilly needs her mother." I said to him. I placed my hand on his shoulder and stared into his eyes, "My daughter needs her mother, Charlie." I was pleading with him to go with this. I didn't want to talk about this anymore. I just wanted to do it.

"You would really die for her." Charlie said. It wasn't a question for him or myself. It was a statement of fact.

"Yes I would. Start the negotiations and I'll need somewhere I can talk to Lilly. I have to tell her something before I go." I said. It was the first time my voice shook since I made the decision to offer the trade. Charlie started making the arrangements, all I could do was wait.

Bella~

Jake started to pace. The gun in his hand still cocked and loaded. Rose prayed quietly beside me. This was not something I had ever known her to do. We listened while Billy tried to talk to Jake about good times and bad times. It wasn't until he mentioned Sarah, Jake's mother, that Jake started pacing. He held his free hand over his ear and kept his head down. He was crying but not backing down. I couldn't tell if Billy was making it better or worse.

"Rose, it's going to be okay." I whispered again and kissed her temple. I don't know how but I still had hope. I knew Edward and my Dad were out there and as long as that was true everything would be okay.

" I keep thinking about all the things I'll never do." she broke down in sobs again. I brushed her tears away and shook my head,

"Wrong. You'll do anything you've ever wanted to do because you are walking out of here. I promise Rose. You're going to walk out of here." I smiled at her to give her some kind of hope. She laid her head on my shoulder and cried. I couldn't cry yet. Crying was like admitting this was over and I couldn't. I had to much left to do for my life to end this way.

"Jacob, this is chief Swan. Answer the phone when it rings." my dad's voice rang over the mega phone. Jake pointed the gun at Rose and I,

"You two don't say a fuckin word. You hear me? Not a fuckin peep." Jake said. A moment later the phone rang. Jake answered it with a snarl. He put it on speaker and kept pacing.

"Jacob, this is Edward Masen." my heart sang at the sound of his voice. I was right. He was out there waiting for me.

"Jake, I know when I came back here it messed up all your plans and I'm sorry about that. I really am but Bella and Rose they didn't do anything. This is all my fault, let me make it right. Take me instead." Edward's statement was like a ton of bricks over my head. I gasped. Jake's eyes met mine.

"Why should I take you? What's in it for me?" Jake wondered. Rose was staring at me.

"When I'm out of the way. Bella might love you again and if she doesn't then you didn't lose her to me because I'll be dead." I wanted to vomit. I felt my stomach roll over and the nausea hit me all at once.

"I'll think about it." Jake told him. I could already see the wheels turning in his mind.

"Charlie says to tell you you've only got ten minutes to make the decision." Jake clicked the phone off. Edward's voice was gone.

"Jake you don't want him. You want me. I did this not him. He didn't make me break up with you. I did it on my own. You should kill me not him." I rambled. A rueful, greedy smile crossed Jake's lips.

Edward~

Charlie briefed me and got me ready for what I had to do but before I went I had to talk to Lilly. Alice brought her to me in the empty store next to Bella's. Charlie cleared it out for me so Lilly and I could talk in private. Alice sat her down then walked to the door, she was giving us as much privacy as she could.

"Lilly do you remember what you said this morning?" I asked her with as big of a smile as I could manage. I kneeled in front of her taking her tiny hand in mine.

"I wished you were my Daddy." she said. It struck me again how small she was.

"that's right. Lilly I'm sorry I haven't been around and I'm sorry it took me so long to meet you but I am your daddy. Your honest to goodness blood father." I told her. It felt good to say the words. I watched the news wash over her. Her eyes lit up, "I knew it! I knew the very first time I saw you!" Lilly yelled. I opened my arms for her and looked up at Alice. She was crying but smiling.

"I have to go help your mommy now. I just wanted you to know I love you with all my heart and I love your mommy too." I hugged Lilly to me tightly and squeezed her. Trying to memorize the feeling of her in my arms.

"I love you too Daddy. Forever and ever." she said into my neck. Charlie knocked on the glass motioning for me to come out. Jake had made a decision.

I carried Lilly until the point where I couldn't anymore. I looked down at Alice, my tiny sister. She laid her head against my chest and sobbed.

"I'm sorry it took me so long to be your brother but Ali, I love you. Please always remember that." I said to her. She nodded. Jasper came over and held her gently to him. I knew they were just friends but maybe someday they would be more. The thought cheered me up a bit. Emmett was waiting for me at the opening in the barricade.

"Edward, I can't tell you what...." the big guy choked up. I smiled,

"It's okay buddy. Just take care of my girls, okay? If something happens. Promise me you'll take are of them." I said. Emmett nodded, "I promise." I slapped Em's arm and walked to Charlie so he could escort me over.

"Remember Edward, he's going to send the girls out as you go in but you cannot have contact with Bella in anyway." I nodded understanding. He could still shoot her and I couldn't take that chance. I looked back over my shoulder just once and saw my family gathered on the side walk. Emmett, Jasper, Alice and Lilly would be joined by Bella and Rose in a moment and things would be right again. Everything would be as it should be.

I walked into the large opening where Billy had been and waited for him to open the door.

It only took a moment before he appeared in the window with both of the girls. Rose was bleeding and crying but other wise she looked okay. Bella didn't appear to be physically injured. Her face crumpled when she saw me through the glass. I smiled. I wished in that second that I had to ability to speak into her mind. I wanted to tell her it's okay. I chose this. I want to do this for you. My thoughts were ripped apart by the sound of a familiar piercing scream. I turned briefly and witnessed my mother trying to break through the barricade.

"No Edward! Oh god no!" she cried. For a moment I felt a pang of guilt. If Jake killed me she would be alone. Then I remembered she had chosen to be alone anyway.

"That's my son!" she screamed. I turned back around and focused on what I was doing. I couldn't falter. Nothing could slip by me. This was to important. Bella's life was to important. Jake opened the door, I heard the familiar ringing bells. They sounded louder then they ever had before. Rose was shoved out first and she walked half way before being met by Mike Newton. He ran her across the line to her waiting husband. Jake stood behind Bella now, the gun pointing into her back. He held her in place with his arm over throat.

"I am sending her out but if I see one weapon I will shoot her." he screamed. I took a quick look around motioning for every one to lower there weapons.

"Edward don't do this." Bella compelled me but what choice did I have? Seeing him hold her that way. Watching him point a gun at her!

"Bella I have too. I messed up all Jake's plans and now I have to pay the price. It's okay. Don't cry. It's okay." I said. Her eyes shut tight. She took a deep breath and shook her head

"No." she said before she stomped down on Jake's foot. He lost his balance and cursed but let her go and she ran to me. Automatically I opened my arms for her even though it was against what I was told to do. She ran into them flinging her arms around my neck. I heard Lilly crying for her. Screaming at her but she didn't move.

"You bitch!" Jake screamed and raised his gun.. I threw Bella to the ground with all the force I had right before Jake raised his gun and shot me in the chest.

A/n- Thanks for all the reviews! I know I am like a cliffie queen right now but I don't mean to. I just stop where it feels natural. I feel like if I force it wont be good. Again thanks for all the reviews!


	21. Chapter 21

Disclaimer: I don't own twilight.

Bella~

I was shaking against Alice in the hospital waiting room. I was freezing cold. I couldn't blink. I couldn't speak. My only thought was of Edward. Edward had been shot in the chest. The bullet narrowly missed his heart and if it had been any closer he would of died instantly. He was in surgery now to remove the bullet and check for further damage. He was looking at a lengthy recovery but the doctors assured me barring no further complication he would be fine but I couldn't shake the awful feeling that this was all my fault. No one was saying it but I knew it was true. I should be dead. It was me Jake should of shot. Not Edward. How did this happen? I looked up at my father sitting across from me in his police uniform, covered in Edward's blood as was I.

"How did this happen?" it was the first thing I had said in hours. My voice was a croak. Barely a harsh whisper among the waiting. I felt Alice's eyes turn from me to my father. Jasper was with Rose and Emmett while Rose got checked out. I had refused the exam.

"It all happened so fast..." my dad said. His gaze never met mine.

"I want to know how this happened and I want to know now." I demanded. Dad finally looked me in the eyes.

"the hostage negotiator said we were running out of time. We had to offer him something." Dad was keeping his voice down. It was clear he didn't need the whole town in on the specifics.

"So you offered him Edward? You offered him Lilly's father? Are you crazy?" I shouted. I rose to my feet, looming over him. He stayed seated not looking at me now.

"It was Edward's idea. He even took the time to get his affairs in order, Bells. He knew exactly what he was doing." Alice came up behind me and pulled me back down next to her. I cuddled into her shoulder and sobbed.  
"You shouldn't of let him do it. Why wasn't he wearing a vest?" I asked between sobs.

"Yes, I'd be interested in knowing the answer to that myself." Elizabeth said from across the waiting room. She walked twords us. It was the first time she had said a word to us. She wouldn't look at Alice or me. She only talked to my father and the other officers. Since Edward went into surgery she hadn't said a word.

"It all happened to fast. In normal hostage situations these things are decided well in advance and the person going in is briefed and ready for what they are doing but this time..." he trailed off.

"this time it was your daughter so my son's life was fore fit?" Elizabeth was beginning to lose her composure. I had only see her lose it one other time and that was her husbands funeral.

"He volunteered." Dad said again. He and Elizabeth were standing toe to toe now.

"And you let him do it? You let my baby walk in there to save her." Elizabeth was shaking from head to toe.

"He had my baby. I would of done anything to get her back." he admitted. Elizabeth reared back and slapped dad across the face as hard as she could. Five officers appeared out of no where, getting between Elizabeth and my Dad. He waived them off. They helped her to a seat across the room where she finally lost it and broke down. I understood how she felt. One half of me knew as a mother the agony she must be going through but the other half of me knew she was the one who kept Edward from me. Alice from Edward and Lilly from Edward as well. I wanted to say she was getting what she deserved but I couldn't. No mother should have to go through this.

Edward~

I was standing at the end of my drive way. I knew it was my driveway but something was different. I turned in a circle looking around me. I had a fence. A white Pickett fence with a gate. One of the ones with the heart carved in it. A child laughed from the back of the yard. Her giggle I would of known anywhere. It was Lilly. She ran around the front of the house followed by a small silky puppy. The dog bounded after her, it's tongue dangling from it's mouth.

"Come inside baby. It's time for dinner." Bella's voice was like an angels song coming from inside the house. I was suddenly warm all over. Utterly content.

"Come on Chance." Lilly scooped her puppy up and ran inside leaving me alone once more. The sun was hitting the house in the most beautiful way. It was spring here in this time and the flowers were blooming. It smelled wonderful like fresh cut grass and sun. it was perfect. I ran up the narrow stone path, opening the door to go inside. The house was as gorgeous inside as it was outside. It was finished. The cascading cherry wood staircase and the walls were painted. I walked from room to room noticing how everything Alice and I bought on our trip was put in place. I laughed to myself thinking she was right, I actually did need all this stuff. I went into the formal living room noticing immediately the row of pictures on the mantel. I picked them up one by one smiling at each one. Lilly and I on Halloween. She was a farmer, I was dressed as a cow. Christmas morning all of us in front of the tree smiling. Bella looking down at Lilly while I stared at Bella in wonder.

"Beautiful, aren't they?" I would know the voice anywhere but it wasn't one I ever expected to hear again. I spun on my heel and smiled,

"DAD!" I shouted running to him. He opened his arms and I walked into them. He was warm. He smelled the same as always. He was in his usual khakis and polo shirt with penny loafers. I stepped out of our embrace and looked around me. It hit me that something wasn't right.

"I'm dead aren't I?" I asked him. He laughed his usual guffaw and shook his head.

"Not yet." he told me. His eyes were twinkling. My fathers eyes never twinkled. He was never that happy.

"then why are you here?" I wondered. He smiled and offered me his hand.

"I'm here because you want me to be. I can be gone just as quick. Would you like me to go?" he wondered.

"No!" I shouted. He offered his hand to me. With complete trust I took it.

"You've been busy. I trust you figured out my riddle." he smiled. I should have been angry with him over what happened with Alice but I couldn't be. I was to happy to see him.

"Alice. My best friend for all those years and I never knew." I said in awe. He smiled,

"Come now Edward, you know she wasn't your best friend. That title has always been Bella's." I nodded in agreement.

"Is Bella okay?" I asked him.

"She's perfect, a bit banged up but you know that couldn't be helped." he pulled me into the backyard. It was so lush and green. An enormous swing set sat in the middle of the yard. Dad took a seat on one swing. I took his lead and did the same. I watched as I came out of the back door and retrieved burgers and hot dogs off the grill. I looked great. I was almost glowing and not shot which was a real bonus. Bella followed me out a moment later. She took my breath away. She was wearing a soft green sun dress and sandals. Her hair was swept back half way. She ran her hand down my back and over my butt. I blushed in spite of myself. Dad pretended not to notice.

"Why Mrs. Masen you little flirt." I scolded playfully. Suddenly the food was unimportant. I took her in my arms and kissed her passionately. It was deep and soulful. The way she should be kissed every day.

"Not Mrs. Masen yet. Three more weeks." she said wistfully.

"And how are your feet my love? Cold at all?" I wondered aloud. She bit her lip in the way that drove me crazy and shook her head,

"Nope. Toasty warm. Getting warmer by the day. If I hadn't promised Alice this wedding we'd be married by now." I kissed her forehead and smiled.

"You were nice to do that for her you know. She loves a party." I told her. She laughed,

"She's your sister. I couldn't say no." She told me. I kissed her neck gently for a moment or two before we collected dinner and walked inside hand in hand. Dad and I just listened to everything around us. We sat there for a while in a comfortable silence.

"Dad?" I said quietly.

"Yes son?" he replied.

"Is this heaven?" I asked. He smiled,

"I suppose to you it seems that way. This is all you've ever wanted. Bella and Lilly. The house on maple street. Personally, I think if this is heaven i'd take it." he looked up to a second story window. A light flickered on. Lilly appeared at the window dressed for bed. Her puppy at her side. She waved down at us. On instinct I waved back. Dad blew her a kiss and she blew one back.

"can she see us?" I asked.

"she see's me. You aren't dead. She talks to me you know." he said still looking at her window.

"I'm always with her. Watching out for her. Caring for her. Loving her the way I would have if I had lived to see what you've created before us. I'm always with you and Alice too. I loved you both so much that even when my time was over I couldn't really leave." he said.

"it's time for me to go back." I sensed it. My time with him was over.

"I never really leave you. I'm the breeze in your hair or the tinkle in Lilly's laugh. I'm always there. Sometimes you just have to look hard to see me." he stood up opening his arms for me again. I embraced him as tightly as I could.

"I love you Dad. Thank you for everything." I said over tears. He smiled,

"I love you Edward." he said fading from my arms. I heard it then, Alice's voice saying my name. It was like she was all around me.

"Edward." she said. I spun around looking for her. She wasn't there.

"Edward." she called again but I couldn't see her. The house in front of me faded away. The grass went out beneath my feet. It was getting brighter and brighter until finally I closed my eyes. When I opened them again, I was home.

A/n- I am so sorry this is so late. I've had so much family stuff going on and I wasn't able to finish or post anything. Hopefully things will settle down now and I'll get into a regular pattern again. Thanks for being patient.


	22. Chapter 22

Disclaimer-I don't own Twilight.

Edward~

The days following the shooting were strange to say the least.

When I woke up I was informed that my mother was asking for Charlies resignation as chief of police. I also learned Jake was in serious condition after being shot in the leg.

He didn't require surgery but lost a lot of blood.

He would recover and stand trial as far as anyone could tell. The entire town was pretty much rocked by what happened.

No one ever thinks there will be a hostage crisis in there local coffee house. Rose was fine but she and Emmett had been suspiciously absent since she was released from the hospital three days before me. She wasn't seriously injured but they were being careful.

Jasper was mum on there sudden absence.

A week after my surgery I was released to go home. My mother wanted me to go home with her. I was all for it until she said Bella and Alice couldn't visit. I declined her offer politely.

Bella wanted me to come and stay with her but she had Charlie and Lilly to attend too.

Plus, we didn't want to confuse Lilly any further. She was having a hard time with all the sudden changes and no one really having answers to her questions.

Jasper offered to take me home with him but when Bella and Alice declared his bachelor pad a pig sty the idea was quickly panned.

That left Alice. I was more then happy staying with my sister and she seemed more then happy to have me.

Staying with Alice was something I really did enjoy.

It was nice being with her all the time. I couldn't believe I had been friends with her my entire life but there was still so much about her I didn't know. For instance, she eats ketchup on her eggs. I eat ketchup on my eggs too and the little things like that really made me feel bonded to her.

I knew I should tell her about our Dad and seeing him. I didn't know if what I saw was a hallucination brought on by the drugs or if it actually was a near death experience.

Every time I tried to tell her something got in the way. She needed to know Dad loves her or at least my hallucinated Dad loved her.

Every time I closed my eyes, which was a lot because being shot and having surgery really takes it out of you, I saw my dream all over again.

My finished house, Lilly and her little dog. Bella so beautiful and care free. I wished I could make Bella feel that way now but with everything going on we barely got two seconds alone. She was blaming herself for what happened.

I wasn't guessing that from her fatigued eyes or the five or six pounds she'd lost since it all happened. She actually told the police investigator from the State of Washington that this was all her fault.

I wanted to hold her.

I wanted to unburden her mind and just be with her for a while.

Away from my mother, her father, our daughter with to many questions and not enough answers.

Bella wasn't sleeping because Lilly wasn't sleeping. She was having nightmares about the stand off almost nightly. She only slept soundly when her poor little body was to exhausted to stay awake.

She hadn't returned to school because she didn't want to face the questions and stares of her classmates. We didn't want her to have to either.

We both knew eventually she would have to go back but we were hoping we could let this blow over first. Bella brought Lilly over daily to visit.

My arm was in a sling and I was to exhausted to walk over and visit them so they came over for a couple hours everyday.

Most of the time we ate dinner and then Lilly would curl up on my good side and watch a movie until she fell asleep. We left her that way as long as we could just so she could get some kind of rest. While Lilly slept Bella would sit by the side of Alice's couch with her head on my stomach. I would stroke her hair and take joy in the comfortable silence.

Tonight was no exception. We were alone after dinner because Alice was meeting with Carlisle to deal with all the legal issues regarding the will and our inheritance.

It needed to be done but I didn't want to be bothered with it. Alice had agreed to manage it and I was more then grateful. Lilly was asleep in my lap while the end of Cinderella played on the TV screen. Bella was doing dishes in the kitchen.

I moved Lilly onto the couch with my good arm and covered her up. It was slow going but I was so tired of asking people to do things for me.

When Lilly was situated and covered up I walked into the kitchen.

Bella's back was to me, she was standing with her palms on the counter head bent over. Her body shivered and shook. She was crying.

"Baby, what's wrong?" I asked her from the door way. She turned to me wiping her eyes with the heels of her hands.

"Nothing. I'm fine." she lied. I walked over to her, tipping her face up to meet mine.

"You aren't fine. Why wont you tell me what's wrong?" I pursed my lips waiting for an answer. She turned her face from me closing her eyes.

"I'm fine. I have to be fine. I'm sorry you had to see that." she whispered. I was dumfounded.

"I want to see that! Not that I like it when you cry but it's at least some show of emotion. I've been so worried about you since..." I didn't need to say it. We both knew what had happened. She groaned grabbing a tissue from the counter then wiping her eyes.

"I have to be fine because I have a little girl who's terrified to sleep. She's sad all the time except when she's with you. I can't break down right now because if I do I don't know when it will stop. I have to be strong. I'm the mom here and There is no losing it in front of the kid." she said sternly.

"You don't have to be strong all the time. I can bare some of the load. Aren't we equals? Isn't that whats supposed to happen when she has a mom and a dad?" I was new at parenting but not new at Bella. She was trying to take all of the burden on herself the way she had for seven years.

"Edward, I can handle all of this! I'm fine." she screeched but then started to cry again. I walked over placing my good arm around her neck bringing her against my chest. I kissed her forehead gently.

"Bella why don't we call Charlie, have him come get Lilly and we can talk. I mean really talk. I know everything has moved really fast. Maybe to fast..." I was worried she was regretting her decisions about me being Lilly's father. Like maybe she thought all of this could have been avoided if I had just stayed gone. She nodded, pulled out her cell and made the call. Charlie and Sue came fifteen minutes later to take a still (thankfully)sleeping Lilly home.

Bella and I sat on Alice's deck steps enjoying the autumn night not really sure where to start. One of us had too I just didn't want to be the one.

"I'm sorry." she whispered so low I almost didn't hear her. I looked at her puzzled,

"Baby, there's nothing to be sorry for. Jake was delusional. He had issues. No one knew. It's over now." I assumed she was talking about the shooting. When she started to bawl I knew it was something else.

"I have to tell you because I don't think I can live with myself if I don't." she wiped her hand down her face.

"Nothing you can say will make me stop loving you." I told her. She laughed syncially,

"I wouldn't say that." she said. She blew out a deep breath, "I knew where you were." she said to me. I didn't understand what she meant at first but then it clicked.

"When I was in New York?" I asked. She nodded, "When Lilly was born your dad came to see me. He gave me everything I needed. Home phone, cell phone, address. He told me he knew the truth and when I was ready he knew I would call. I was ready that night but I never made the call." she said her eyes over flowing with tears.

"Why didn't you?" I was staring at her fighting off the tremble I was feeling. It wasn't anger or rage. It was sadness. All these years she knew where I was.

"At first it was fear. I thought you would of found someone else and I couldn't deal with that at all. Then it was rage. I was so angry with you for everything. Getting me pregnant, breaking up with me in that damn letter. And then at the end it was punishment. I think part of me was punishing you for leaving and writing the book and everything." her honesty was shocking to me but I didn't let it show.

"Bella we both fucked up here. We can play this game for the rest of our lives. Blaming ourselves, blaming each other. It's fruitless. We can't change it. We can only move forward." I spoke to her softly and placed my finger under her chin, making her look at me. I stared deep into her eyes, "If there is one thing this whole mess has taught me it's that life is going to keep moving whether you want it to or not. I want my everything to keep moving with you. I want us to be a family but we have to forgive each

other first."

"How can you forgive me? I cost you the last seven years of your Dad's life!If I had just called you, you would of come home. You wouldn't of been dragged back here for your dad. You would have had years with him. I would of never dated Jake. We might have had more kids by now."

Bella stroked my sling gently her lower lip shaking, "this is all my fault."

I couldn't tell her I wouldn't change any of it because I would, in a heart beat. I would of come home, not kicking and screaming but for her. For my family but it was to late now. I shook my head, "I can't say I wouldn't change it because I would. I miss my Dad every single day. I miss him so much but this isn't your fault. I could of come home. It's not like I didn't have the time or the money. When the book came out I could pretty much guess how it had gone over around here. I wasn't an idiot. I stayed gone to avoid facing what I had put in print. Plus I thought you had moved on. That killed me. I couldn't come home." I smiled in spite of the conversation we were having, in spite of my throbbing arm and my aching head. " but now I can't imagine spending one day away from you. I love you. I live for you. I'd die for you and I almost did. I would do again in a heart beat if it meant keeping you safe for one second. You are my life." I felt the tears run down my face. Bella leaned her forehead into mine. I caressed her face with my good hand and smiled.

"I love you so much and I almost lost you. I don't sleep at night because every time I do I replay everything in my dreams but you die and I feel so empty and so alone. I just got you back and I almost lost you." she sobbed. I wrapped my arm around her bringing her into my chest. She wrapped her arms around me.

"I'm not going anywhere. I love you and I'm going to be right here forever. As soon as that damn house is done I'm moving into it and I want you to live there with me. I want to...."I stopped before it could come out. This wasn't the right time or place. Bella sat up looking into my eyes,

"You want to what?" she asked. A little half smile playing at her lips.

"I want to marry you." I whispered to her. Her eyes twinkled for the first time in a week,

"Are you asking me?" she said shyly. I kissed her forehead and inhaled her scent.

"This isn't the right time." I sighed. She caressed my face and the light hit the gold chain around her neck. I gently slid my finger down the chain until my class ring popped out of her shirt.

"You kept it?" I held it up between us.

"I couldn't part with it. Every time I tried I nearly panicked and gave up."she blushed. I leaned in and kissed her full lips. I slid my hand into her hair bringing her closer to me. She groaned low in her throat when I licked her lips looking for entrance. Then our tongues moved together over and over again. Her fingers wound into my hair. She moved up on to her knees then straddled my lap. My mind was running over all the ways I could make love to her with the stupid sling on but none of them did her justice. I slid my hand down her side, cupping her ass in my hand dragging her closer to me. She broke the kiss by kissing over my jaw and down my neck. She remembered every little sweet spots, every little place that made it infinitely harder to stop. Luckily I didn't have to stop her. Alice's garage door went up signaling us to disengage.

"I've never wanted you more then I do right now." she admitted with a little sigh. I smiled,

"When this stupid sling comes off I am going to whisk you away somewhere with no phones and no clocks then it's going to be enough loving to make up for seven years apart." I whispered in her ear.

She sighed, "Oh that sounds like heaven." I grinned know ing exactly what my heaven was like. I smoothed her hair away from her face and ran my finger down her delicate little nose.

"So will you move in with me?" I asked hopefully already knowing the answer but like always Bella surprised me.

"I can't. I have to think of Lilly. She's never been away from my Dad and she's so confused already." I saw the nervousness and panic come back to Bella's eyes. Our fleeting moment of happiness over with.

"What if we talk to her? You know let her ask her questions and give her the best answers we can." I cocked my head to the side and waited for her answer.

"We can try it but I don't make any guarantees. She comes first, remember?" I did remember and she was right, Lilly had to be the priority. Shortly after that Bella and I were bot exhausted. I kissed her goodnight and she left. I missed her the second we were apart.

That night in my bed at Alice's I ran over the day's events in my mind. I smiled over a memory not forgotten but deeply buried in my mind. Sometimes it was to vivid and sometimes it just hurt to much to remember but tonight was different. I closed my eyes and watched it play out again in my mind.

It was the night of the prom and while the rest of the senior class was partying Bella and I went to our meadow. We laid there under a blanket we swiped from her house. Her bare body was so warm next to mine. She was so beautiful, so perfect. I rolled us over on to our sides. I smiled at her and ran my hands into her dark soft hair. She smiled back at me, "I love you." she whispered like it was a secret. Anyone that looked at us together knew we were in love. I didn't say it back, something else was swirling through my mind.

"Edward, do you love me too?" she asked sweetly. I nodded, "Oh god yes, I love you." she giggled happily and rolled herself on top of me. I loved the feel of her body on top of mine. She was so perfect.

"Bella if I asked you to do something crazy, would you do it?" I was being serious. Her face dropped a little. I rubbed my palms up and down her bare back. "Edward, I'd do anything for you. I love you, I live for you, I'd die for you." I sat up guiding her legs around my waist. I kissed her passionately. She tangled her hands in my hair. I groaned loudly as our kiss broke, I never wanted to stop kissing her.

"This is going to sound nuts but I have to ask you something." I laid my forehead on hers. I watched as her eyes fluttered closed, "Anything Edward, I'll do it." she whispered.

"Will you marry me?" I held her tighter to me. I couldn't let her go right now. Her eyes popped open, a surprising happy grin spread across her face, "YES! OH MY GOD, Yes!" she threw her arms around my neck. I turned us back. I ran my lips gently over hers. She giggled happily beneath me.

"Oh god Bella, we did this all wrong. My parents will kill us if they find out and Charlie will shoot me. I know it. I don't have a ring for you!" I panted against her lips. She reached for my right hand and pulled off my class ring.

"I'll wear it around my neck. We won't tell anyone. Well I have to tell Alice but she won't tell on us. Oh Edward, it will be so perfect. I love you. I can't wait to be your wife!" I took my ring from between her fingers and slipped it on her left hand ring finger, it was much to big but it was more about the gesture.

"I can't wait to be your husband. We're going to be together forever." My words echoed in my head. Bella laughed happily, "Forever and forever and forever!" I kissed behind her again and again never wanting the moment to end.

I climbed out of bed and went over to my sisters bedroom door. Before I could knock she was there in a faded ac/dc tee and guys boxers.

"It's like 2 am, whats up?" she asked half asleep. She went back to her bed waving me in.

"I need your help." I said softly. I couldn't keep the dumb grin off my face.

"Can it wait until day light?" she mumbled. I laughed,

"It's going to have too I'm afraid. Jewelry stores aren't open at night."

"Jewelry?" Alice said her interests peaked.

"I was wondering if you'd help me pick out an engagement ring." I watched Alice sit straight up in bed.

"You're going to ask Bella to marry you?" her voice was thick with emotion.

"Well you know I figure I took a bullet for her. She owes me." I down played it because if Alice started crying I would to and I had had enough tears for one day. Alice sprang from the bed and hugged me a little to tight.

"I'd be so honored! We'll go tomorrow! Oh my god and then we can go to the house afterwords and get it organized, then we can go see Carlisle! Oh my god, an engagement ring. This will be the biggest wedding this town has ever seen! I mean it! No rinky dink wedding for my brother, huh uh. First class all the way." she was rambling now and pacing. Never a good thing for Alice.

"Sis, that might not be what Bella wants. She might not even say yes." I hated to reign her in but I had too.

"Like she's going to say no. please. Have some faith." she rolled her eyes at me. I smiled hoping she was right.

A/n-Hey guys. Thanks for waiting for the update. My personal life is crazy. I just wanted to let every one know this will more then likely be my last update for 2009. if I get another one out that's great but probably not. Have happy holidays and a great new year!


	23. Chapter 23

Disclaimer: I don't own twilight.

Edward~

Alice woke me up bright and early the next day and was more than ready to get started. She chattered endlessly about the different types of rings and different stone types.

"Do you know what kind of ring she wants?" Alice chirped from the drivers seat.

"I'll know it when I see it" I said confidently. Bella would want something classic. Nothing to big of course but what woman would complain about getting a diamond bigger then they imagined. Alice turned up the radio and we sang along all the way to carlisle's office where we signed papers officially accepting our inheritance. After that it was off to port angeles to buy the ring of Bella's dreams.

Bella~

It was the first day I had had a moment alone since everything happened. Alice and Edward were off together on some secret mission I wasn't privy too but I hoped they were having fun. Lilly left with my Dad to go to lunch with Sue. Sue was turning out to be a dream come true. I looked around noticing once again how clean the house looked and how organized everything was. The fridge was stocked and she'd even wiped out all the cabinets and kitchen drawers (something I had never done in my life.) there wasn't really anything for me to do but the coffee house was another story. My dad thought I should let the lease run out and sell off everything. I asked him what I would do if I wasn't slinging coffee. He shrugged and said I could go back to school. Once upon my time it was my dream to get my culinary arts degree and own a restaurant. When I got pregnant I settled for waitressing and then for running the coffee house. It was successful which was nice but it had never been my dream. I floped down in the my fathers battered arm chair and sighed. What was my dream now? Everything was different. Edward was going to be here. He was going to be with me. Forever. The thought made my heart light and filled me with a sense of peace. He had talked of marriage on Alice's deck. Was marriage what I wanted? I closed my eyes, trying to picture it. Me in a flowing white dress and veil walking down the isle on my fathers arm. Edward in a tux glowing with love when he saw me coming to him. My body tingled head to toe. I let out a contented sigh while it played in my head. The vows, our first kiss as man and wife. Edward, Lilly and I living together in my dream house. It was beautiful. It was exactly what I wanted. Everything else could wait, I knew for sure I wanted this right now. And the only person I really wanted to tell was Rose.

Rose had been absent since her release from the hospital. Alice hadn't talked to her. Edward hadn't either. She was questioned by the police and since then no one had talked to her. I felt guilty for not checking on her. I decided while I had the free time I would call her and see what was going on. I called her cell but no answer. Called her house and it was the same story. I got the machine. I unfolded myself from the chair, grabbed my keys and off I went to Rose's house to see what was going on.

The drive from my house to Rose and Emmett's was short. When I arrived Jasper's truck was in the drive way and Emmett's wasn't. I wondered to myself what Jasper was doing here in the middle of the day. He must of heard my jeep because he came out the front door, waving slightly and shutting the door behind him. I climbed out tucking my keys in the pocket of my jeans. He hugged me gently the way he always did.

"Where's Rose? I called but she didn't..." I trailed off. Jasper looked exhausted. I could of carried groceries in the bags under his eyes. His hair hadn't been combed in a week.

"Jasper what's wrong with Rose?" I asked him. He took a step back and put both hands in front of him like he was pushing me back.

"Nothing is wrong with Rose. She is just recovering and needs some quiet." he said calmly. In his eyes I saw pleading. He had something he needed to tell me and badly. Something he was carrying alone.

"Where's Em?" I asked suspiciously.

"Working on Edward's house. He's been working on it like a maniac. He feels like he owes Edward." he said. I eyed him carefully.

"I want to see Rose. I'm going inside." I pushed past him. He grabbed me around my shoulder steering me back to the car.

"She's sleeping." he said.

I sighed, "Hale, you are a terrible liar."

"Yes, Yes I am." he said but offered nothing else. I ducked under his arm and made a mad dash for the front door. I was faster then he was for once. I threw open the front door and the smell hit me instantly. It was god awful but a mother knew the smell anywhere. It was vomit. I walked in slowly trying to identify the source. I saw empty pots and pans and what looked like every trash can they could find sitting at various points around Rose and Em's small living room. I ran through the house calling Rose's name frantically. She groaned from the bathroom. I went in throwing the door open, not waiting for an invitation. Rose was bent over the toilet heaving for all she was worth. I moved her hair off her neck gently.

"Are you alright?" I took a washcloth off the sink, wetting it down then handed it to Rose. She took it gratefully but said nothing. Jasper stood in the door way covering his mouth and nose. I rolled my eyes at him then looked between them waiting for answers.

"Rosie, I'm sorry. She over powered me." Jasper claimed. I laughed loudly. Rose sat down on the side of the tub. She wiped the sweat off her face and then her neck.

"it's okay." she said quietly.

"What's wrong?" I sat down beside her taking her hand in mine. She smiled sadly but looked me in the eyes.

"I'm pregnant.....with twins." Rose said. I squealed with delight but suddenly noticed I was the only happy one in the room.

"Why aren't you happy?" I stood up looking between Rose and her twin brother.

"There could be some complications." Jasper said. I couldn't understand what he was saying. Rose and Emmett were going to have two babies! Why weren't we celebrating?

"When everything happened I had missed my period but didn't know for sure. The doctors confirmed it at the ER that day but they aren't sure what the trauma did to my babies." she said over tears. I gasped softly,

"Something might be wrong with the babies?" I knelled in front of her, my eyes going between her still flat belly and her face. "Rose I'm so sorry." I didn't know what else to say.

"The doctor said the babies are strong and are out of the woods but Rose wanted to wait and tell everyone in a few months." Jasper said still standing in the doorway covering his nose and mouth. Men are such babies. A little vomit and they go all to pieces.

"Bella I wanted to tell you. I really did but I was so scared to get everyone excited and to be excited. I was terrified something would happen and I would lose my babies." Rose trembled on the side of her tub. I stroked her long blond hair and smiled reassuringly the way I did with Lilly when she was scared,

"I think these babies have survived enough to be miracles and I cant wait to meet them." Rose hugged me to her and laughed. I pulled back looking at her. She was just glowing.

Rose filled me in on everything I had missed. She was having awful morning sickness that lasted most of the day. She said she found relief for a few hours a day before it started up again. I felt her pain. Jasper came over when Em left so Rose was never alone even though she assured both her brother and her husband it was fine and women over the years had endured worse. When Jasper left to get her something from the store she confided in me that neither one of them was much help and both gagged every time she got sick. I told her about my talk with Edward. We both agreed it was a good idea to talk to Lilly. Rose and I sat on her couch under a blanket for her few vomit free hours just talking about everything and anything.

Edward~

The ring was perfect and I did know it as soon as I saw it. It was a three stone diamond ring. Two carats in the middle, one carat on each side. For our past, present and future the sales man explained. He could of saved the corny stuff for someone else, the ring was sold the minute I saw it. I picked up a small diamond heart necklace for Lilly. I wanted to get her diamond earrings as well. Alice said I was spoiling her. I bought them for Alice instead. I had to get her a present for taking such good care of me and letting me stay with her. I decided to also start paying her bills when she wasn't home. I knew she had the money now to do these things for herself but I wanted to take care of her anyway I could. She might be mad for a little bit but she would get over it.

We arrived back in Forks around four in the afternoon. Alice insisted we had to go over to the house after she had been on the phone with Emmett off and on all afternoon. We got to the house and the first thing I noticed was there was no equipment in the front yard. No wood or siding or doors. I climbed out of the car. Alice danced over to my side taking my good hand. She pulled me up to the front door. She giggled and clapped,

"Close your eyes!" Alice commanded. I did as she asked. It was no use trying to fight her. The front door opened, I smelled wood and for the first time my house actually smelled good when I stepped inside it. Alice pulled me into the house carefully. She turned me, my eyes still closed. I heard Emmett's laugh behind me.

"Okay ready? Open up!" Alice's wind chime voice called. I opened my eyes. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. It was painted! I had floors. Really nice hard wood floors! There were no holes, no bugs, no mice. The afternoon sun lit up the rooms in the most beautiful way I could imagine.

"How did you guys do all this?" I asked them. Em beamed with pride as Ali began pulling me room to room showing me the remodel.

"Well I worked around the clock." Em said following behind us.

"And I've been helping too. Jasper has too." Alice said.

"You didn't have to do that." I told them gratefully.

"I owe you so much more then this house Edward. Because of what you were willing to do I've now got more then I could of ever hoped for. This was the only way I could say thank you." emotions weren't easy for the big guy. I didn't need to get all sentimental on him. We both knew a smile and a punch on the arm was good enough.

Alice sat me down on a chair I wasn't aware she had bought. She was going through all the things we bought on our first brother sister outing. She was all to happy putting away linens and ordering Emmett around with the heavier things. She even called Jasper demanding his help as well. I wanted to show Em the ring but knew I had to keep it a secret or the surprise I was planning for Bella would be ruined. I felt sort of useless watching them put my stuff away. My phone rang in my pocket. I pulled it out happy to see it was my love calling.

"You are never going to guess where I am." I said with wonder in my voice.. Hello just wouldn't cover it today.

"Where are you?" she wondered. I could hear her smile through her voice.

"I'm sitting in my finished house." I said. She gasped.

"It's done? Like done done? Inhabitable by humans done?" she said in a rush. I laughed,

"Yep. All of the above. Come over! And bring Lilly too. I'm thinking tonight is a good night to have our talk with her." I said getting up to walk around some more.

"Are you sure you're ready? She can be a handful sometimes." Bella warned me. I smiled to myself,

"I'm ready for anything and everything right now." we said our goodbyes and I love you's when the call ended. I couldn't wait to show Bella our home.

Bella, Lilly and I were sitting around the dining room table eating the pizza they picked up on there way over. I had given them the grand tour gently squeezing Bella's hand when we arrived at the master suite. She was amazed by it's high celings. She was particularly excited about the private master bath. My inner horny teenager was already working over the endless possiblities of naughty that could and would happen in that bathroom. I could tell Bella's mind was working over time as well by the blush creeping over her cheeks. I pushed my plate away, smiling a Lilly across from me.

"Are you excited to go back to school Monday?" I asked trying to sound excited for her.

"No. I don't want to go back." she grumbled into her plate before she took another bite of pizza. Bella gently touched her hair.

"She's sad because she missed 'bring your father day.'" Bella nudged my knee gently under the table. I took the hint,

"Lilly would you like me to go to school with you Monday? I can talk to you class about being a writer." I said hesitantly.

"Really? We could do that?" she seemed to brighten a little. I smiled widely,

"Anything you want honey. Just ask." I got up and cleared away our paper plates and then sat back down.

"And you know you can ask us, either me or Mommy anything and we will do our best to give you an answer."

"Anything I want?" she asked. Bella and I looked at each other for a moment before Bella added,

"Anything within reason."

Lilly sat up straighter in her chair. I almost laughed over the little puzzled lines creeping over her brow. She looked so much like Bella when she was looking for the right words. I took a big drink of my soda just as little Lilly dropped one on us,

"Why did you have sex before you were married?" she asked and I spit soda across the table.

"Um..." Bella said in a blind panic.

"Because when I asked where babies come from Mommy said Mommy's and Daddy's have babies after they are married and you shouldn't have sex before you get married even though Johnny and Baby had sex in dirty dancing and they weren't married." My daughter looked between us waiting for an answer.

"You've seen Dirty dancing?" I asked. Lilly rolled her eyes,

"Duh." was all she said. Bella finally snapped out of it and laughed gently,

"Honey as with everything there are exceptions to every rule. Daddy and I loved each other very very much and sometimes things happen we don't plan. We didn't plan to have sex before we were married, it just happened but the best part was we got you. And we wouldn't trade you for anything." she smiled at the end. I could tell by the look on her face she prayed the sex questioning was over.

"Do you love each other now?" Lilly asked. I sighed in relief,

"I love Mommy very very much. More then I've ever loved anyone." I laid my good hand on the table palm up. Bella laid her hand inside mine.

"I love Daddy very much." she said softly.

"Are you going to get married?" Lilly's eyes were twinkling with questions and possibility.

"Would that be okay with you?" I asked her. She nodded,

"Yep. We can live here too. That will make being married very easy for all of us and grandpa too." I cocked my head to the side and smiled,

"Aren't you worried Grandpa will be lonely?" I asked.

"Nope! He's gonna get married too. I told him to marry Sue today at lunch. He said okay. She didn't mind either." Lilly hopped off her chair and went to the bottom of the stairs.

"Where are you going little one?" Bella asked her.

"To pick my room before you have more sex and make a new baby that might get a bigger room then me!" she called down the stairs. Bella laid her head in her hand and groaned something that sounded like "Oh good god." I laughed loudly, I couldn't help it. Bella walked over and sat down in my lap. I swept the hair off her shoulder, caressing her neck gently.

"I love you." she whispered leaning down into a gentle kiss, so sweet it took my breath away.

"And I you my love." I whispered back. We sat like that in perfect comfort, in our home, while our daughter made space for herself in our new house.

A/n- Thanks for all the reviews guys! Okay so one more chapter and an epilogue and then I think we are finished with Long Road Home. I will miss this story so much but I have a bunch of other stories rattling around in my head so not to worry, this wont be my last story. As always read and Review!


	24. Chapter 24

Disclaimer: I don't own twilight.

Bella~

The next few months were a wave of packing and moving us out of my Dad's house while he moved Sue in. I met her kids, Leigh and Seth. They were really nice. We had thanksgiving at Edwards house....Well our house now. Edward went through physical therapy and regained his full range of motion in his shoulder. He spent most days working on his book in between being a room parent for Lilly's class and starting up the construction company. He planned to finish out his contract with his publisher and not sign another. When I asked him why he simply replied that time in his life was over and he was ready for better things.

When all the packing was done and all the dust settled I found myself at our first Christmas as a family. I knew in my heart we weren't complete, Elizabeth still hadn't become a part of our lives. Word gets around in a town this small. And the rumors ran rampant. She was still outraged over the money. She was angry with Edward for accepting Alice so easily. Everyday it was something new and different. We all kept waiting on her to make good on her threat to sell the house and move to Arizona but she hadn't so far. I knew deep inside Edward somewhere he was worried about his mother. He never said it but sometimes when we were driving passed her house he would look over and notice the grass needed mowing or her flowers looked dry. She didn't come out into town much. She would be seen at the grocery store every now and then but never to anything social. Even after all the things, the horrible things, she had done to Edward and I it still broke my heart to see her spending the Holidays alone.

One day at the beginning of December I asked Edward about inviting his Mother to Christmas.

"Bella, I love you for asking but no. let's let sleeping dogs lye. She's moving away. I made my choice and I chose you and Alice." He sat at the dining room table behind his lap top, his thin wire rimmed glasses perched on his nose.

"Love, I know she's awful but she's your mom. You only get one." I pointed out.

"She isn't going to accept my choices. I've accepted that. You should too." he got up from the table and put his coffee mug in the dishwasher. I leaned against the counter watching his every move. He kissed my cheek then went to change to go into the office. Thoughts rolled over in my mind. Was Edward right? Was his relationship with Liz a lost cause? I had never been a meddler. That was always Alice's department but something inside me said to meddle. I waited for Edward to leave before I left too, totally unsure of how this would turn out.

It was cold in Fork's for early December. I stood at the end of Liz's drive way for a few minutes. I pulled my coat around me for warmth. I knew more then likely she would reject me. I was prepared for that. I didn't know what it was going to be like if she rejected Lilly. That would be too much for me. I decided if that was the case then I'd be done with it. I'd let it go as Edward asked me too. If that's what happened. I really hoped it wouldn't come to that. I was walking up the drive way as she opened the door. Her hair had gone gray. She must of given up coloring it. Her face was free of make up. It looked like years were added around her eyes and mouth. I walked bravely up the sidewalk. When I reached the porch we didn't exchange words, she just stepped aside, letting me go inside.

"May I take your coat Isabella?" she asked with awkward politeness. I didn't feel unwelcome but it was just as awkward as I imagined it would be.

"I don't know how long I'm staying." I said honestly. She nodded,

"I understand. Have you come for Edward's things...I tried to box them up but I..." her voice cracked. I put my hand on her shoulder gently.

"No. I haven't come for Edward's stuff. He doesn't know I'm here." I mustered a tight smile. She nodded in understanding,

"He's very proud. He wont be happy you're here." she said.

"You're very proud too, Liz." I pointed out. She walked into the kitchen. I followed behind her. She motioned for me to take a seat at the table while she poured coffee for both of us. I looked around and noticed the house was absolutely bursting with photos, more so then usual.

"You've added a lot of pictures." I said to her.

"they're all I have now. I've lost my husband...my son. I have nothing but memories now." she sat down at the table placing the fine china cups of coffee in front of us. I folded my hands on the table top,

"It doesn't have to be this way." I said. Her eyes flickered up to mine for a moment then she looked away.

"It does. I've done to many horrible things. I said to many horrible things and the years in which I did them are gone now. They cant be taken back or erased." she put her hand over her mouth to stop the sob she didn't want to get out. She looked out the kitchen window to compose herself for a moment.

"Time can be made up for. Edward has a whole life you could be apart of if you wanted. It would take so little..." I trailed off.

"What you consider a little is a lot to me. You are so young. Time is laid out in front of you like a endless path. My path is short now and it gets shorter every day." She said seriously. I wasn't prepared for this. I wasn't ready for her to be so human. It seemed the woman from the hospital, the Liz that was screaming and fighting was long gone.

"Then why waste your time being angry?" I asked her. She looked stricken for a moment,

"You think I'm angry? Why would I be angry?" she said.

"Because of Edward's choices."

"I'm not angry with Edward, Senior or Junior. I'm angry with myself." she took a few deep breaths before she continued,

"When I found out Cindy was pregnant I should of left him. I made him miserable until his dieing day by forcing him to stay with me, by making him stay away from his daughter. For a while I tricked myself into thinking they were a fling. I made myself believe he truly did love me. We weren't staying together for Edward. He loved me. I told myself the lie so often I made it my own truth. What I did to him was nothing in comparison to what I did to Edward and to Alice and to...." her eyes met mine again for a moment.

"To me. What you did to me." I finished for her. She nodded slowly.

"Yes. I dare say your mother would be ashamed of me. She would hate me if she knew what I had done to you." I thought this over for a moment. I didn't have many memories of my mother but what I did know of her was that she was free spirited. My father called her almost child like.

"She wouldn't hate you. I don't think it was in her nature but she would expect you to make it right." I opened my purse and got out Lilly's current school picture and a pen. I wrote our phone number and Lilly's age, year and grade on the back. I slid it across to her. She picked it up gently and looked it over.

"She looks so much like you." she commented.

"More like Edward I think." I smiled slightly, "You have a grand daughter. She's pretty feisty and she's a handful. If we could all put this mess behind us then we might have a real shot at a family."

"where would I even begin?" she asked me.

"I would start with accepting Edward's choices and then apologizing." I told her.

"You mean accepting you and your daughter? And Alice?" she said. She sounded nervous.

"I mean accepting Lilly as Edwards and accepting Alice as Edward's sister. As for accepting me I have to tell you it doesn't matter if you do or you don't because I'm going to be here regardless. Edward is the love of my life." I stood up from the table to leave. She stood up too. She took a step and embraced me. I hugged her gently back.

"Has he asked you to marry him yet?" she inquired.

"Nope but I'm not in a hurry. Things are pretty good just as they are." I smiled at her as we stepped apart, "think about what I said Liz. Edward's already lost his father. He needs you."

"I'll think about it. Thank you Bella for coming over. It showed a lot of strength and character." it was high praise coming from her. I just smiled and showed myself out, praying she would listen and try to make things right with her son.

Edward~

My cell phone rang as I was walking into Lilly's school. I pressed the accept button on Alice's call.

"Sis! What's up?" I asked happily.

"Your mom was just here." she said. I nearly dropped the phone.

"for what?" I wondered aloud. I hadn't spoken to her or of her really in months.

"She came to apologize. She gave me some of Dad's stuff. His watch. A few pictures." I was dumbfounded. "Edward? Are you there?" she asked me.

"Yeah, I'm here I just don't know what to say. Did she seem sincere or is this a trick?" I asked.

"It was pretty freaking sincere. She hugged me and she told me she accepted me as your family and she hoped for my forgiveness. Maybe that rumor about her being on Valium was true. Maybe she's all doped up and on some kind of 'forgive me my sins' kick." Alice mused.

"I don't know what to say."

"Well think of something. She's headed your way." she told me and hung up. I went into Lilly's classroom totally preoccupied by what could possibly happen next.

I drove Lilly home after school. She seemed to like having me in her classroom. I often wondered how soon the novelty of having a father would wear off. I hoped never but knew it would sometime. We pulled up in the drive way, I noticed immediately my mothers caddy was parked beside Bella's jeep.

"Who's here?" Lilly wondered and hopped out of the car. She ran for the front door, to quickly for me to catch her.

"I'm home!" she announced dropping her bag and taking off her shoes. She ran into the kitchen with me hot on her heels. Sitting at the kitchen table was my mother, drinking coffee with Bella like it was the most normal thing in the world. I grasped Lilly's shoulder pulling her back to me. They both stood up. Nervousness crossed Bella's features. She looked at me then my mother then me again. She was waiting for something but I didn't know what she expected.

"Lilly can you go play in your room for a little while?" Bella asked her.

"Who's that Daddy?" Lilly looked up at me. I squeezed her shoulder, smiling at her in a reassuring way.

"It's a friend of Mommy and Daddy's. Please go play in your room. I'll be up in a bit to help you with your homework." Lilly walked out of the kitchen and went upstairs. I looked at my mother and back at Bella. It felt like forever before one of us spoke.

"If you are angry with anyone here, be angry with me. I went to her." Bella said, "I'm going to give you two a moment alone." she walked from the room, arms crossed over her chest. She caught my eye on her way out. The look told me to act like an adult. I wasn't sure in this situation I was capable.

"Why are you here?" I asked her. She smiled slightly.

"I miss you." she said. I ran my hand through my hair and sighed.

"Mom, you cant do this. It's got to be all of us or none of us. I can't have two separate lives in this town." I told her. She put her hand up to stop me.

"I know you cant and I don't expect you too. It's unfair and I want to be done with unfair. I want you to finally have everything you deserve and that includes Bella, Lilly and Alice." she motioned for me to join her at the table. I walked reluctantly over and sat down. She turned her chair to face mine. She put out her hand palm down and I took it.

"I messed up Edward. In the simplest of terms. I screwed up. I made your father miserable. I ruined Alice's life and I almost ruined yours. I will never be able to tell you how happy I am so see what you've created. You have a beautiful home and a lovely little girl. Bella is wonderful. I'm so proud and your father would have been too." she smiled warmly. I sensed the 'but' coming.

"But?" I interjected. She sighed.

"I don't deserve your forgiveness or Alice's but I'd like it. I would like the chance to be apart of your life as must or as little as you'll let me." her words rolled around in my brain for a moment or two. I squeezed her hand.

"No more lies. No more secrets. You have to accept my choices and the people I love even if you don't love them too." I said. She nodded,

"I understand completely." she said. The trust lost between us would take time to rebuild and it wouldn't be over night but I knew my father would want me to try.

"Can I meet my grand daughter? Please?" the hope shining my mothers eyes made me smile. She was going to fall as helplessly in love with Lilly as I had. I excused myself from the kitchen and went to the bottom of the stairs. Bella was waiting in the formal living room waiting for me.

"Well?" she asked. I rolled my eyes and called for Lilly. Bella joined me at the bottom of the stairs, wrapping one arm around my waist. I kissed her head.

"Mad at me?" she wondered. I laughed lightly,

"Nope but I am grateful." I told her. She breathed a sigh of relief.

"That's what I was hoping for." She said. Lilly joined us and together we all went in the kitchen so Lilly could meet her grandmother for the very first time.

A/n- I appreciate every one's patience. I finally got time so the first thing I did was write. I hope you enjoy it.


	25. Chapter 25

Disclaimer: I dont own twilight. (lemons ahead. You've been warned!)

Edward~

"I don't think I'm going over board." I stated plainly. Bella rolled her eyes.

"Edward, she's seven. She doesn't need all these clothes. I know its our first Christmas but..." She trailed off knowing this was once again an argument she wasn't going to win. So far for Christmas Lilly had gotten an Ipod, a hot pink and neon green lap top, some computer games, a new bike and all the accessories and now clothes. She told me what she wanted more then anything was clothes from a specific store. The name of the store had something to do with Justice but inside everything was bright, shiny and the Jonas Brothers were playing loudly. It was in short Lilly's kind of store.

"I have a lot to make up for!" I reminded her once again. She stroked my cheek gently. My eyes closed and I leaned into her palm. It was warm against my skin and the feeling was nothing short of amazing.

"You did nothing wrong but if this is what's going to make you happy..." she finished with a resigned sigh.

"Will it make Lilly happy?" I wondered out loud.

"Edward you've bought one of everything in the store practically." Bella reminded me.

"So that's a yes?" I asked. Bella nodded.

"Good." I smiled at the sales associate whom handed me back my credit card and filled the dolly with bags. There was nothing for us to carry because apparently when you buy this much stuff they take it to your car for you. I would of carried it home on my back if it would of made Lilly smile. I took Bella's hand as we walked to the car behind our dolly of purchases.

"What can I do to make your day today?" I was taking it on as my personal mission in life to do one thing a day to make Bella happy.

"Your still here. So I'm happy." she responded as she did almost everyday. I kissed her temple gently.

"Give me one thing I can do to make you happy today...just one. Anything your heart desires." I reminded her. Bella's brow crinkled the way it did when she was thinking very hard. Immediately she lit up.

"Will you help me wrap all this stuff?" she asked smiling at me.

"Of course. But I'm not a very good wrapper. They may look a bit strange in the end." I warned. Bella laughed,

"I'll teach you. It's easy." she promised. What Bella didn't know was that I had some wrapping of my own to do. She was completely unaware that in just two days on Christmas morning I was planning to propose to her in front of our family and friends. It was all arranged and everyone was in on it except Bella and Lilly. Bella for obvious reasons but Lilly was in the dark because she couldn't keep a secret to save her life, a trait I am sure she got from Alice.

My Sister of course master minded the entire thing. From making sure everyone showed up on time to making sure I had the exact right outfit for the occasion. (she insisted this was important even though I had no earthly idea why.) Everyone was coming for a late afternoon Christmas dinner then gifts. If everything went right and she said yes it would be perfect. Bella watched quietly as the bags were loaded into the car. I was watching her. It was amazing to me that I never tired of staring at her. I never tired of watching her, waking up next to her every morning and falling asleep with her at night. Making love to her. She was my everything. In a few short months Bella and Lilly were my entire world and I had never felt more love and contentment. I wrapped both my arms around Bella, bringing her against my chest right there in the mall parking lot. It was a challenge with our winter coats on. I kissed her forehead gently as she rubbed my back.

"I love you." I reminded her softly. She nodded, her ear against my chest.

"I love you too. Forever and always." she leaned up on her tips toes and kissed me. I smiled and caressed her face with my gloved hands. After a few moments the sales clerk loading the car cleared his throat. We both laughed as we broke apart. I tipped him generously, opened Bella's door and once she was safely inside I climbed in as well. As always I couldn't wait to get home.

Lilly was helping Charlie finish his shopping so Bella and I were alone. When you have a seven year old it's a rarity to have the house to yourselves. Once we were home I decided that taking advantage of an empty house was a much better use of our time then wrapping gifts. I didn't even wait for Bella to get her coat off before I was kissing her passionately anywhere my lips would touch. She giggled softly running her hands down my coat. She undid the buttons deftly, pushing it off my shoulders eagerly. Her lips caught mine finally and just like every time we kissed my heart pounded in my chest, my breath was ragged and there was nothing I wanted more in the moment then all of her. I unzipped her coat and tossed it on the floor. She stepped back suddenly, her lips swollen, eyes lidded.

"What's wrong?" I asked. She giggled and wrapped her arms around my neck. My arms immediately went around her waist.

"We were rushing and there's no need. We are totally wonderfully alone until dinner time." she leaned down and gently began kissing my neck while she slowly pulled my shirt out of my pants. I caught on to her thinking. I smiled letting my hands gently roam over her body. She wanted slow. She wanted me to make love to her and that's what she would get. Her tiny beautiful fingers traced over my stomach. My erection strained against my jeans. As if she knew exactly what I needed she undid the button and slowly unzipped them. I sighed in relief. She kissed along my neck as she undid the buttons on my

shirt kissing the skin as she exposed it. I was more then enjoying the attention I was receiving but I didn't want it to be one sided. I bent slightly, gathered her in my arms and walked up our stairs. She kissed me deeply and didn't stop until we reached our bed. I laid her gently there and finished taking my shirt off, tossing it behind me. I looked down at her, staring deeply in her eyes as I slowly and deliberately removed every piece of her clothing. I kissed over her perfect breasts, down her stomach paying special attention to every mark and scar she had incurred during her pregnancy with Lilly. She was embarrassed the first time we made love because her body was no longer as it had been. She was right, it was better. So much better. I took her shoes off while licking and kissing her navel. She wiggled beneath my lips. I smiled tossing the shoes behind me. I pulled her jeans off letting them fall down the side of the bed. She was wearing nothing now but a matching black satin bra and pantie set. I groaned against her soaking wet satin covered mound,

"So pretty." I whispered hooking my fingers in the sides of her panties and gently removed them. I kissed her gently before tasting her. She moaned my name when I licked her clit. I took it gently between my teeth, flicking it with my tongue. She panted underneath me. Her hands fisted in my hair, she raised her legs up bending at the knees. It only made it easier for me for me to kiss, lick and suck every inch of her glorious center. I stroked her gently with my index finger before I entered her and kept moving my tongue across her clit. She cried out when it became to much for her and she came hard against my finger. I loved knowing I made her do that. I kissed my way back up her body, discarding my jeans and boxers on the way. She was still panting when she tossed me on my back. I forced my eyes open when she climbed on top of me in nothing but her bra. Her hair was a wild mass of curls. It went beautifully with her swollen lips. Without a word between us she slid down on me. She braced both of her hands on my chest for leverage. I held on tightly to her hips. Bella rolled her hips in the most delicious way imaginable. I closed my eyes and called her name.

"Bella. Oh god my Bella." I cried trying desperately to hold on until I felt her come apart just one more time. She leaned back giving me a view of myself inside her. After that it was all but impossible to hold on. I cried out and so did she. Her flesh tightened around me and I was gone.

Afterwords we laid quietly in our bed naked on top of the blankets. Suddenly she giggled wildly.

"You know...I'm naked here and the giggling is kind of making me self conceious." I told her. She sat up leaning on her elbow. She stroked my stomach gently,

"Mister you have nothing to worry about." she told me and then continued, "I was just wondering how long this part lasts."

"Which part?" I asked. She sighed happily,

"The sexy part. The part where we ravage each other every chance we get." her voice was like silk.

"Well I always assumed with the right person it doesn't end." I said. It was the truth and my hope was that for Bella and I it would be true.

"So you think we will still be hot for each other in our seventies?" she asked. I smiled,

"I'll be hot for you until the day I die. I promise you that." I brought her into my chest, snuggling into her gently. We stayed like that, resting contentedly in each others arms until it was time for dinner with Charlie.

December 25th came quickly. All day my palms were sweating and I couldn't control my heart beat. Alice and I had been texting most of the morning after Bella, Lilly and I opened our gifts. I didn't realize until I had seen everything wrapped that perhaps, as Bella had said, I did go over board. With every rip of wrapping paper Lilly shrieked, giggled and clapped happily. Bella simply smiled and watched her. Every minute that passed I became more and more nervous. What if I had read the signals wrong? She seemed to love living with me but what if marriage isn't what she wanted? The ring box in my pocket began to feel like a weight. Half of me wanted to drop the fan fair and just do it. If she said no it would be like ripping off a band aid...but if she said yes that's how she would remember it for the rest of her life. She would remember it all. The sweaty palms, the terrified expression. No, she deserved better. She was worth more then my half assed attempt at a proposal. I resigned myself to stay with the plan as it was. I looked up the clock in the living room. Only 2 more hours and every one would be here. Bella nudged me gently with her elbow.

"Edward is everything alright?" she asked me.

"Fine darling. Why do you ask?" I forced a smile to my face.

"Lilly was talking to you but it was like you were somewhere else entirely." she bit her lower lip gently. I had to get it together. This wasn't like me at all. I held my hand out to Lilly and smiled wide.

"I'm sorry honey. What did you ask me?" she rolled her eyes then stepped to me with her new laptop in her hands.

"Will you help me set it up?" she asked brightly. I nodded eagerly, settling back into the couch with my daughter beside me.

"I'll leave you two to it. I'm going to go finish dinner." Bella said. I caught her hand as she walked by. I smiled at her. The smile she loved, the smile that was just for her.

"I'll take care of dinner. Why don't you go get ready. You can wear the sweater I got you." I suggested. Anything to get her upstairs so I could calm down. She raised an eye brow at me,

"Okay...I'll wear my new diamond earrings too?" she asked like a question. I nodded.

"Yeah mom and jeans. Your dark ones from American eagle with dark flats." Lilly added. Bella laughed,

"Whatever you two say. You guys are acting weird." she shook her head and I waited until I heard the bedroom door shut before I let out a strangled breath.

"Daddy are you gonna throw up?" Lilly asked me. I laughed out loud.

"No honey I'm fine. Promise." I stroked her hair gently, trying to reassure both of us.

"Whatever it is you can tell me. _I _wont get mad or upset." she was a dear girl. So sweet and so bright. I was so lucky.

"I have a gift for mommy and I am waiting until everyone arrives to give it to her. It's making me a bit nervous is all." I told her honestly.

"Is it pretty?" Lilly asked.

"I think so."

"She'll like it. Don't be nervous daddy." her brow crinkled like Bella's for a moment.

"Would it make you feel better if I helped you give it to her?" Lilly asked. I thought it over for a moment and smiled. This included Lilly as well. It wasn't just our lives I was changing, it was hers too.

"Yes Darling. I think I would feel better if you helped me. But you must keep it a secret. We don't want to ruin mom's surprise, do we?" I eyed her carefully waiting to see if she was ready. She nodded in conclusion. I pulled the tiny box from my pocket and opened the lid. Lilly sucked in strangled breath and then squealed. I quieted her down and shoved the ring in my pocket.

"I'm going to ask mommy to marry me but you have to keep it a surprise. Promise me." I said sternly.

"Oh daddy! I wont tell her. I promise! I'm so excited!" she exclaimed.

"Me too, baby. Me too.." I said softly.

Two hours had never passed so slowly in my life. Bella finished getting ready. She was wearing the robins egg blue cashmere sweater I gave her this morning and her diamond earrings. She was in the kitchen singing Christmas songs along with the radio as she readied everything for our family to arrive. Like clock work the door bell rang. Lilly ran to open the door with me right behind her. Alice, Rose and Em all came in out of the cold. Hugs were exchanged by everyone. Rose went into the kitchen to sit with Bella. She was getting bigger by the day. Em and Alice helped Lilly and I carry gifts into the living room. Lilly arranged them around the tree. Alice was practically bouncing in place.

"Are you ready? Are you nervous? Do you need a minute to yourself? Something to drink? Emmett get the man something to drink!" she babbled. I placed my hands firmly on her shoulders.

"Al, I'm fine. Please stop bouncing." Em guffawed next to me.

"Ali your going to make me need a drink if you don't stop. Everything is going great. Right Edward?" I nodded at him trying not to let on how nervous I truly was. The door bell rang again and off Lilly went. This time it was my mother, Carlisle and his wife along with Bella's father and Sue.

"Grandma!" Lilly cried arms outstretched to her. My mom bent down showering her with kisses and hugs. I extended my hand to Charlie. He shook it firmly.

"Merry Christmas!" I said. He smiled,

"It will be if this all works out." he said handing me a case of beer. I couldn't of agreed more. Bella stepped out of the kitchen ushering everyone in the formal dining room. I didn't realize all the work she had put into this dinner until that moment. She'd made a honey ham and a turkey with all the trimmings for both. Tall white tapered candles were in silver holders in the center of the table and it was set with the finest china we had, courtesy of my shopping trip with Alice. My mother put her arm over Bella's shoulders.

"This is beautiful honey. You didn't have to do all this." she said. Bella's cheeks tinted from my mothers praise.

"it's nothing. I just wanted it to be special. You only get your first Christmas a family once." she said. Em laid his hand over his wife's growing belly clearly echoing the sentiment. Charlie sat at the head of the far end of table, sue by his side. I sat at the other head with Bella on my right and Lilly on my left. Jasper let himself in quietly and took his seat next to Alice. Food was passed around immediately and I took a moment to take it all in once again. Everything I wanted and everything I never dreamed a year ago was all around me. My love, our daughter, my mother sitting next to my unexpected sister, my friends. The over whelming rightness of the moment settled over me. This was where I belonged.

After dinner and dessert we all made our way into the living room. The moment was finally almost here. Lilly played Santa and passed out everyone's gifts, including her own. We each took turns opening our gifts one at a time going in a giant circle. Every few moments my sister would look at me and gesture with her eyes. I just smiled. I think the waiting was killing Alice more then it was killing me. Everyone in this room knew as soon as all the gifts were opened I was going to do it. Alice was the only one not able to hold herself together.

The final gift was handed out, a pink flat screen tv for Lilly's room from my mom. Then it was over. The moment was here.

"This was a beautiful Christmas." Bella said wistfully. Alice bit her lip and closed her eyes. I stood up from my place on the floor and cleared my throat.

"There's um one more thing. Lilly will you come here please." I held my hand out to her. She ran to me through the piles of ripped Christmas paper. Bella was sitting on the leather ottoman watching me with a raised brow.

"Another gift. Honestly Edward, she's spoiled enough." she said with a laugh. I smiled slightly.

"It's not for Lilly. It's for you." I dropped to one knee in front of her, taking her hand. Alice squealed. Rose and my mother both started to cry silently. Bella's eyes were wide as saucers.

"All my life I've known there was only one woman in this world for me. I have made a lot of assumptions, a lot of mistakes but now I finally feel like I've found a place in this world and Bella, it's here with you and Lilly by my side. I wanted to ask you today, If you would give me the greatest gift of all by becoming my wife." I opened the ring box. It creaked slightly at the hinge. Tears welled in Bella's eyes. "Isabella Marie Swan, will you marry me?" I asked her finally. Nothing had ever felt so good coming out of my mouth. She nodded and sobbed. Lilly clapped as Bella took the ring from me and wrapped her arms around my neck. I spun her gently off the floor.

"What did she say?" Emmett said. Bella unwrapped her arms from my neck and let me put the ring on the third finger of her left hand.

"I said Yes!" she cried and the entire room erupted in applause. Rose, Alice, sue and my mother rushed her to see the ring. Em, Jasper and Charlie high fived me then each other. I excused myself out the front door for a moment needing some air and a moment to consider the things that had brought me home. I immediately thought of my Dad. My heart ached from missing him today of all days. I titled my head back to the darkening winter sky and took a deep breath. The door opened behind me. Bella had come to join me on the porch. She fingered her ring gently. Still smiling as she had been in the house.

"Whatcha doin out here all alone?" I smiled down at her as she wrapped her arms around my waist. I kissed her forehead gently twice.

"Just missing my Dad. I wish he was here." I said. Bella looked up at me.

"I think he always is." she said as a warm breeze blew by in the December night. I knew she was right.

A/n- Well there it is the last chapter. I hope everyone is happy with it. I don't know if there will be an epilogue but I do know there wont be a sequel. I am hoping to be back at the end of August with something new and if you'd like previews or news of that story and my others please follow me on twitter- fanfictrips. You guys really made this story possible and I hope you'll all join me as I journey into another! You guys rock!


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